Go With the Flow | Silver Tongue (T1) [Perm] | Mind Reader [Perm]
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CW: Self-depreciate, heavy grief, internalized toxic masculinity, emotional suppression
Fishfreckle knew that she was still mad at him, she had every right to be. But he knew that he couldn’t just sit by idly and do nothing. Houndkit was just as much his daughter as she was Larkwing’s, and despite his absence and memory issues, he did love the two of them.
He wasn’t quite sure what was going on with his emotions at the moment. Fishfreckle by nature had very few emotional responses outside of ‘angry’ and ‘disappointed’. As such, those two also accompanied the whirlwind of feelings barraging his psyche with unrelenting force. He was out of his element here and all he could do was follow behind Larkwing in silence.
When they reached their destination, Fishfreckle looked on with a frown. He hadn’t been in this part of the territory before. Truth be told, he’d explored very little of the territory since they moved. He also didn’t have a need to come here before. The dead were dead, and the everyone he once loved and cared for had long since died or disappeared without a trace in the territory they held prior to the flood. This was just… depressing. The grass looked dead and the atmosphere in general was simply dreary. The small tom decided in that moment that he didn’t like it here and that he did not wish to return soon, if ever.
Fishfeckle’s judgmental gaze was disrupted by Larkwing approaching him and wordlessly setting Houndkit at his paws. He gave no type of acknowledgment outside of turning his attention to his daughter that lay still before him. Part of him wished to give her a gentle prod, tell her that she had to get up, not to leave her mother and siblings behind. But the rational part of him told him to not do such things, that it’d be pointless and that Houndkit was gone.
Larkwing was digging. Each scrape of the queen’s paws bore into his soul, striking it like a mallet. He hated it. He hated that he was here. It wasn’t because he didn’t want to be here per se, no, it was because of the meaning behind it. This wasn’t because of a simple patrol or anything, he had once again lost someone of great importance to him and it was frustrating.
The mother of his kits didn’t remain digging for long, and the abrupt stop pulled him out of his thoughts. He didn’t want to look. He didn’t want to look at the hole in the ground where poor little Houndkit would rest for the rest of forever. As if out of spite to the world, he quickly dragged his eyes from the limp body at his feet to Larkwing In an attempt to avoid doing so. He was unsuccessful. Te grave was caught in his periphery and that was when the size of it hit him. Why had Houndkit been taken from them? She was far too young, she had yet to experience any of the good (if there was any) or bad that came with life. She had yet to dream of anything or accomplish anything, and that fact crushed Fishfreckle. For what reason did they follow the path of the stars if the stars did not serve their followers? Why was it that everyone in his life left him? His mother, Vinewatcher. His brothers, Jaykit, Mosskit, and Ravenkit. His sister, Pigeonkit. Cherryswirl, Minkpaw and Tansypaw (as annoying as they were), Larkwing before her return, and now Houndkit. What use were the stars if they didn’t guide them and keep them safe? All he wanted was his loved ones to be safe, and to see a RiverClan they could be proud of. Why was that so much to ask?
The wail that Larkwing let out sent a chill along his spine. The pain they both felt in this moment, the anguish, the grief rang clear in her cry. Once more, Fishfreckle found himself growing angry. Angry at StarClan, angry at the Darkforest, angry at the clan itself, but most importantly, angry at himself. He was here now, but what was the point? It was too late. Larkwing was angry with him, and one of his few daughters was dead. He failed. He failed them.
After a moment, their eyes met and his heart skipped a beat. She looked like a mess. The cat who he didn’t really understand how he felt for looked like a total mess. She wore the pain on her face as if she had been holding it in all this time, and the words she said to him? Stars above each one crashed into him like a wave against the shore during a storm. It hurt. It hurt so much. Not long did he get to try to process this before the queen’s weight hit him. It was so sudden that he was nearly knocked off his paws, but he caught himself and adjusted so that she could properly lean on him. He could feel her breath on his neck, and it hit him:
Larkwing was alive. The proof was right there. They still had two kits back at camp that were also breathing just like their mother. He… he couldn’t just give up quite yet, could he? He told Larkwing that the two of them would figure this parenting thing out together, and he had meant that. If it wasn’t too late, he wanted to make things work, and to be more present within his family’s lives. He didn’t know much about Houndkit, and he didn’t want to make that mistake again. He had to do better, he would do better. For her, for the kits, for their family.
