does the moon sink in your fur; are the daffodils talking again?

[wolfie]

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ [ COWTUFT ‼ ] ˚｡⋆ ༘˚✧

┆彡 THE MARTYR

| DARK FOREST RESIDENT | 28 MOONS (AT DEATH) ✮✮✮

✩｡°°｡✩ he . . him ➔ massive white tom with black splotches and floppy ears. scars cover his neck. x-marks on his shoulders and his left hindleg is covered in burn scars

╭₊˚purrks﹕monkey's paw, the collector, herb knowledge, kitty softpaws ₊˚੭
✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

⌦ .｡.:* ✮ @Estelle
Paws stepped completely silent on the rotten grass, floppy ears swiveling to the eerily sounds around him. He had not wandered these plains without running. There had always been someone behind his back. He spent his time within the soil. In the darkness. An awful place indeed with sneering grins. There was no light. There were no life. Only cruel whispers. Flickerlight's ominous disappearance did not put Cowtuft at ease.

Alas, he was a determined medicine cat with a singular wish. To fix what had been broken. Albeit, he hadn't planned for the fact the majority of cats here struggled to understand him. He also hadn't planned for the fact he couldn't recognize anyone. At least, within WindClan he had gained familiar with specific features whether it be a feather or a scent -- it clung to certain clanmates. Within this realm.. the void was amass. Stars, he needed a breakthrough.

"Psspspsps..? Psspspsps... Psstttpspspss...pssst..." The martyr cooed out to the darkness, content with using a simple noise to attract anyone nearby. He had heard whispers in the shadows about a StarClanner on this side of the barrier. Ginger,, or .. was it.. giggle.. Starsdammit. Cowtuft had believed them but .. as time seemed to tick on, his doubt increased by tenfold. This could not be a lost cause, could it? They would repair this. Someone would.

"Pssppsps.... Pssspsppspssps.... Psst,, Psps?" And he was met with silence. He let out a groan, walking to the nearby crooked tree to gently slam his forehead against it. Maybe if he knocked his head around he'll figure out the solution. Maybe he didn't even need a StarClanner. They hadn't done much, anyway, besides betraying WindClan. All the suffering they stood by to.

[Estelle]

Pspsps.

Pspspsps.

The sound tickled his ear.

It penetrated and disturbed.

A hollow grunt left the tom when his head lifted from the ground.

It had been moons, now that the starry-pelted tom resided on the dark side of the border. Moons, now, that he lamented his failures and his death, and punished himself to eternal misery. Punished himself from never walking among the stars like those who truly deserved it, banished himself here where his body had grown weary and thin, his face looked askance. Tired. Hollow. Such a miserable state for a former leader, for one who was meant to lead a clan once upon a time. But he blamed himself, and Gingerfrost always had been an emotional man. Always had been unable to handle his own feelings. This was his way of coping with his mistakes; self-destructive and shameful.

Pspsps.

But the sound wouldn't let him sleep. The sound kept him awake, as a resident of the forest must be looking for its next prey. He had had his fair share of scuffles in this place, with those who wanted to send the starry-furred cat back to the other side; funny how he fought to keep living in his self-exile. Green eyes glinted as he rose his brows, emerging from the bushes with slow, languid steps. He didn't bother hiding his presence as he appeared to Cowtuft's gaze, he only looked on silently.

How surprising.
"I wouldn't have expected for the WindClan medicine cat to end up here."
He mulled. Cowtuft had always seemed soft-hearted; WindClan in general was that, unless you angered them. Call it a hunch, and hadn't anticipated to see the medic here, or looking for anyone, for that matter. Gingerfrost twitched his whiskers. Most cats knew this area as the dweller's realm.
"What brings you to this part of the forest?"
Maybe he was being cautious as he stalked over, a glint of curiosity to his tone.

It had been so long since he had shared words with another. So long since he moved from his single spot, wasting away. The only thing that had him moving as of late... He couldn't ignore it, the strength of the Dark Forest weighing him down while he felt his own stability as a StarClanner weaken. A part of him felt responsible. Was that why Cowtuft was here?


