Name: Crow
Gender: Male
Age: 24 moons
Is your character a kit or an expecting queen?: No
Reason for Joining: Exiled from ThunderClan and has nowhere else to go, also adopted by Hawkblaze
Rank Request: Apprentice
New Name Request (optional): Crowpaw
Mention Me: @Moonraven
Crow
Purrks: Heightened Perception, Agatha Kitty, and Hulk SMASH
@Rizo @Silverfur & Co
TW: Mild Anxiety
Doing as he was told was no unfamiliar task to the young tom. Sitting down between Hawkblaze and Leopardfire was easy, right? Wrong! He felt like a scared kit, hiding behind his parents to protect himself from the threats of the outside world. Only these two weren't his parents nor was Twilightstar a threat (as far as he knew, at least).
WindClan's moors were pretty... empty. He had never seen their territory before, then again... he's never been anywhere near WindClan except when he had to do a border tour back when he still had a mentor in ThunderClan. The weather was nice at least. That had to have been a plus, right? But that was the only positive thought the young tom could muster. Being in an unfamiliar land was no strange feeling, but the fear it caused always seemed to think it was welcome in his mind. He had no idea who his enemies were here, nor did he really even know his allies (he knew them, but only on the surface).
Seeing the scarred gray she-cat at a closer glance made the experience even more daunting. He hadn't seen her in who knows how many moons? What would the old leader even do and say? How would she react to seeing ThunderClan's former leader's son, exiled and afraid of just about everyone? Would she turn him away? Hawkblaze said she was fair, but I don't even know what fair is anymore. Bumblestar never thought to hear my side of the story Redhawk spilled.
As the gray she-cat continued to walk toward them, Crowpaw could only cower in fear. His pelt shook a few times, but the young tabby tom refused to let it shake more. It felt like everything stopped once Twilightstar spoke of her Clanmates and him, all while she had her one eye on him as if he was going to attack her or something. She knew he was from ThunderClan. Right. Of course, Twilightstar recognizes my old Clan, why wouldn't she? I'm only the son of the most pathetic past leader known to all the Clans. Crow fought to refrain his eyes from rolling. He did not want to let the WindClan leader think he was being rude in any way.
"Uh- I... um... I- I've t-told H-hawkb-blaze and- a-and Leopardfire w-why I've... come toward's W-windClan's border. T-they... s-said y-you'd be willing t-to hear me out. O-or at least... be fair."ThunderClan. She thinks I'm still in ThunderClan. Has Bumblestar not even given me the decency to mention she's exiled me? Have I meant that little to ThunderClan to not even get... my exile acknowledged in their Gatherings?
I've truly meant nothing to them. I was just a useless clump of fur. Crow looked down to hide away the tears that slowly began to stream down his face. That was his home for so long, he was born and raised a ThunderClanner. And they never treated him right. He looked pathetic, didn't he? Crying in front of a leader he's never met about an old home that never cared to know him. She didn't know it, of course. He didn't even know if Hawkblaze or Leopardfire would even keep their promises.
How many leaps of faith did he take? How many of those leaps ended in failure? Even after being captured by that outsider who went by the same name as Crow, he couldn't even step into some other territory without quadruple-checking that he wouldn't end up in a worse position than before. No one knew of that piece of his history, nor would they until he was comfortable enough around them. Crow hadn't eaten in days-- perhaps that would be his first stop after he's taken a long nap (if he's accepted into the Clan).
__________________
Characters
Crow (Purrks: Heightened Perception, Agatha Kitty, Hulk SMASH, Dreamwalker)
Ravenhawk
Joy flashed through amber orbs as Hawkblaze saw his esteemed leader come into view, and he dipped his head low in respect. He cringed slightly at his leader's tone. I guess a lot has happened in our absence...
Sitting back up straight, he opened his mouth to respond, but caught himself as Crow started to speak. He placed a stocky paw gently on the young tom's shoulder, a gesture of comfort.