”You're right.” At long last his silence was broken. He didn’t try to argue with her, nor did he attempt to make any excuses. She was right, he had promised that and he let her down And he knew it. ”I'm sorry, Larkwing, I let you down. I let you all down.” He said in a trembling whisper. He had to stay strong. He couldn’t let his emotions get the best of him, not right now. He had a duty to remain strong for her, for his love, and for their remaining kits, so he would. He was going to have to take it upon himself to bury Houndkit. Hee didn’t like the idea, nor did he feel as though he had any right to, but he couldn’t ask that of Larkwing, not after this. If she tried to argue with him, he’d just remain adamant and not back down, but for now? For now he would let her lean on him for as long as she needed to.
RowanMane stood beside StarryPaw as a comforting gesture for the apprentice. He couldn’t imagine. He didn’t have a sibling (at least he didn’t think he did), and he couldn’t imagine the grief that came with such a bond being broken. He glanced over the graveyards, a grief flashing over him as he took it in. Storms…the feeling she hated him was overbearing. She was such a respectable cat…and they left it on a bad note. Where he…almost lost it all. Anyways- he was here for the kid, not his own moping (goodness, get a grip RowanMane!). The Lionheart cast his gaze to StarryPaw as she spoke…and asked a question. One of which he was at a loss to answer. RowanMane had foolishly not considered that…”I- there’s…no way on knowin’ righ’ now. We can ask Wisty -ahem- WisteriaWren when we get back where…she…uhm..buried ElderKit, Mk?” he offered gently, trying to help the most he could. “It’s just nice t’ sit…in peace sometimes. Honor those that’ve moved on. They aren’t really alive righ’ now, but I like picking these lil’ purple flowers tha’ grow nearby n’ placin’ them on each grave.” he shared his tradition.
my characters opinions are not my own! —> reply time depends on my motivation and schedule!
_____________________________________ Aresis the Crown of the Atari [an official outsider faction]. If He is Needed, PM/VM or Mention Me. Atari Resources || Bone Crest Throne
He's right. He's right, he's right, he's right. He did let her down. So, why does his admission not feel as vindicating as she had thought it might? Why does it just make the sob bubble up in her throat where she chokes on it? She wants to yell at him some more, but that isn't going to make her feel better, that isn't going to bring Houndkit back, that isn't going to make Faithkit's eyes better. She wants to do it anyway, just to make sure.
Instead, however, Larkwing stays in place, breathing deeply as she tries desperately to calm herself down, breathing in Fishfreckle's scent, distinctly RiverClan, but with a touch of something else, maybe something that he picked up when he'd vanished, maybe something that was simply unique to him, she isn't sure.
It takes a few moments, but, eventually, painfully, she tears herself away from where she'd shoved her fece into his fur, noticing with a slight pang in her chest that, oh, she'd wanted to stay there, hadn't she? Squeezing her eyes shut for the briefest of moments, Larkwing takes a breath and steadies herself. Tries to ground herself.
"I'm ready," she whispers at last. She isn't ready. How could she be ready? But she gently grabs hold of her daughter's pale scruff and lays her down in the shallow grave. She'd thought, before, it had been small, but looking into the pit now leaves a sinking hole in her gut. Suddenly the grave is so much bigger than she'd imagined. Suddenly Hound is so much smaller than she'd thought.
Her mind might be playing tricks on her, making things appear different than they are in reality - it wouldn't be the first time - but she can't find it in herself to force reality to win out. Wordlessly, she offers one last lick to her daughter's ear, gently scooping some of the dirt piled around and beginning to cover her up. Somewhere, she registers that maybe she should invite the father to do the same, and emerald gaze, once so bright, now dull as if the stones had barely seen polish or a glint of the sun in moons, turn onto Fishfreckle, her Fishfreckle, and her chin wobbles.
Berryshine trotted in at a leisurely pace, in no rush; she was here to, quite literally, stop and smell the flowers. Maybe collect some on the way, if StarClan had blessed them with a few sprigs. She glanced over her shoulder, making sure her herb-gathering companion was with her.
"I'm sure y-you've been here already, yes?" She knew Whisperingpaw was still young, and may or may not have had a full territory tour. "It's a lovely spot for herb-gathering in the warmer moons. Lots of them grow here... i-it's like our fallen Clanmates leave little gifts for us, to help take care of the Clan," the medicine cat mused dreamily; it was more poetical musing than anything, but part of her tended to believe it. As a heavily-spiritual cat, Berryshine often looked for the greater meanings within the littler things.
She came to a stop before the lines of graves, green eyes matching the seagrasses as they blew in the wind. Most were still browned, though she could see fresher growth as newleaf slowly dawned upon them.
The herbalist closed her eyes, inhaling the fresh scent; new growth, the saltiness of the nearby sea, the sound of the distant waves against the cliffs... it was a peaceful spot. She often liked coming here, despite the mist that usually hung around their paws. Some found it eerie due to the fact that these fields also acted as a graveyard, and yet interestingly enough... Berryshine found it tranquil. It was quiet here, and part of her almost felt closer to her warrior ancestors on this cliff, with the sound of gentle breezes rushing through the long grasses in her ears.