[ @wolfie - Cowtuft ]

[wolfie]

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ [ COWTUFT ‼ ] ˚｡⋆ ༘˚✧
┆彡 THE MARTYR | DARK FOREST RESIDENT | 28 MOONS (AT DEATH) | he . him ✮✮✮

[ massive white tom with black splotches that are plastered across his thick, fluffy & feathery fur. a long, jagged scar covers his neck and he has x-scars on his shoulders. his left hindleg is covered in burn scars and he walks with a severe limp due to it. he has a right, vivid green eye and a striking left blue eye. his ears are floppy and he speaks in a high-pitched, soft & drawled out tone of voice. he smells strongly of floral & herbs with a strong hint of mint. ]

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

⌦ .｡.:* ✮ @Estelle
--- ⁀➴ Oh, how weary Cowtuft had grown. He could swear he could cry but his eyes seemed to be going through a drought. Alas, all he did was for Lightningstorm — WindClan. StarClan may have abandoned them, but he would drag them by their scruffs if he had to. He took in a deep, shuddering breath. Oh, how he did not understand how his life had led to this. He used to had such a clear view on the world. Trust within their ancestors. Trust within himself. Mismatched irises fluttered close, but eventually he takes a step back.

Floppy ears lifted up at the sounds of approaching pawsteps from behind him. He sucked in a sharp breath, heart beginning to thump against his chest. Aaa, he had traveled so far. It would be a shame to be killed once more and have to travel again. The medicine cat turned to face the stranger. And oh, ooh how long had it been since someone had known him. It does not stop the guilt nor the shame from pouring over Cowtuft's shoulders like a rushing waterfall, face crumbling with an expression of hurt.

His eyes soften, and he hangs his head low; averting his gaze. "..that.. is a title.. I have long since lost.. the right to.." He gestures with his paws slowly, using the rest of his body in an attempt to convey his message in the most simplest way for the cat in front of him to understand.

Eventually, mismatched irises drag up to take in who stood in front of him. True recognition would never come but the stars that danced in the feline's pelt was all he needed. The other appeared haggard, light having dimmed. Oh. How this cat seemed to carry so much pain on their shoulders. Cowtuft's tail curls around his injured hindleg, a brief moment of silence stretching between them.

"You, " He gestures to Ginger - Giggles? .. They appeared to be more of a ginger. He tilts his head to the side, eyebrows creasing together slightly. He couldn't recall the last StarClanner he had met. The one who had given his full name, perhaps. "The darkness .. is growing... while the light weakens.. The clans will suffer.. if the balance is not restored,, I .. wish to save my .. friends and family .. from the chaos.. that may come.. " He tilts his head to the other side, "Do .. you know.. how to accomplish ..this?" A hope. His singular hope. If Cowtuft found no answers here, he would have to cry to the otherwordly. Perhaps they would take pity on his desperateness.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦
╭₊˚ *ೃ༄ monkey's paw 彡 the collector 彡 herb knowledge 彡 kitty softpaws *ೃ༄ ₊˚੭

[Estelle]

Quiet. That was the medic's response, paws moving to convey a message words could not. Gingerfrost, though not with a keen ability to read emotions, understood the message sent through body language and the signs Cowtuft made. It left much to be desired, a part of him aching as the hurt expression of Cowtuft's face mirrored his own.
"That... Makes two of us."
The tom mumble under a gruff breath, averting his gaze.

But the tom ought to learn that wallowing in his misery would get him nowhere. lamenting what he could not do, when his friends down below needed StarClan's aid - or at least, that's what his heart told him; his mind was convinced that they had renounced the way of the Stars, and he had done little amend that issue, if not contributed to the destruction of faith through his inaction and untimely death. His eyes closed for a moment, opening only when he heard the shuffling of moving paws.

Darkness and weakened light; an imbalance of power... A selfless act to save friends and family. He resented that he knew precisely what Cowtuft was alluding to. He resented that the words of family and friends made his heart ache in a way he couldn't describe, but urged on his need to help. To do something. Gingerfrost was so certain he was of no value to RiverClan now, knew that none of his friends were still living there, but friends and family... Mumblepaw, Lotusheart. RiverClan as a whole. His son, his best friend, his family; the thought of them hurt his soul.