Clearing his throat, Hawkblaze nodded in affirmation at what Crow had said. "I asked Leopardfire to accompany me on a search for my missing son, Rainshock. I haven't been the best father. I always told myself I would never be like Dusktalon, but my efforts to be opposite him lead me to be completely paws off and negligent. I went searching for him in order to atone, and asked Leopardfire to accompany me because of our close connection," he explained, flashing a lopsided smile in Leopardfire's direction. Taking a breath, he continued. "We were almost back when we ran across Crow in the outskirts. He told us his story, and it reminded me very much of my own, except unlike Crow, he didn't have you to save him from the abuse he suffered at the fangs of his blood relatives," Hawkblaze continued, reverence for his aging leader filling his voice with sincerity. Twilightstar had truly saved Hawkblaze from a fate worse than death, and he would be forever grateful.
Hawkblaze took a moment to look at the young tom sitting next to him and smiled. You deserve better than you've been dealt. I'll make sure you get it.
Without hesitation, he continued his tale. "We brought Crow to you because you have always been a fair, level-headed, and considerate leader. His clan has cast him into exile for an unintentional transgression, an extreme reaction to what could have been a teachable moment. I would like to give this young cat what he really deserves. A home, and a family."
Determination filled his gaze as he looked into Twilightstar's green eye, trying his best to show her how sincere he was about his next statement. "I would like to mentor Crow in Windclan, train him to be an asset to our clan, and be the father he deserves."
She strolled through the long grass and breathed in the fresh scents around her. The WindClan matriarch's thoughts were far away, she found herself struggling to grasp and process them these days. The clan's recent losses shook her to the core and had the leader more defensive and protective than ever of those who remained in her life.
Her tolerance was little to non-existent when it came to nonsense and trouble. Any sniff of trouble was often dealt with with far less tolerance and leniency than she had in the past. Her passiveness had gotten too many cats killed in the past. Now she'd rather see her cats die an honorable death on the battlefield fighting for their clan than hiding in their dens waiting for danger to bite them. If she had been more aggressive with RiverClan perhaps she'd still have Fallownose and Fernrise, and Twistedpaw wouldn't have been put through so much.
The leader's thoughts faded as the sharp scent of outsiders had her pad towards the outskirts where she found the tom sitting with two others. Twilightstar strutted closer to the border yet kept about two tail lengths from the edge. She eyed all three with cold curiosity and tensed muscles. The strange tom they had with him was familiar to her, the name however evaded her. She's seen him at the gathering, among ThunderClan.
He had been protected from StarClan's ire by a russet warrior. Twilightstar never did understand why a rock fell randomly out of the sky atop a ThunderClan cat. As it hadn't been her problem she hadn't bothered dwelling on it. As was the norm between the clans. Why stick your nose in other clans' issues when you had enough of your own.
"Hawkblaze and Leopardfire, it's been a while."The scarred feline meowed smoothly without taking her wary gaze off the stranger. "Let's hear your excuses and why you've brought a ThunderClan cat to my border." Though usually not this short with returning clanmates, Twilightstar's been dealing with a lot.
@SpiritedWarrior [Crow] @Silverfur & Co [Leopardfire]
[SPOILER="Crow"]
Quote:
Originally Posted by SpiritedWarrior
Name: Crow
Gender: Male
Age: 24 moons
Is your character a kit or an expecting queen?: No
Reason for Joining: Exiled from ThunderClan and has nowhere else to go, also adopted by Hawkblaze
Rank Request: Apprentice
New Name Request (optional): Crowpaw
Mention Me: @Moonraven
Crow
Purrks: Heightened Perception, Agatha Kitty, and Hulk SMASH
@Rizo @Silverfur & Co
TW: Mild Anxiety
Doing as he was told was no unfamiliar task to the young tom. Sitting down between Hawkblaze and Leopardfire was easy, right? Wrong! He felt like a scared kit, hiding behind his parents to protect himself from the threats of the outside world. Only these two weren't his parents nor was Twilightstar a threat (as far as he knew, at least).