"Sometimes, new growth sprouts sooner than we think... a s-sign of nature's cycle, continuing on and on. Even after the killer frosts of leaf-bare." Berryshine glanced down at Whisperingpaw, her expression warm and calm; from how jumpy or nervous she usually seemed, it was likely an interesting sight. "Do you happen to see or smell anything you recognize? It might look a little different, o-only as buds or sprouts..." But she was curious if the apprentice could recognize anything starting to grow among the grasses.
Berryshine trotted in at a leisurely pace, in no rush; she was here to, quite literally, stop and smell the flowers. Maybe collect some on the way, if StarClan had blessed them with a few sprigs. She glanced over her shoulder, making sure her herb-gathering companion was with her.
"I'm sure y-you've been here already, yes?" She knew Whisperingpaw was still young, and may or may not have had a full territory tour. "It's a lovely spot for herb-gathering in the warmer moons. Lots of them grow here... i-it's like our fallen Clanmates leave little gifts for us, to help take care of the Clan," the medicine cat mused dreamily; it was more poetical musing than anything, but part of her tended to believe it. As a heavily-spiritual cat, Berryshine often looked for the greater meanings within the littler things.
She came to a stop before the lines of graves, green eyes matching the seagrasses as they blew in the wind. Most were still browned, though she could see fresher growth as newleaf slowly dawned upon them.
The herbalist closed her eyes, inhaling the fresh scent; new growth, the saltiness of the nearby sea, the sound of the distant waves against the cliffs... it was a peaceful spot. She often liked coming here, despite the mist that usually hung around their paws. Some found it eerie due to the fact that these fields also acted as a graveyard, and yet interestingly enough... Berryshine found it tranquil. It was quiet here, and part of her almost felt closer to her warrior ancestors on this cliff, with the sound of gentle breezes rushing through the long grasses in her ears.
"Sometimes, new growth sprouts sooner than we think... a s-sign of nature's cycle, continuing on and on. Even after the killer frosts of leaf-bare." Berryshine glanced down at Whisperingpaw, her expression warm and calm; from how jumpy or nervous she usually seemed, it was likely an interesting sight. "Do you happen to see or smell anything you recognize? It might look a little different, o-only as buds or sprouts..." But she was curious if the apprentice could recognize anything starting to grow among the grasses.
Whipsy followed Berryshine closely, gaze flickering around with a sense of awe as she took in the environment. She looked up at Berryshine timidly, shaking her head. Would flecked she-cat be disappointed? "A-Actually no..." She admitted, looking to her paws in shame. "My previous mentor...we didn't really...ever start training...so..." But she didn't have too much time to hold onto her shame. The scent of new growth hit her nose, and her gaze snapped upwards. She looked to Berryshine, eyes awed and understanding, and nodded. That makes sense. She knew what this place was of course, she had just not been here herself before. Her gaze drifting over the field, showing so signs of finding it 'creepy' to be here. "When I was kit...sometimes I thought I could sense my father's presence." She murmured.
She recalled an instant, when Cobwebstorm had to come check on the kits in the nursery. Some kind of hysteria or something, she couldn't really recall what had happened. But she remembered she had been calm, and in the back of her mind, though she could faintly sense her father there. It was also the incident that she first met Cobwebstorm...a memory that now brought her a lot of grief. She missed Cobwebstorm...but she didn't want to make Berryshine sad by bringing it up. So she said nothing more of it. Only sighing with a soft laugh before waving her tail dismissively. "I'm sure that a lot of kits feel that way though. It's nice...knowing that our ancestors are watching over us." She mewed, blinking from the grass below to the sky above. She had never really perceived any signs from StarClan, but then again, she'd never really looked for them in the smaller ways. Like Berryshine did. "It's nice...to think about. That they're...blessing our medicine cats with herbs. Blessing the clan." It brought a sense of comfort to her, accompanied by a purr.
She glanced at the medicine cat, noticing her close her eyes, and followed suit, nose and whiskers twitching. Was there something Berryshine was listening for? Allowing her mind to quiet, she thought she could hear the sounds of the beach on the edge of her consciousness, eyes popping open once more when she heard Berryshine's voice again. Whispy couldn't help but smile up at Berryshine's calmness, taking in everything she was saying. Turning her bright green eyes to the fields, taking in the signs that Berryshine was talking about. The new growth she had scented earlier, new life poking its way up. As though the death of the grasses before laid the foundation for them to push their way up. She lowered her head, peering at the new, soft growths with wide, and curious eyes. It was fascinating to see, and she wondered if it would be odd for a warrior apprentice to maybe tend to a garden. Mostly because she wanted to be able to come out here and see this more often, watch the cycle even closer. Perhaps if it were here, that would be something that could be approved of?
