Stagheart almost winced at hearing the sharper edge in Willowpaw's tone. Alright, so his attempt to brush off Weepingpaw's comment so that she wouldn't worry hadn't gone well. He wasn't exactly the best at handling these sorts of situations. Way to go, champ. Normally he wouldn't care too much on how his tone was perceived by a Clanmate, but he had an undeniable soft spot for his little apprentice, and certainly didn't want to make her too upset over something that he felt so bad about.
Internally cursing his shortfalls, the large tom finally made it up, seeing Willowpaw clearly turned away from the water and looking... angry. A rare look for the otherwise happy-go-lucky she-cat.
He let out a small huff, looking hesitant for a moment before he cleared his throat and decided not to acknowledge it for now, in case... well, in case he made it worse, really. Words weren't his strong suit.
"Hey, so... this is the shallowest part of the river. Can hardly feel the current — a 4 moon old kit could stand in it if they wanted," he explained as lightly as possible, padding over to the water and flicking it with his tail. "We can start just by havin' ya stand in it, get used to how the water feels... it only comes up a little above the paws right here... 'n then maybe see about catchin' some of the minnows that swim 'round here for practice."
He glanced back at her, trying not to frown too much as he watched her angrily swipe at a pebble, a mix of frustrated emotions on her face. Weepingpaw's voice rang in his ears: 'she was screaming about water'... But was it all water? Could she handle just a dip of her paws...? He kept his musings to himself, not wanting to look too concerned at the moment. He'd just have to see how she reacted even to the shallow water, and then... go from there, he supposed. And just silently pray he wasn't handling this as awful as he could be. It didn't exactly feel right to call her out for what her brother had told him, but at the same time, depending on how this went... he might need to mention it.
Willowpaw turned her attention to her mentor, padding over and staying a bit away from the edge. Her eyes filled with worry and not so well hidden fear as she looked at the rushing waves ahead. "Just... just standing in it... no getting swept away this time!" Willowpaw purred, her tone playful and bright, though her shaking whiskers and fearful gaze said otherwise. "Just... just standing.." Willowpaw whispered to herself, "Some minnows... yeah...." Willowpaw mewed, blinking nervously. It's just water Willowpaw, you can do it! She tried to encourage herself, Willowpaw dipped her paw into the water, the gently splashing over her paws as she stood, she gently waded farther in until she was were her mentor had told her to be. Willowpaw felt the water rushing through her fur, the memories of the water flooding over her head, not being able to control her paws.... it all rushed back into her mind, making her eyes widen in pure terror, she rushed out of the water and tried to play it off, "Oh! It's uhmm.. it's so cold!" Willowpaw purred, wincing at her wavering tone.
__________________
Oceanstar is the leader of Beachclan!
"You did a great job today and I hope you smile a little by thinking about me at the end of the day" -Kim Hongjoong
Willowpaw turned her attention to her mentor, padding over and staying a bit away from the edge. Her eyes filled with worry and not so well hidden fear as she looked at the rushing waves ahead. "Just... just standing in it... no getting swept away this time!" Willowpaw purred, her tone playful and bright, though her shaking whiskers and fearful gaze said otherwise. "Just... just standing.." Willowpaw whispered to herself, "Some minnows... yeah...." Willowpaw mewed, blinking nervously. It's just water Willowpaw, you can do it! She tried to encourage herself, Willowpaw dipped her paw into the water, the gently splashing over her paws as she stood, she gently waded farther in until she was were her mentor had told her to be. Willowpaw felt the water rushing through her fur, the memories of the water flooding over her head, not being able to control her paws.... it all rushed back into her mind, making her eyes widen in pure terror, she rushed out of the water and tried to play it off, "Oh! It's uhmm.. it's so cold!" Willowpaw purred, wincing at her wavering tone.
Stagheart's eyes softened and he let out a small sigh before padding over to his apprentice, reaching out to touch his tail to her shoulder in a small act of comfort. Willowpaw was doing her best to cover up her reactions, but the terror was written quite clearly over her features, even some fear-scent lingering in the air. So it was as bad as he'd dreaded... poor kid.
