RIVERSONG
[ she/her | 30 moons at death | dark forest ]
cw transphobia, cat racism??
a weak cat wouldve called it failure. a fool would blame herself for her childrens failure. riversong knew better.
she had always been far above clan rats. hawksoul had been fun to toy with while it lasted, if only she hadnt felt the sickening squirm or life deep within her gut. he was useless. a cat like her shouldnt have had to put up with someone as weak as him.
looking back, disgust was all she could see. not for herself, no, her ability to determine truth had never faltered.
she was meant for more than this. killed like some scum. like she didnt know more than them. like she hadnt always been their martyr.
had they listened..riversong couldve engulfed them in serennedy. been their saviour. just as intended. but they werent worthy. and she had allowed herself to extend an olive branch, only for it to be stomped out by heavy boots.
her surroundings pulsated menacingly as anger flowed freely through her veins. the faint red glow, almost angelic, almost perfect, surrounding her stood out amongst the dark trees. large, far larger than life, they extended into the cloudy sky, bending unnaturally to the point of almost meeting one another in the middle.
riversong had been preparing. a replica of her hellspawns birthplace. twisted and nauseating like a kits fever dream. they deserved nothing less than torture, her disappointing daughters.
clouds rushed along the sky overhead, grumbling low, a deep grey. dirty, disgusting, slimy and wet. with rotting leaves and bark covering every inch of soil and the heady sweet scent of death mingling with the faint scent of blood, it was perfect.
she remembered like it was yesterday, laying her trust in minkkit, a replica of her own purity shining bright in the she kit... the sickness, destined sickness. mudkit had never been of any worth, blood dirty, tainted by the windclanners failure. he had died too early, it was her kits fault. no matter how much of a burden he had been, riversong preferred the ease to keeping a servant. his unusual obsession with their daughters simply played into her cards.
saint and deity, riversong had never struggled to extend her grace towards those worthy of the gift. what she saw in minkkit had been..extraordinary..
a sharp flash of light snapped through the air, the sky overhead roared with thunder and the heavy rain began. finally, as she had on their final day. the last hope not yet lost. riversong closed her eyes, called to Creation. instead of plunging her heir into the gaping waters, she extended sharp claws out into shadowclan. grime crawled up her paws like thousands of bugs and another wave of deep disappointment hit her. how could they.
another lightningstrike hit a tree to her left, whipping long branches like anger had posessed its sharp needles to lash out at the others. riversong closed her paw, claws snapping together with fury and the filth crumbled off her pristine fur.
her spawn, one once bright and full of potential, and the embodiment of hawk in gangly limbs and splotty fur, would manifest in the distorted forest, drenched from head to paw within seconds.
riversongs sleek fur remained untouched by the rain and storm raging all around, voice echoing around the two.
"two will never make one, not even my soul can overshadow the impurities laced among your blood." she thundered, "once bright, you have fallen to ruin, daughter." silky tones turned harsh at the last word, spitting the truth at her spawn. "no matter your how hard you try, a game of play pretend is doomed to shatter upon impact."
burning eyes changed target, whipping over with enough force to be underlined by a gust of wind.
"it is hardly possible to manifest a presence lonelier than that of a dying kitten, yet you live it every day. the first time you surprise me, yet not even your most disappointing mistake."
before either of the cats could blink, the dark forest resident disappeared, leaving them within a dark, claustrophobic forest and more unanswered questions than one could count.
[ riversong/mud/rook dream at last... apologies for any mistakes, mobile posts are the bane of my existence | @Marigoldwhisper - mudslide ]
__________________
✮" in all timelines, in all possibilities,.. only you. "✮
RIVERSONG
[ she/her | 30 moons at death | dark forest ]
cw transphobia, cat racism??
a weak cat wouldve called it failure. a fool would blame herself for her childrens failure. riversong knew better.
she had always been far above clan rats. hawksoul had been fun to toy with while it lasted, if only she hadnt felt the sickening squirm or life deep within her gut. he was useless. a cat like her shouldnt have had to put up with someone as weak as him.