Whispy blinked up at Berryshine at her question before turning her gaze back down to the new growth she was studying up close. Hmmm...did she recognize anything? She started to feel anxiety creep back up, but forced it down. This wasn't a test, and even if it was it would be okay. Berryshine wouldn't think less of her if she got it wrong. The light gray she-cat's pale green gaze drifted over the growth until she spotted a bud that seemed...familiar. It was closed, with what looked like a little mane around the base of the bud. A little bit of white poking out the top of the bud, but that wasn't the part that seemed familiar. The scent, and the leaves...and as she stared at it, a name came to her instinctively. "Is this one...a dandelion?" She asked tentatively, blinking up at Berryshine with a curious gaze.
Whipsy followed Berryshine closely, gaze flickering around with a sense of awe as she took in the environment. She looked up at Berryshine timidly, shaking her head. Would flecked she-cat be disappointed? "A-Actually no..." She admitted, looking to her paws in shame. "My previous mentor...we didn't really...ever start training...so..." But she didn't have too much time to hold onto her shame. The scent of new growth hit her nose, and her gaze snapped upwards. She looked to Berryshine, eyes awed and understanding, and nodded. That makes sense. She knew what this place was of course, she had just not been here herself before. Her gaze drifting over the field, showing so signs of finding it 'creepy' to be here. "When I was kit...sometimes I thought I could sense my father's presence." She murmured.
She recalled an instant, when Cobwebstorm had to come check on the kits in the nursery. Some kind of hysteria or something, she couldn't really recall what had happened. But she remembered she had been calm, and in the back of her mind, though she could faintly sense her father there. It was also the incident that she first met Cobwebstorm...a memory that now brought her a lot of grief. She missed Cobwebstorm...but she didn't want to make Berryshine sad by bringing it up. So she said nothing more of it. Only sighing with a soft laugh before waving her tail dismissively. "I'm sure that a lot of kits feel that way though. It's nice...knowing that our ancestors are watching over us." She mewed, blinking from the grass below to the sky above. She had never really perceived any signs from StarClan, but then again, she'd never really looked for them in the smaller ways. Like Berryshine did. "It's nice...to think about. That they're...blessing our medicine cats with herbs. Blessing the clan." It brought a sense of comfort to her, accompanied by a purr.
She glanced at the medicine cat, noticing her close her eyes, and followed suit, nose and whiskers twitching. Was there something Berryshine was listening for? Allowing her mind to quiet, she thought she could hear the sounds of the beach on the edge of her consciousness, eyes popping open once more when she heard Berryshine's voice again. Whispy couldn't help but smile up at Berryshine's calmness, taking in everything she was saying. Turning her bright green eyes to the fields, taking in the signs that Berryshine was talking about. The new growth she had scented earlier, new life poking its way up. As though the death of the grasses before laid the foundation for them to push their way up. She lowered her head, peering at the new, soft growths with wide, and curious eyes. It was fascinating to see, and she wondered if it would be odd for a warrior apprentice to maybe tend to a garden. Mostly because she wanted to be able to come out here and see this more often, watch the cycle even closer. Perhaps if it were here, that would be something that could be approved of?
Whispy blinked up at Berryshine at her question before turning her gaze back down to the new growth she was studying up close. Hmmm...did she recognize anything? She started to feel anxiety creep back up, but forced it down. This wasn't a test, and even if it was it would be okay. Berryshine wouldn't think less of her if she got it wrong. The light gray she-cat's pale green gaze drifted over the growth until she spotted a bud that seemed...familiar. It was closed, with what looked like a little mane around the base of the bud. A little bit of white poking out the top of the bud, but that wasn't the part that seemed familiar. The scent, and the leaves...and as she stared at it, a name came to her instinctively. "Is this one...a dandelion?" She asked tentatively, blinking up at Berryshine with a curious gaze.
Berryshine looked sympathetic that Whisperingpaw had never really started proper training; she'd had the same issue, and that was partly why she'd never really learned how to swim, hunt, or fight before being taken on as a medicine apprentice. She was happy to see as well that the young she-cat didn't seem unnerved by the place, nodding to her words about her father's presence.
"They are watching over us, you know... o-our ancestors. It's a good feeling, t-to know that they're present, guiding our steps... having spoken to some of them myself, I know just how involved they are. Perhaps you really did feel your father's presence that day..." She trailed off for a moment and gave the apprentice a soft smile, not wanting to get too into it as they were here for other purposes, but wanting to encourage her all the same. Too many cats nowadays seemed jaded, rejecting StarClan or simply not caring. Berryshine wasn't like that, and hoped her own faith could inspire a few others', even during this strange lapse in connection after the Starcave collapse... something she desperately wanted to get to the bottom of. But that was a concern for another day.