"Hey... come sit down," he meowed, guiding her to sit sort of near the water but not too close; just enough that they could hear the normally-comforting sound of the light current and the water lapping at the shore. When she settled, his piercing blue eyes studied her for a moment, hesitating. What should he say? He wasn't great at this. After taking in a deeper breath, he met his apprentice's blue eyes, his gruff tone as oddly gentle as it could be.
"Look, I... I know you're scared. I can tell... and it's alright," he added quickly, not wanting her to think he was disappointed. "What you went through... it would scare anyone. And that don't always just go away. Trust me, I know it."
He sighed again and glanced away for a moment in thought before looking back at her, carefully choosing his words so as not to make the realization too daunting for her. "Look, I know you were dreamin'... or nightmarin', really, about drownin' in water last night. You don't gotta hide it, Willowpaw... there ain't no shame in it. Just tell me what you're feelin' ''n thinkin' 'bout all of this, 'n we can go from there..."
__________________
*despite everything, it's still you.
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she and Cobwebfern have a semi-closed den policy.
Stagheart's eyes softened and he let out a small sigh before padding over to his apprentice, reaching out to touch his tail to her shoulder in a small act of comfort. Willowpaw was doing her best to cover up her reactions, but the terror was written quite clearly over her features, even some fear-scent lingering in the air. So it was as bad as he'd dreaded... poor kid.
"Hey... come sit down," he meowed, guiding her to sit sort of near the water but not too close; just enough that they could hear the normally-comforting sound of the light current and the water lapping at the shore. When she settled, his piercing blue eyes studied her for a moment, hesitating. What should he say? He wasn't great at this. After taking in a deeper breath, he met his apprentice's blue eyes, his gruff tone as oddly gentle as it could be.
"Look, I... I know you're scared. I can tell... and it's alright," he added quickly, not wanting her to think he was disappointed. "What you went through... it would scare anyone. And that don't always just go away. Trust me, I know it."
He sighed again and glanced away for a moment in thought before looking back at her, carefully choosing his words so as not to make the realization too daunting for her. "Look, I know you were dreamin'... or nightmarin', really, about drownin' in water last night. You don't gotta hide it, Willowpaw... there ain't no shame in it. Just tell me what you're feelin' ''n thinkin' 'bout all of this, 'n we can go from there..."
Willowpaw looked at her mentor, eyes rounding with nervousness as she padded to him and sat. Blinking and not able to meet his eyes until he looked directly at her. Her blue eyes gleamed against the light as she listened to him, so Weepingpaw had noticed and told her mentor. Not exactly unexpected. Willowpaw assumed. Willowpaw looked at her mentor, as her secret was revealed, she felt internally revealed. "I..." Willowpaw mewed, swallowing a lump back into her throat as she tried to keep her voice normal. "I just...... I... everytime the water hits my paws.... I'm ok, but as soon as the water tugs at my paws I just.... I just get reminded that the last time I felt the tug I got sweapt down..... and I... just in the moment..... I thought about Weepingpaw, and my family... I don't want to lose them.... and losing them to drowning would not be only a sad way out, it would make me feel bad. eternally sense I... can't exactly be forgiven while dead.. or rather apologize." Willowpaw meowed. Her tone shaking no matter how hard she tried to stop it, Willowpaw gulped nervously, wondering if her mentor would think shes wise for being cautious, or foolish for fearing something she should be accustom to. Willowpaw looked up at her mentor for a moment, blinking and looking away. "I....I don't know how I feel, I do but I don't and... it's confusing." Willowpaw meowed
__________________
Oceanstar is the leader of Beachclan!