looking back, disgust was all she could see. not for herself, no, her ability to determine truth had never faltered.
she was meant for more than this. killed like some scum. like she didnt know more than them. like she hadnt always been their martyr.
had they listened..riversong couldve engulfed them in serennedy. been their saviour. just as intended. but they werent worthy. and she had allowed herself to extend an olive branch, only for it to be stomped out by heavy boots.
her surroundings pulsated menacingly as anger flowed freely through her veins. the faint red glow, almost angelic, almost perfect, surrounding her stood out amongst the dark trees. large, far larger than life, they extended into the cloudy sky, bending unnaturally to the point of almost meeting one another in the middle.
riversong had been preparing. a replica of her hellspawns birthplace. twisted and nauseating like a kits fever dream. they deserved nothing less than torture, her disappointing daughters.
clouds rushed along the sky overhead, grumbling low, a deep grey. dirty, disgusting, slimy and wet. with rotting leaves and bark covering every inch of soil and the heady sweet scent of death mingling with the faint scent of blood, it was perfect.
she remembered like it was yesterday, laying her trust in minkkit, a replica of her own purity shining bright in the she kit... the sickness, destined sickness. mudkit had never been of any worth, blood dirty, tainted by the windclanners failure. he had died too early, it was her kits fault. no matter how much of a burden he had been, riversong preferred the ease to keeping a servant. his unusual obsession with their daughters simply played into her cards.
saint and deity, riversong had never struggled to extend her grace towards those worthy of the gift. what she saw in minkkit had been..extraordinary..
a sharp flash of light snapped through the air, the sky overhead roared with thunder and the heavy rain began. finally, as she had on their final day. the last hope not yet lost. riversong closed her eyes, called to Creation. instead of plunging her heir into the gaping waters, she extended sharp claws out into shadowclan. grime crawled up her paws like thousands of bugs and another wave of deep disappointment hit her. how could they.
another lightningstrike hit a tree to her left, whipping long branches like anger had posessed its sharp needles to lash out at the others. riversong closed her paw, claws snapping together with fury and the filth crumbled off her pristine fur.
her spawn, one once bright and full of potential, and the embodiment of hawk in gangly limbs and splotty fur, would manifest in the distorted forest, drenched from head to paw within seconds.
riversongs sleek fur remained untouched by the rain and storm raging all around, voice echoing around the two.
"two will never make one, not even my soul can overshadow the impurities laced among your blood." she thundered, "once bright, you have fallen to ruin, daughter." silky tones turned harsh at the last word, spitting the truth at her spawn. "no matter your how hard you try, a game of play pretend is doomed to shatter upon impact."
burning eyes changed target, whipping over with enough force to be underlined by a gust of wind.
"it is hardly possible to manifest a presence lonelier than that of a dying kitten, yet you live it every day. the first time you surprise me, yet not even your most disappointing mistake."
before either of the cats could blink, the dark forest resident disappeared, leaving them within a dark, claustrophobic forest and more unanswered questions than one could count.
[ riversong/mud/rook dream at last... apologies for any mistakes, mobile posts are the bane of my existence | @Marigoldwhisper - mudslide ]
Mudslide
She, Her\Enforcer\24 moons\Shadowclan
"There's blood in the water. The quiet are restless, the silent are still"
Mudslide had been sleeping... Or at least trying to. The metallic tang of blood from the Enforcer battle was still smelt in the clearing and held a presence in her marbled nose. Mudslide lay curled up on her mossbed, shielding her adoptive brother from streams of moonlight and splashes of mud from the warriors or apprentices who insisted on being busy at an hour so late.
Mudslide didn't mind all that much though, the buzzing of her own paws was enough to keep her disconnected. She was aware Roachflare was asleep already, Mudslide was not. She was never a quick sleeper, too many thoughts and anxieties gripped at her. She kept wondering what would happen, what hadn't happened, and why she couldn't simply be as insignificant as she was supposed to be.
She ran her rough tongue over her friends shoulder, mainly for her comfort, but theirs as well. Finally, the oriental allowed sleep to take her, even if her thoughts hadn't subsided.