In the meantime, it felt wonderful to be able to show Whisperingpaw an important part of their territory, for both the living and the dead. And it seemed that the apprentice was appreciating it as much as the medic was.
Green eyes traveled down to her pale-coated companion as she sniffed at the new growth, smiling a bit to herself as she watched. Berryshine then lit up a bit in approval, a purr at the back of her throat.
"Exactly right," she mewed happily, poking some of the shaped leaves of the common herb. "Dandelion grows very fast, a-and very wide. You'll see these popping up everywhere quite soon, as the moons grow warmer. They bloom yellow flowers, b-but they turn into these puffy white plumes of seeds that eventually blow away... spreading the seeds so that more will grow elsewhere," the medicine cat went on, enthusing over the process. Many warriors would've likely found it boring, given that a cat's fascination with plants wasn't exactly... a popular one. But Berryshine could go on all day if she wanted.
The small brown molly reached forward, gingerly nipping off some of the leaves — only a few, leaving the rest. "T-The leaves are the most important part for me to use. They can be chewed for pain relief— ah... perhaps I'm repeating myself. Maybe you recalled that from my first aid demonstration?" Berryshine chuckled, remembering Whisperingpaw as being one of the apt listeners of the event. She straightened up, gesturing to the new growth with her tail. "W-With most plants, unless we need something like the roots, you want to leave as much as possible in the ground. That way, it can regrow later in the season or for the next cycle, if its roots are deep enough."
This was an herb-gathering trip, not a knowledge training, but the medic could hardly help herself; Whisperingpaw seemed intrigued on her own, and Berryshine was happy to feed those curiosities. She paused there to see if her companion had any questions or comments. She hadn't forgotten what Whispy had said earlier, either, about being troubled with doubt; perhaps the two of them could have a nice chat out here. It was a nice day.
[ +1 dandelion ]
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Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she has a semi-closed den policy.
Berryshine looked sympathetic that Whisperingpaw had never really started proper training; she'd had the same issue, and that was partly why she'd never really learned how to swim, hunt, or fight before being taken on as a medicine apprentice. She was happy to see as well that the young she-cat didn't seem unnerved by the place, nodding to her words about her father's presence.
"They are watching over us, you know... o-our ancestors. It's a good feeling, t-to know that they're present, guiding our steps... having spoken to some of them myself, I know just how involved they are. Perhaps you really did feel your father's presence that day..." She trailed off for a moment and gave the apprentice a soft smile, not wanting to get too into it as they were here for other purposes, but wanting to encourage her all the same. Too many cats nowadays seemed jaded, rejecting StarClan or simply not caring. Berryshine wasn't like that, and hoped her own faith could inspire a few others', even during this strange lapse in connection after the Starcave collapse... something she desperately wanted to get to the bottom of. But that was a concern for another day.
In the meantime, it felt wonderful to be able to show Whisperingpaw an important part of their territory, for both the living and the dead. And it seemed that the apprentice was appreciating it as much as the medic was.
Green eyes traveled down to her pale-coated companion as she sniffed at the new growth, smiling a bit to herself as she watched. Berryshine then lit up a bit in approval, a purr at the back of her throat.
"Exactly right," she mewed happily, poking some of the shaped leaves of the common herb. "Dandelion grows very fast, a-and very wide. You'll see these popping up everywhere quite soon, as the moons grow warmer. They bloom yellow flowers, b-but they turn into these puffy white plumes of seeds that eventually blow away... spreading the seeds so that more will grow elsewhere," the medicine cat went on, enthusing over the process. Many warriors would've likely found it boring, given that a cat's fascination with plants wasn't exactly... a popular one. But Berryshine could go on all day if she wanted.
The small brown molly reached forward, gingerly nipping off some of the leaves — only a few, leaving the rest. "T-The leaves are the most important part for me to use. They can be chewed for pain relief— ah... perhaps I'm repeating myself. Maybe you recalled that from my first aid demonstration?" Berryshine chuckled, remembering Whisperingpaw as being one of the apt listeners of the event. She straightened up, gesturing to the new growth with her tail. "W-With most plants, unless we need something like the roots, you want to leave as much as possible in the ground. That way, it can regrow later in the season or for the next cycle, if its roots are deep enough."
This was an herb-gathering trip, not a knowledge training, but the medic could hardly help herself; Whisperingpaw seemed intrigued on her own, and Berryshine was happy to feed those curiosities. She paused there to see if her companion had any questions or comments. She hadn't forgotten what Whispy had said earlier, either, about being troubled with doubt; perhaps the two of them could have a nice chat out here. It was a nice day.