"I don't."
The words left his maw, blunt and harsh. They stung, and the moment he spoke those words regret filled his senses. His teeth were exposed as his mouth wasn't quite closed, his eyes were locked on the ground. He had been sitting in his misery for so long. Yet before him stood a Dark Forest resident seeking help his family, his friends, his clan, even beyond death. Perhaps that went to show why the clans turned to the Dark Forest more than StarClan; he wanted to turn and sleep on that thought. But he couldn't. He hesitated. Could he truly justify inaction - the very thing that turned his clan against him - as the better option? Had he not been down this road before? Gingerfrost lashed his tail; his throat felt dry.

"But maybe I can help."
He hadn't processed the thoughts when the words left his maw, but they filled him with a sense of duty. He was dead, erased from the world and likely erased from memory. But he would be no better in death than in life if he did nothing to try and fix this problem. He was terrified. Terrified of making a mistake, but he had to try. He should have acted so, so much earlier. But what a fool he was.
"I've felt the stars lose their power, the Dark Forest is growing more thick-headed by the day. Information from the other side would be invaluable to understand what is happening and what to do. But for now, what do you know?" His whiskers twitched, he glanced; "..I reckon all this may have to do with the clans' faith in StarClan, huh? Maybe we can find answers where this all started..."


[ @wolfie ]

[wolfie]

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ [ COWTUFT ‼ ] ˚｡⋆ ༘˚✧
┆彡 THE MARTYR | DARK FOREST RESIDENT | 28 MOONS (AT DEATH) | he . him ✮✮✮

[ massive white tom with black splotches that are plastered across his thick, fluffy & feathery fur. a long, jagged scar covers his neck and he has x-scars on his shoulders. his left hindleg is covered in burn scars and he walks with a severe limp due to it. he has a right, vivid green eye and a striking left blue eye. his ears are floppy and he speaks in a high-pitched, soft & drawled out tone of voice. he smells strongly of floral & herbs with a strong hint of mint. ]

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

⌦ .｡.:* ✮ @Estelle
--- ⁀➴ Floppy ears rose slightly at the shared similarity. A confession of mirrored sins. Loss of a title. His mind spins, claws peeling back fragments of memories. Blurs of gatherings. Gingerfrost? Ah, Gingerstar. Cowtuft blinks slowly, and he wants to ask a question. He knew so little of the clans these moons. Ever since his death, the darkness weighted him down heavily. He did not feel tethered; floating in the abyss.

The medicine cat exists in the stretch of silence before the tom in front of him responds again. His ears flattered at the true reality laid out. For his great effort, he supposed he did expect the worst to come. He had learnt to expect things to tumble. He had spent his moons pushing a boulder up a mountain. Cowtuft lets out a quiet sigh before ultimately replying, "I see, " which was a simple tap on his chest and left eye using his right paw. A dear shame.

Begging appeared to be his only option here.

With growing sorrow, the martyr turns to begin to leave the dweller's domain. Only to quickly spin back around when Gingerfrost (,,, did leaders keep the suffix when they were dead? He wasn't sure.) offered to help. Even in the dwelling sorrow there was light. Cowtuft smiles and practically beams, long & feathery tail swishing back and forth. "Thank you, " he signs, tapping his flat paw against his chin before pulling it away.

He tilts his head slightly to the side, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. Aw shucks, he supposed even if the other wanted to help he wouldn't gain sudden knowledge. He did agree in the waning faith. "All.. I know besides the uhm, well barrier tidbits... is the fact the StarCave recently collapsed.. Cutting off .. any communication with the living.. . " He hmm-ed quietly through his gestures, where... where.. It all happened down below. If Gingerfrost was correct it only made Cowtuft want to.. want to give the stars a good ol' bat of the ears! They were the ones who had stood idly by while his clanmates had suffered -- had died painfully and horribly. Silence when all he needed was a whisper.

He shook his head back and forth, attempting to rid himself of the pestering thoughts that buzzed about. "Perhaps... looking near the border..? I truly am at a loss here..." He confesses. He barely knew the layout of the Dark Forest much less anything to do regarding StarClan.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦
╭₊˚ *ೃ༄ monkey's paw 彡 the collector 彡 herb knowledge 彡 kitty softpaws *ೃ༄ ₊˚੭