The crack of lighting made her jolt upwards, quickly taking note of the mud underneath her paws and the heaviness of her pelt. It was raining, and something had just clearly died. The Enforcer sputtered, confused and dazed, still half-lucid despite the startling wake.
Large paws trembled as she staggered upwards, quickly registering the forest around her. Everything looked so tight and compact, dark and suffocating. The rain was insufferable and the ground wasn't stable. Her multicoloured paws quickly gained a layer of mud and splinters. She was confused, unbelievably confused. Her first thought was about bug, clearly. She had no idea where he was, no idea where she was, and no idea how to reach him.
But, she didn't have to wonder for long. She was home. That godforsaken place... She was home. Disgust and pure peril weighed down onto her, remembering her emotions of abandonment clear, the sightless eyes of her father, her desperate searching. Mudslide quickly took an uneven inhale, and the sharp pang of her newly gained injury greeted her. Relief wracked her senses, almost enough to replace the urge to throw up. She hadn't been sent back in time somehow, thank goodness. The thought of that was terrible, having to relive her worst moments accompanied by those with her most joy. There was a version of herself trapped here, a more vulnerable her that she had to leave behind.
And then she heard her.
As soon as the words met her ears, Mudslide snarled, still dazed and deathly confused. It was nauseating, the amount of emotions she went through in merely a few seconds, and that new emotion was rage. She wanted to kill Riversong. She knew she couldn't, the foxheart was already dead. But just because she wasn't living didn't mean she was safe from her claws. Her mother's words came out sharp, and Mudslide scowled, not offering a lick of a response other than the pain churning in her belly. If mother thought she was truly lonely, she must not know about Roachflare and Mudslide prayed she never would. She didn't want them getting hurt.
It took awhile for her to realize that somecat else was here, dragged to where Mudslide had grown up. Blinking away rainfall and watching as the eerie red glow of her mother slowly left her line of sight, she looked over to where Riversong had been glaring earlier. Was it squeaks? Was she actually safe, actually okay? But no, it wasn't her sister, it was Rookfire.
"You." She wheezed. "Leave."
Why... Why was he here? Of course. Of course she dragged some random cat here, just so somecat would have a window into her inner turmoil. Right. Yup. Gotta check off all the boxes.
rookfire wasnt a stranger to odd dreams and uninvited visitors, though the frequency of their appearances had calmed since his demotion. these visitors however, didnt usually come with their own surroundings and abilities. he knew the difficulties of controlling a dreamscape around yourself alone, like balancing on tightropes. one misstep and everything either crumbled or you woke, panting and with the lingering feeling of being watched.
the cold wasnt even very off putting at first, not unlike his own dreamscape, the thunder and lightning cracking overhead however got his heart racing. rookfire scrambled to stand, eyes wide open and snapping around in order to make out anything of use. anything to help him determine his location and the intent of whomever had built this elaborate scheme from the ground up.
trees with claw like branches, bending dangerously. rookfires eyes followed them up to where they met at the top, dark sky only rarely visible through the shifting canopy. it was like being trapped in a bent mirror, a fishbowl perhaps, with usually straight structures looming over you. there was no biting fog, but the dark that stuck between the trees like thick tar limited visibility all the same.
finally, cool grey eyes made out the faint red glow, moving towards him through the darkness. fear rushed cold and damp through his body, instinct pushing him backwards without peeling his eyes from the entity. rookfire yelped as the shadows trapped him briefly, darkness intruding through his maw and nostrils, forcing its way down his throat and resting heavy in his lungs. he'd never drowned, but stars if this wasnt what it felt like. limbs buckled under the impossibly weight, sluggish and he barely stumbled back into the clearing, gagging. the darkness dripped from his maw like diseased blood, rough retching swallowed entirely by his surroundings.
somehow everything was too much and too little at the same time, every rustle, every gust of wind through the needled trees above echoed like screams inside his mind, while he moved as if submerged in a bog, dull, sluggish, unseeing, total sensory deprivation. too much too much too-
lightning flashed in front of him, blindingly bright and stunning the tom for a pawful of seconds.
dark, sleek fur, translucent and red tinted. dead. long dead. this was not supposed to happened.