[ +1 dandelion ]
Whispy looked up at Berryshine with warmth as she spoke of their ancestor's constant presence. A wistful sigh leaving her. "That's comforting." She murmured, swishing her tail around her paws. "I-I know...many cats are upset right now...with our ancestors. But..." She shuffled her paws timidly. How to put this to words? "I feel like...if we lose faith...then how do we know?" That made no sense. She blinked up at Berryshine, the struggle to put her feelings into words apparent on her face. "What I mean is...I put my faith in StarClan everyday. That...no matter where I end up...they're guiding me to where I need to be." There, that made more sense. She turned her gaze upwards towards the sky, a certain sadness in her eyes. Sadness for the cats who didn't have this comfort in their hearts. "Without that...there are so many times I would feel...completely lost."
The pale gray cat appreciated Berryshine's reassurance. Saying it outloud reminded her of her resolve. She had promised herself to find satisfaction in wherever StarClan led her paws, her doubts and anxieties were nothing but a betrayal to the promise. The young cat let out a deep sigh, but not of despair. As she exhaled, she felt herself grow calmer. More at peace. Then to be replaced by excited when Berryshine said she had gotten the answer correct. She watched and listened closely, giggling softly when Berryshine remembered that she went over this during the first aid training. But that was fine, she didn't mind. Whispy nodded eagerly, listening as Berryshine described how the plant spread it seeds. And how to be careful when harvesting parts of the plant. "Th-That's so amazing!" She purred in her soft voice. Looking back down at the dandelion buds spread out around their paws. "That means that...these little buds have probably seen...s-so much of the outside world!" It was truly a breath-taking thought.
Whispy didn't mind the herb gathering trip being a learning opportunity. She was beginning to really enjoy learning about herbs and plants in general, whether she trained as a warrior or not she wanted to know about them. "I-I know it's not...necessary for a warrior to know these things." She mewed, bending forward to carefully chew off a leaf from the stem of a different growth before continuing. After all, the point here was to help gather herbs! "B-But still...I love it!" She purred happily, blinking up at Berryshine. "Is that...o-okay?" She wanted to ask more, but she wasn't sure if she could. But...Berryshine was super nice and understanding. So...she shouldn't be mad? Right? "A-And...would it be okay if...I-I learned about plants? Even if...e-even if I'm training...to be a warrior?" She didn't have to say it. And she knew. Whispy knew that Berryshine could probably see on her face, this was the source of her doubt and conflict. But if she was truly how StarClan intended her to be, then surely... If I'm meant to train as a warrior, but enjoy plants and learning about herbs, surely that's okay...right? If it is...truly StarClan's will.
Berryshine eyes had glowed when Whisperingpaw meowed about putting faith in StarClan. The medicine cat nodded in approval, grateful to know that there were at least some others out there who shared her sentiments when it came to their warrior ancestors. And when she said that without it she'd feel so lost...
"S-Same here," she purred, resting her tail briefly on the young apprentice's shoulder. There was a bit of melancholy in Berry's tone; after the Starcave collapse and connection to StarClan had been severed, the medic had felt a considerable gap between her and her spiritual roots. She'd yearned and ached to restore that connection... but until the Clans could figure out how, they'd be stuck on their own for awhile. But Berryshine wouldn't unload these existential thoughts onto the young 'paw.
She did let out a soft chuckle, however, and nodded when Whispy mentioning the buds having traveled far and seen many things. Oh, to be a little floating seed, and all the things you'd see... it was a silly, but still whimsical sort of thought.
And at the end, those little questions made Berryshine turn her head to look back at Whisperingpaw while they'd gathered. She'd plucked a bit more dandelion from the ground, mindful to spare the new growth, but listened to the apprentice as she spoke. With a comforting purr, Berry padded back over, giving Whisperingpaw a sympathetic and encouraging smile.
"Is it okay...? J-Just fine, I'd say. Even fully trained warriors h-have their various interests outside of hunting and fighting," she mewed, thinking of Stagheart and his rock-tossing (and skipping), and Owlstar with her... er... prey-mutilation. To each their own! Berryshine's bright green eyes traveled back to Whispy after a thoughtful glance around the fields. "Perhaps StarClan put those interests in your heart f-for a reason. Whether it's for hobby, o-or to save somecat's life someday, who knows."
Once more, she rested her skinny tail on Whispy's shoulder in a reassuring gesture. "While your focus should b-be on what you're training for—to serve your Clan as a warrior—as long as you're not neglecting your duties, I see n-no harm in picking some things up along the way. And if you couldn't tell, I-I'm always happy to chat about herbs," she added with a soft laugh.