"You did a great job today and I hope you smile a little by thinking about me at the end of the day" -Kim Hongjoong
Willowpaw looked at her mentor, eyes rounding with nervousness as she padded to him and sat. Blinking and not able to meet his eyes until he looked directly at her. Her blue eyes gleamed against the light as she listened to him, so Weepingpaw had noticed and told her mentor. Not exactly unexpected. Willowpaw assumed. Willowpaw looked at her mentor, as her secret was revealed, she felt internally revealed. "I..." Willowpaw mewed, swallowing a lump back into her throat as she tried to keep her voice normal. "I just...... I... everytime the water hits my paws.... I'm ok, but as soon as the water tugs at my paws I just.... I just get reminded that the last time I felt the tug I got sweapt down..... and I... just in the moment..... I thought about Weepingpaw, and my family... I don't want to lose them.... and losing them to drowning would not be only a sad way out, it would make me feel bad. eternally sense I... can't exactly be forgiven while dead.. or rather apologize." Willowpaw meowed. Her tone shaking no matter how hard she tried to stop it, Willowpaw gulped nervously, wondering if her mentor would think shes wise for being cautious, or foolish for fearing something she should be accustom to. Willowpaw looked up at her mentor for a moment, blinking and looking away. "I....I don't know how I feel, I do but I don't and... it's confusing." Willowpaw meowed
Stagheart's heart ached even further as he stayed quiet, carefully watching his apprentice's facial expressions as she grew more and more somber and shaky, her fear finally being revealed, her concerns finally being uttered... and it was even deeper than she thought. Her mind was so young to be contemplating things like that, and yet it was so close to happening that he couldn't blame her for the existentialism of near-death. When she finished, he shook his head slowly, his voice quiet.
"Stars, Willowpaw..." He sighed solemnly, meeting her gaze with an understanding and sympathetic look. "That's... a lot to deal with all on your own. Why didn't ya tell me?"
Then he let out a huff immediately after, shaking his head again to himself. "Nah, I know why, just... I'm sorry, kid. I wish I woulda realized how bad it was," he meowed, his blue eyes softened as he tried to meet her gaze. "Listen... as long as I'm here 'n spottin' ya, I'll make sure nothin' like that happens to ya ever again, alright? We're gonna teach you how to swim so you ain't ever gotta worry 'bout that... but we can take it as slow as you need. So long as I'm here, you're safe in the water, okay?"
Whether he'd block her from falling (and better this time), or have to catch her all over again, it didn't matter — he wouldn't let his apprentice drown, not on his watch. Even if they simply spent a session standing in the water to get her more used to it, he'd do that.
__________________
*despite everything, it's still you.
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she and Cobwebfern have a semi-closed den policy.
Stagheart's heart ached even further as he stayed quiet, carefully watching his apprentice's facial expressions as she grew more and more somber and shaky, her fear finally being revealed, her concerns finally being uttered... and it was even deeper than she thought. Her mind was so young to be contemplating things like that, and yet it was so close to happening that he couldn't blame her for the existentialism of near-death. When she finished, he shook his head slowly, his voice quiet.
"Stars, Willowpaw..." He sighed solemnly, meeting her gaze with an understanding and sympathetic look. "That's... a lot to deal with all on your own. Why didn't ya tell me?"
Then he let out a huff immediately after, shaking his head again to himself. "Nah, I know why, just... I'm sorry, kid. I wish I woulda realized how bad it was," he meowed, his blue eyes softened as he tried to meet her gaze. "Listen... as long as I'm here 'n spottin' ya, I'll make sure nothin' like that happens to ya ever again, alright? We're gonna teach you how to swim so you ain't ever gotta worry 'bout that... but we can take it as slow as you need. So long as I'm here, you're safe in the water, okay?"
Whether he'd block her from falling (and better this time), or have to catch her all over again, it didn't matter — he wouldn't let his apprentice drown, not on his watch. Even if they simply spent a session standing in the water to get her more used to it, he'd do that.
Willowpaw remained a bit shaky after her secret. Willowpaw's blue eyes were kept rounded, "Alright" She whispered, her mew so gentle and barely audiable. Willowpaw looked up to her mentor finally, her eyes wide and apologetic. "I was scared... that you were going to think badly about my skills... because a Riverclan cat shouldn't be scared of water..... Summerbird even said I was scared because I'm half Windclan....a-and that I should just go back to the moors." Willowpaw sniffled, trying to hold back her tears but failing. "I'm just scared.... I don't wanna drown.... I wanna be a Riverclan warrior, I'm Riverclan... I don't w-want other cats to see me only for my Windclan side..." Willowpaw mewed. Lowering her gaze again in shame.