"no-" he managed between ragged breaths, throat burning with tightness. the enforcer managed to stay present, fighting off another one of those blinding sets of fear he'd only ever shared with his former mentor.
despite it all, despite the pain and suffering, despite the nightmares and paralysing fear, despite all the goddamn anger, her words hurt.
he'd refused to stop, moving through discomfort and fear in search of his truth. faced his doubts and still, her words felt like he was back at the start. scared and disgusted. wrong
he.. she was wrong.
jaws flexed, teeth grinding down on one another roughly as he attempted to let riversongs words fall of deaf ears. his teeth were bared, blackened by the darkness that had intruded his body and determined to make her regret. he wouldnt let her win, not in death, not ever. rookfire had not fought for all he had only for it to be ruined by a cat that shouldve never survived childbirth.
riversong moved rapidly and he flinched, expecting her to strike at him, but it was only her head. she turned to look at something to his side.. someone? to his side. before he could even make out the shape of another cat within the dim forest, his mothers dull gleam vanished, he stared after her, chest heaving.
rookfire finally turned his head when another voice broke the silence. shifting his attention from where his mother had just disappeared, to where mudslides voice had sounded from, sharp and stronger than he had ever heard from her. despite the anger clearly radiating off of her, any words got stuck in his throat and he was left staring ahead blankly, unblinking, unseeing.
mudslide was no more than a blur of colour, almost melting into the tight darkness surrounding them.
the fear rushing through his body at the sight of his mother was unlike any he had felt in his adult life. paralysing, nauseating dread. she was dead. there was no excuse why starclan should allow this.
rook stumbled forward, memories flashing in front of his inner eye, indistinct smudges of fur slowly filling with colour. he'd thought his last tie to his 'family' had died alongside his father. a kit left to fend for themselves wouldnt survive. so how.
how was any of this possible.
it simply couldnt be.
"why are you here?" he snapped back, surprising even himself with the venom he was spitting whilst feeling the smallest he had in a long long while.
rookfire wasnt a stranger to odd dreams and uninvited visitors, though the frequency of their appearances had calmed since his demotion. these visitors however, didnt usually come with their own surroundings and abilities. he knew the difficulties of controlling a dreamscape around yourself alone, like balancing on tightropes. one misstep and everything either crumbled or you woke, panting and with the lingering feeling of being watched.
the cold wasnt even very off putting at first, not unlike his own dreamscape, the thunder and lightning cracking overhead however got his heart racing. rookfire scrambled to stand, eyes wide open and snapping around in order to make out anything of use. anything to help him determine his location and the intent of whomever had built this elaborate scheme from the ground up.
trees with claw like branches, bending dangerously. rookfires eyes followed them up to where they met at the top, dark sky only rarely visible through the shifting canopy. it was like being trapped in a bent mirror, a fishbowl perhaps, with usually straight structures looming over you. there was no biting fog, but the dark that stuck between the trees like thick tar limited visibility all the same.
finally, cool grey eyes made out the faint red glow, moving towards him through the darkness. fear rushed cold and damp through his body, instinct pushing him backwards without peeling his eyes from the entity. rookfire yelped as the shadows trapped him briefly, darkness intruding through his maw and nostrils, forcing its way down his throat and resting heavy in his lungs. he'd never drowned, but stars if this wasnt what it felt like. limbs buckled under the impossibly weight, sluggish and he barely stumbled back into the clearing, gagging. the darkness dripped from his maw like diseased blood, rough retching swallowed entirely by his surroundings.
somehow everything was too much and too little at the same time, every rustle, every gust of wind through the needled trees above echoed like screams inside his mind, while he moved as if submerged in a bog, dull, sluggish, unseeing, total sensory deprivation. too much too much too-
lightning flashed in front of him, blindingly bright and stunning the tom for a pawful of seconds.
dark, sleek fur, translucent and red tinted. dead. long dead. this was not supposed to happened.
