Rabbitpaw's Diary! ( Top secret! Do not look! )

[Dolomedes]

November Gathering

Dear Diary, today ( or I guess last night ) was the gathering! And as always it was super cold, and I saw Wolfpaw, and I guess I didn’t really think about it and offered to be a wind breaker for him. And to my surprise he did so!! I’m happy! I know I shouldn’t be too friendly, but I feel like maybe as medicine cats we should be on friendlier terms with each other, because we are the only cats to understand each others roles and stress. Our job and promise to to heal the wounds of others, and I think we could learn from each other for that. No one wants to see another cat die if they can do something about it, within reason of course, and so I don’t see harm in helping when we can. But just to be clear, I wouldn’t be harming Windclan for these relations, it would be a benefit for the both, or benefit for windclan, and if not I do not want to waste time in them.

Maybe I'll bring up the thought to Miss Lightningstorm. Though she seems polite, I don't see her approving the idea, but I feel like I don't know where well enough to really know. Maybe I'll talk the idea out with dad first, he'll know if it's nonsensical or not! Well, I better get going with that, bye bye for now diary!

[Dolomedes]

Leafbare

I've been... sad lately. It's a different kind of sad, I'm not sure how to properly explain it and I haven't talked to anyone about it because of how silly it is. I just... feel distant from most cats. I've been busy sure, but I've been busy my entire life, its just that recently... or since my new role, I've felt separated from the life I had before. It feels different. And I'm not sure why it feels different. I'm happy being a medicine cat apprentice, I am happy with this role and I wouldn't change it for the world but I feel like I'm different from before. That people don't look at me the same, or rather, I don't look at others the same? No, that's not right. I think I don't think of myself the same and its making me read into everything more. I don't know, I just don't like it. I just want it to go away.