__________________
Oceanstar is the leader of Beachclan!
"You did a great job today and I hope you smile a little by thinking about me at the end of the day" -Kim Hongjoong
Willowpaw remained a bit shaky after her secret. Willowpaw's blue eyes were kept rounded, "Alright" She whispered, her mew so gentle and barely audiable. Willowpaw looked up to her mentor finally, her eyes wide and apologetic. "I was scared... that you were going to think badly about my skills... because a Riverclan cat shouldn't be scared of water..... Summerbird even said I was scared because I'm half Windclan....a-and that I should just go back to the moors." Willowpaw sniffled, trying to hold back her tears but failing. "I'm just scared.... I don't wanna drown.... I wanna be a Riverclan warrior, I'm Riverclan... I don't w-want other cats to see me only for my Windclan side..." Willowpaw mewed. Lowering her gaze again in shame.
Stagheart shook his head at her thought that he'd be disappointed in her — though he could completely understand why she'd think that (it wasn't like he was the most approachable cat, all things considered). At the mention of Summerbird's words his gaze hardened, a flash of brief resentment coloring his blues.
"Summerbird don't know what she's talkin' about," he huffed, a slight growl to his tone at the mere thought of someone saying that to his apprentice. "Don't listen to her, or anyone else who tells you that you ain't RiverClan, y'hear?"
But he took in a breath to calm down from the spark of righteous anger on her behalf at her next words, his tone and gaze softening once more. She was crying, practically trembling, and he could only sadly watch while brushing his tail over her shoulder in an act of comfort. He wasn't the most physically affectionate, but he could tell she needed it now.
"Hey... look at me, kid," he urged gently, trying to get her attention from her lowered gaze. "You are RiverClan... havin' fears or setback don't make you any more or less part of us. Y'hearin' me? We don't see you as anythin' but us. That's who ya are. You're gonna learn to swim, as long as it takes, but even without swimmin' you'd still be RiverClan... got it?"
His words were a mix of firm yet gentle, trying to get her to understand while also being kind for her sake. He didn't want anyone going around telling her she was anything less... he had the right mind to whack Summerbird's ears himself for saying those things, though he kept those thoughts to himself for now.
__________________
*despite everything, it's still you.
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she and Cobwebfern have a semi-closed den policy.
Stagheart shook his head at her thought that he'd be disappointed in her — though he could completely understand why she'd think that (it wasn't like he was the most approachable cat, all things considered). At the mention of Summerbird's words his gaze hardened, a flash of brief resentment coloring his blues.
"Summerbird don't know what she's talkin' about," he huffed, a slight growl to his tone at the mere thought of someone saying that to his apprentice. "Don't listen to her, or anyone else who tells you that you ain't RiverClan, y'hear?"
But he took in a breath to calm down from the spark of righteous anger on her behalf at her next words, his tone and gaze softening once more. She was crying, practically trembling, and he could only sadly watch while brushing his tail over her shoulder in an act of comfort. He wasn't the most physically affectionate, but he could tell she needed it now.
"Hey... look at me, kid," he urged gently, trying to get her attention from her lowered gaze. "You are RiverClan... havin' fears or setback don't make you any more or less part of us. Y'hearin' me? We don't see you as anythin' but us. That's who ya are. You're gonna learn to swim, as long as it takes, but even without swimmin' you'd still be RiverClan... got it?"
His words were a mix of firm yet gentle, trying to get her to understand while also being kind for her sake. He didn't want anyone going around telling her she was anything less... he had the right mind to whack Summerbird's ears himself for saying those things, though he kept those thoughts to himself for now.
Willowpaw sniffled, blinking her tears away for a moment before a few more fell, as she felt her mentors tail brushing her shoulder, she scooted closer to him and put his head on his shoulder. Her usual for comfort. Willowpaw sniffled again. "I w-wish my own clanmates w-would treat me better..... I-i'm only ever nice" Willowpaw sniffled.