"no-" he managed between ragged breaths, throat burning with tightness. the enforcer managed to stay present, fighting off another one of those blinding sets of fear he'd only ever shared with his former mentor.
despite it all, despite the pain and suffering, despite the nightmares and paralysing fear, despite all the goddamn anger, her words hurt.
he'd refused to stop, moving through discomfort and fear in search of his truth. faced his doubts and still, her words felt like he was back at the start. scared and disgusted. wrong
he.. she was wrong.
jaws flexed, teeth grinding down on one another roughly as he attempted to let riversongs words fall of deaf ears. his teeth were bared, blackened by the darkness that had intruded his body and determined to make her regret. he wouldnt let her win, not in death, not ever. rookfire had not fought for all he had only for it to be ruined by a cat that shouldve never survived childbirth.
riversong moved rapidly and he flinched, expecting her to strike at him, but it was only her head. she turned to look at something to his side.. someone? to his side. before he could even make out the shape of another cat within the dim forest, his mothers dull gleam vanished, he stared after her, chest heaving.
rookfire finally turned his head when another voice broke the silence. shifting his attention from where his mother had just disappeared, to where mudslides voice had sounded from, sharp and stronger than he had ever heard from her. despite the anger clearly radiating off of her, any words got stuck in his throat and he was left staring ahead blankly, unblinking, unseeing.
mudslide was no more than a blur of colour, almost melting into the tight darkness surrounding them.
the fear rushing through his body at the sight of his mother was unlike any he had felt in his adult life. paralysing, nauseating dread. she was dead. there was no excuse why starclan should allow this.
rook stumbled forward, memories flashing in front of his inner eye, indistinct smudges of fur slowly filling with colour. he'd thought his last tie to his 'family' had died alongside his father. a kit left to fend for themselves wouldnt survive. so how.
how was any of this possible.
it simply couldnt be.
"why are you here?" he snapped back, surprising even himself with the venom he was spitting whilst feeling the smallest he had in a long long while.
The oriental could almost make out the fierce lines of emotions on the Enforcer's face. But Mudslide paid no mind to them. Rookfire's retort was snappier than she expected however, and she gained a veil of confusion to her face. In the dark, Mudslide was almost certain she wasn't seen, so she didn't bother keeping up a neutral front. Her emotions blotched together like old and cracked ink, her facial muscles finding the sudden movement both liberating and full of ache. Mudslide had nearly forgotten how to emote entirely, and now here she was, knitting her brows and looking at Rookfire.
The she-cat gave a lash of her tail. "I-" She paused, her words coming up short and swallowed by the tempest of wind and rain. What was she supposed to say to that? Rookfire already knew too much, clearly. There was no way he hadn't seen Riversong ghosting around, she'd heard his cries and yelps for heaven's sake.
Mudslide could only infer he was startled by his surroundings, his exclamations a sign of his pure confusion and discomfort. But... Why was he asking why she was here? Was it common for medics (former or current) to get sucked into the minds of others? Sharing the terrors of another every night? Had he seen Riversong before. That didn't matter. Squeaks was here somewhere, she had to be.
So, the warrior merely sneered, emotion spilling onto her face. "Don't get involved." If he knew what was good for him, he'd stay back, maybe close his eyes and wake up at some point. This was something she had to face, she didn't need any odd cat coming with her. "Awake." The she-cat rasped, rain streaming onto her coat, making her pelt appear darker than it actually was. Not like that mattered, it was already dark enough there, the only light offered by the startle of lightning.
Without another word, Mudslide marched forward... Or what she assumed was forward. She could feel it all coming back to her in nauseating waves. Her mother's paws steps in the mud, how the rain swallowed up the prints and washed them away. Her sister was gone. Her father, while a coward, was gone, and her mother never bothered coming back. Why would she? But of course, she came back now, to torment her, just like all those wonderful past times.