Berryshine could tell that Whisperingpaw perhaps felt conflicted about her interest in herbs — and perhaps this was what she was alluding to earlier, not understanding her callings. Did the apprentice not have an affinity for her warrior duties? She was far from the only apprentice who'd had apprehensions towards things like combat, but most grew out of it (at least enough to earn their warrior names). Others, like Stagheart, were born 'n bred for such a calling. She couldn't help but wonder what Whisperingpaw would look like in a few moons — still like this, or having evolved?
"Everycat has their own path, Whisperingpaw... y-you just keep going as you are, a faithful apprentice of RiverClan, and... the r-rest will follow. StarClan will guide you as you go, even in ways you don't realize," Berryshine mused, giving her a nod. "Just trust that... and what will or is meant to be, will be."
If that wasn't spot on for how Berry had gotten to this point so far, then nothing was. Easier said than done.
[ @Luna16 - edit as of 04/16/25: I NEVER TAGGED YOU LOL i genuinely thought i forgot to reply but nope. i'm just silly ]
__________________
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she has a semi-closed den policy.
RowanMane stood beside StarryPaw as a comforting gesture for the apprentice. He couldn’t imagine. He didn’t have a sibling (at least he didn’t think he did), and he couldn’t imagine the grief that came with such a bond being broken. He glanced over the graveyards, a grief flashing over him as he took it in. Storms…the feeling she hated him was overbearing. She was such a respectable cat…and they left it on a bad note. Where he…almost lost it all. Anyways- he was here for the kid, not his own moping (goodness, get a grip RowanMane!). The Lionheart cast his gaze to StarryPaw as she spoke…and asked a question. One of which he was at a loss to answer. RowanMane had foolishly not considered that…”I- there’s…no way on knowin’ righ’ now. We can ask Wisty -ahem- WisteriaWren when we get back where…she…uhm..buried ElderKit, Mk?” he offered gently, trying to help the most he could. “It’s just nice t’ sit…in peace sometimes. Honor those that’ve moved on. They aren’t really alive righ’ now, but I like picking these lil’ purple flowers tha’ grow nearby n’ placin’ them on each grave.” he shared his tradition.
Starrypaw looked at Rowanmane with a spark of disappointment in her eyes, though she made sure to cancel it as soon as she realized it. It isn't his fault he doesn't know... of course we can't remember each cat's place. What a stupid question... She thought with sadness, staring down at the ground under her paws.
The white bengal raised her gaze back to the warrior once he offered her another way to honor Elderkit. She glanced around, now noticing the tiny little flowers sprouting from the rich grass like tiny stars in a green sea. They are so... beautiful..
Silently, she padded forward and stayed still for some time. How much, she couldn't remember.
Her paws planted in the ground, she kept her head high as the strong wind ruffled her fur and moved her tail around. It was peaceful, almost like a blessing from Starclan. Starclan... are you watching now?
"...Elderkit..." She whispered, imagining the word being carried away by the wind as if it was a leaf. She gathered courage, inspired and let her voice come out without control. "My sister... I love you so much. You were my only family, my shoulder, my friend. And please, know that you're not forgotten..." She prayed, letting warm tears wet her cheeks.
"Today, I make an oath before you and all of Starclan." She recited, opening slightly her eyes against the breeze, in a low but steady voice. "I will become stronger, braver, for you. I will hunt prey and fight my demons. I will chase the birds, maybe trying to get closer to you, and find the bird that took you away from me."This is a promise, Elderkit. Hear me out, please...
Berryshine eyes had glowed when Whisperingpaw meowed about putting faith in StarClan. The medicine cat nodded in approval, grateful to know that there were at least some others out there who shared her sentiments when it came to their warrior ancestors. And when she said that without it she'd feel so lost...
"S-Same here," she purred, resting her tail briefly on the young apprentice's shoulder. There was a bit of melancholy in Berry's tone; after the Starcave collapse and connection to StarClan had been severed, the medic had felt a considerable gap between her and her spiritual roots. She'd yearned and ached to restore that connection... but until the Clans could figure out how, they'd be stuck on their own for awhile. But Berryshine wouldn't unload these existential thoughts onto the young 'paw.
She did let out a soft chuckle, however, and nodded when Whispy mentioning the buds having traveled far and seen many things. Oh, to be a little floating seed, and all the things you'd see... it was a silly, but still whimsical sort of thought.
And at the end, those little questions made Berryshine turn her head to look back at Whisperingpaw while they'd gathered. She'd plucked a bit more dandelion from the ground, mindful to spare the new growth, but listened to the apprentice as she spoke. With a comforting purr, Berry padded back over, giving Whisperingpaw a sympathetic and encouraging smile.