__________________
Oceanstar is the leader of Beachclan!
"You did a great job today and I hope you smile a little by thinking about me at the end of the day" -Kim Hongjoong
Willowpaw sniffled, blinking her tears away for a moment before a few more fell, as she felt her mentors tail brushing her shoulder, she scooted closer to him and put his head on his shoulder. Her usual for comfort. Willowpaw sniffled again. "I w-wish my own clanmates w-would treat me better..... I-i'm only ever nice" Willowpaw sniffled.
Stagheart let her scoot closer and rest her small head on his broad shoulder, nodding slowly to her words. "I know.. it ain't fair. None of it," he agreed in a low, remorseful voice. "The world don't care if you're kind or not... sometimes, it can just be cruel. But that don't mean you let 'em tear you down, alright...? You keep goin', you get back up 'n keep your heart... 'cause a few bad cats sayin' some awful things don't make them true."
Poor Willowpaw... it was a very similar issue that Berrypaw had, the young medicine cat often plagued by doubts and criticisms for her outsider heritage (and the fact she had failed at being a warrior apprentice before being promoted to medicine cat). So needless to say, he'd dealt with these issues before... and it ached his heart to see another young cat he was soft-hearted over going through it.
__________________
*despite everything, it's still you.
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she and Cobwebfern have a semi-closed den policy.
Stagheart let her scoot closer and rest her small head on his broad shoulder, nodding slowly to her words. "I know.. it ain't fair. None of it," he agreed in a low, remorseful voice. "The world don't care if you're kind or not... sometimes, it can just be cruel. But that don't mean you let 'em tear you down, alright...? You keep goin', you get back up 'n keep your heart... 'cause a few bad cats sayin' some awful things don't make them true."
Poor Willowpaw... it was a very similar issue that Berrypaw had, the young medicine cat often plagued by doubts and criticisms for her outsider heritage (and the fact she had failed at being a warrior apprentice before being promoted to medicine cat). So needless to say, he'd dealt with these issues before... and it ached his heart to see another young cat he was soft-hearted over going through it.
Willowpaw sniffed gently. Her head still resting on his shoulder as she gave a small murmur. "I usually am good at ignoring it.... but with the whole water thing I've just become.... more open to my emotions lately. I usually never noticed stuff like that." Willowpaw mewed. Looking up to her mentor. "Promise me it'll get better? I don't want to live being picked at and made fun of." She sniffled
__________________
Oceanstar is the leader of Beachclan!
"You did a great job today and I hope you smile a little by thinking about me at the end of the day" -Kim Hongjoong
Willowpaw sniffed gently. Her head still resting on his shoulder as she gave a small murmur. "I usually am good at ignoring it.... but with the whole water thing I've just become.... more open to my emotions lately. I usually never noticed stuff like that." Willowpaw mewed. Looking up to her mentor. "Promise me it'll get better? I don't want to live being picked at and made fun of." She sniffled
Stagheart hesitated at her last words, sympathy tugging in his chest. He wanted to tell her it'd get better, that she'd soon have nothing to worry about, but... it just simply wasn't true. At least, not that he could predict.
He let out a long sigh, shifting his weight on his haunches for a moment as he stalled replying. After a pause, he glanced down at her, his voice low and rumbly. "I... can't promise that, kid," he admitted ruefully. "Cats can be mean for no good reason, no matter how old or capable you are... but what I can promise, or at least believe, is that you'll just get tougher 'n stronger," he explained, attempting to convey some hope in his gruff tones.
"You'll keep growin' 'n learnin', 'n someday, the things they say might bother you less. Or not at all. You just gotta keep goin', keep pushin'... 'n not let it get to ya too much. That's 'bout all we can do..."
__________________
*despite everything, it's still you.
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat!
she and Cobwebfern have a semi-closed den policy.
Re: Willowpaw's Training! [p]
Berryshine is RiverClan's medicine cat! 