Mudslide remembered the taste of dirt within her jaws gaining familiarity, the stench of copper, the eerie hug of rot. She remembered slipping on muddy ground, crying so harshly her head splintered in headaches. Her whole world. Gone. Dark. Meaningless. After one night. One night after a day she would've considered normal. She faintly remembered her thoughts before she drifted of to sleep, needy paws reaching for her older sister, lips curled to whisper promises. "Bugs... Beetles? Please?" But they fell silently, uselessly.
Mudslide blinked away tears, or at least that's what she thought they were. It was hard to tell with the harsh rain and the overwhelming smell of blood in the air. It was just like that night. That terrible horrifying night when she realized, come dawn, she was alone. Nocat was there to anchor her. Nocat was there to save her. She'd been too different, too anxious, too small. And now she had to pay.
She wanted to curse. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry.
She was right back were she started, looking aimlessly for her sister all over again.
Suddenly, the ground slopped. Mudslide slipped, her sudden downward pull threatening a hoarse yelp, but she swallowed it down like the saliva in her throat, like the pain in her eyes. She shielded her fall, keeping her face from the wreched mud, spreading her long legs into a more even stance. But that didn't mean she could feel the ache in her bones from the sudden crash, the mud and rain weighing down her pelt.
She shook herself, legs quaking as she slowly stood, slouched and looking up to the starless sky. What if she couldn't find her? What if she was stuck here, truly stuck here? A cat shambled to her mother like she had been all these moons. And on top of that, truly it was her favorite part, she'd have a one cat audience to watch it all go down.
It was almost laughable, but Mudslide couldn't find the strength to even laugh for her own amusement. She'd only shared a few conversations with Rookfire. She considered him chatty, somewhat annoying, but not terrible. She remembered how odd it felt looking at him. His eyes were too silver, they looked too much like her mother's, like her father's, and it scared her. Looking at him was like looking at what she should've been. Dark pelted and confident.
Mudslide used to have a darker pelt, but it lightened up as she aged, separating her farther and farther from the dark pelts of her family, prompting more states and snide comments. She couldn't remember what Squeaks looked like, merely her warmth, but she figured her pelt was dark like her's used to be. A dark blue, maybe brown, devoid of spots or ombres.
Rookfire had the privilege of being invisible. Mudslide was never so fortunate. She was cursed the moment she opened her eyes, left for nothing, born for nothing. And the only thing she could think to care about was ripped away from her.
Mudslide slowly looked back to the ground, her emotions too much. She breathed heavily, unevenly, body inching closer and closer to the ground. She pressed her forehead to the slick surface beneath her paws, her whole body trembling. She wrapped her tail around herself and squeezed her eyes shut.
She knew it was childish. She knew. But... It was all too much. The memories that resurfaced had never truly been buried, but never had she had to face them in such a physical visual form. It was torture. She couldn't help but break.
rookfires mind, still clouded by whatever riversong had sent on him, blinked at mudslide as she ordered him to not get involved. who was she to tell him to not get involved?! who was she to send him to wake up. he wouldve liked to. to simply disappear and pretend this never happened.
but it did. he had seen his mother for the first time in almost twenty moons and curse the stars he couldnt just move on from this without at least a bit of additional baggage resting heavy on his back.
"the hell you mean dont get involved?! thats my stardamned mother!" rookfire snapped back, blackened teeth bared as annoyance mixed with the overall anger from seeing his mother around. it was sort of like a spell being broken, the anxiety had disappeared with his lashing out at mudslide, leaving only rage.
he practically stomped after mudslide, the mud covering the forest floor so thick it felt like he was being swallowed whole all over again. from the outside this time, rather than it penetrating every part of his insides. the enforcer shuddered, pausing briefly to gag and retch, more thick black goo dripping from his opened maw.
"you cant just walk away" he croaked angrily, steps speeding up. the slop slop slop of the ground and the rumble of thunder and lashing wind everything heard between the two for a moment. paws muddied and already dark fur stained black and brown he pushed himself in front of the warrior.
[ i forgor. and then i remember. short reply cuz rook is head empty @Marigoldwhisper ]
__________________
✮" in all timelines, in all possibilities,.. only you. "✮
think yourself a hero [p]