"Is it okay...? J-Just fine, I'd say. Even fully trained warriors h-have their various interests outside of hunting and fighting," she mewed, thinking of Stagheart and his rock-tossing (and skipping), and Owlstar with her... er... prey-mutilation. To each their own! Berryshine's bright green eyes traveled back to Whispy after a thoughtful glance around the fields. "Perhaps StarClan put those interests in your heart f-for a reason. Whether it's for hobby, o-or to save somecat's life someday, who knows."
Once more, she rested her skinny tail on Whispy's shoulder in a reassuring gesture. "While your focus should b-be on what you're training for—to serve your Clan as a warrior—as long as you're not neglecting your duties, I see n-no harm in picking some things up along the way. And if you couldn't tell, I-I'm always happy to chat about herbs," she added with a soft laugh.
Berryshine could tell that Whisperingpaw perhaps felt conflicted about her interest in herbs — and perhaps this was what she was alluding to earlier, not understanding her callings. Did the apprentice not have an affinity for her warrior duties? She was far from the only apprentice who'd had apprehensions towards things like combat, but most grew out of it (at least enough to earn their warrior names). Others, like Stagheart, were born 'n bred for such a calling. She couldn't help but wonder what Whisperingpaw would look like in a few moons — still like this, or having evolved?
"Everycat has their own path, Whisperingpaw... y-you just keep going as you are, a faithful apprentice of RiverClan, and... the r-rest will follow. StarClan will guide you as you go, even in ways you don't realize," Berryshine mused, giving her a nod. "Just trust that... and what will or is meant to be, will be."
If that wasn't spot on for how Berry had gotten to this point so far, then nothing was. Easier said than done.
[ @Luna16 - edit as of 04/16/25: I NEVER TAGGED YOU LOL i genuinely thought i forgot to reply but nope. i'm just silly ]
Whisperingpaw looked up at Berryshine when she spoke, smiling softly at the healer's gesture of placing her tail on her shoulders. But that sadness...the sadness that she saw in Berryshine's eyes... Her brows furrowed. It seemed that Berryshine was stuck in some deep and troubling thoughts. "A-Are you okay?" She asked, but then shook her head. No, that was the wrong question. "I mean...what's troubling you?" There. That was what she actually meant to ask. She really needed to do better at selecting her words with precision... But she was thankful that it was Berryshine she was speaking with.
Whispy gathered a few more stems of the dandelion, looking up curiously at Berryshine as the healer approached her. Curiosity and hope. She really didn't want Berryshine to be upset with her at her question...not that she'd blame the medicine cat if she were. But that wasn't what the -paw saw in the healer's gaze. She saw...understanding. And a calm sensation came over Whispy in that moment. She beamed, tail twitching about happily as she hummed her agreement. So...having this interest didn't make her odd. And her path, it could be anything. She knew that what Berryshine said was right, she believed that too. That if she continued following StarClan's path, whether they had their direct connection restored or not, she would eventually find her place. "Trust." She purred, looking down at the dandelions briefly before looking back up at Berryshine. "In my heart...I-I know that the right thing! She trilled softly.
Wow! Spending time with Berryshine was...better than she ever anticipated! And the medic seemed to be feeling a little better, so that was good too. It seemed to Whispy that Berryshine enjoyed her company too, at least a little. So at the very least...I'm not a pest. Whispy could hardly stop purring at this rate, she was having such fun! "D-Do you have a garden?" She asked, turning to look at Berryshine with an excited sparkle in her eyes. "I could help you with it! Oh! And you can always send me on herb patrols!" That way, she could learn more and be fulfilling her duties! And helping with a garden - or even multiple! Wasn't that a simply delightful thought? - would give her an opportunity to learn and spend more time with Berryshine. Whispy shuffled her paws timidly before speaking again. "I-I hope...that we can continue to be friends." She mewed.
She wasn't expecting Berryshine to say no per say, but she also wasn't sure if being medicine cat came with some kind of friendship restrictions or something. Whispy knew that the rank came with different rules than the warriors had to abide by, or rather additional rules. But this, taking about different plants and StarClan and gathering herbs, was the most fun Whispy has had in a long time! She couldn't help a giggle of giddy joy, leaping to her paws. "Are there more?" She asked, her gaze almost pleading. "Herbs and plants here I m-mean." Or...was their excursion at its end? She didn't really want it to, but then again if all good things lasted forever how could we distinguish them from being good or not?
[OOC: LOL girl that's okay but also makes me worry about you. Also side note: I love how Berryshine is trying to avoid loading Whispy with philosophical jargon and she's like, doing it to herself. ]
Re: Seagrass Fields
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat! 
i genuinely thought i forgot to reply but nope. i'm just silly ] 
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