WindClan's moors were pretty... empty. He had never seen their territory before, then again... he's never been anywhere near WindClan except when he had to do a border tour back when he still had a mentor in ThunderClan. The weather was nice at least. That had to have been a plus, right? But that was the only positive thought the young tom could muster. Being in an unfamiliar land was no strange feeling, but the fear it caused always seemed to think it was welcome in his mind. He had no idea who his enemies were here, nor did he really even know his allies (he knew them, but only on the surface).
Seeing the scarred gray she-cat at a closer glance made the experience even more daunting. He hadn't seen her in who knows how many moons? What would the old leader even do and say? How would she react to seeing ThunderClan's former leader's son, exiled and afraid of just about everyone? Would she turn him away? Hawkblaze said she was fair, but I don't even know what fair is anymore. Bumblestar never thought to hear my side of the story Redhawk spilled.
As the gray she-cat continued to walk toward them, Crowpaw could only cower in fear. His pelt shook a few times, but the young tabby tom refused to let it shake more. It felt like everything stopped once Twilightstar spoke of her Clanmates and him, all while she had her one eye on him as if he was going to attack her or something. She knew he was from ThunderClan. Right. Of course, Twilightstar recognizes my old Clan, why wouldn't she? I'm only the son of the most pathetic past leader known to all the Clans. Crow fought to refrain his eyes from rolling. He did not want to let the WindClan leader think he was being rude in any way.
"Uh- I... um... I- I've t-told H-hawkb-blaze and- a-and Leopardfire w-why I've... come toward's W-windClan's border. T-they... s-said y-you'd be willing t-to hear me out. O-or at least... be fair."ThunderClan. She thinks I'm still in ThunderClan. Has Bumblestar not even given me the decency to mention she's exiled me? Have I meant that little to ThunderClan to not even get... my exile acknowledged in their Gatherings?
I've truly meant nothing to them. I was just a useless clump of fur. Crow looked down to hide away the tears that slowly began to stream down his face. That was his home for so long, he was born and raised a ThunderClanner. And they never treated him right. He looked pathetic, didn't he? Crying in front of a leader he's never met about an old home that never cared to know him. She didn't know it, of course. He didn't even know if Hawkblaze or Leopardfire would even keep their promises.
How many leaps of faith did he take? How many of those leaps ended in failure? Even after being captured by that outsider who went by the same name as Crow, he couldn't even step into some other territory without quadruple-checking that he wouldn't end up in a worse position than before. No one knew of that piece of his history, nor would they until he was comfortable enough around them. Crow hadn't eaten in days-- perhaps that would be his first stop after he's taken a long nap (if he's accepted into the Clan).
/SPOILER]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rizo
HAWKBLAZE
58 Moons | He/Him | No Purrks Yet
Joy flashed through amber orbs as Hawkblaze saw his esteemed leader come into view, and he dipped his head low in respect. He cringed slightly at his leader's tone. I guess a lot has happened in our absence...
Sitting back up straight, he opened his mouth to respond, but caught himself as Crow started to speak. He placed a stocky paw gently on the young tom's shoulder, a gesture of comfort.
Clearing his throat, Hawkblaze nodded in affirmation at what Crow had said. "I asked Leopardfire to accompany me on a search for my missing son, Rainshock. I haven't been the best father. I always told myself I would never be like Dusktalon, but my efforts to be opposite him lead me to be completely paws off and negligent. I went searching for him in order to atone, and asked Leopardfire to accompany me because of our close connection," he explained, flashing a lopsided smile in Leopardfire's direction. Taking a breath, he continued. "We were almost back when we ran across Crow in the outskirts. He told us his story, and it reminded me very much of my own, except unlike Crow, he didn't have you to save him from the abuse he suffered at the fangs of his blood relatives," Hawkblaze continued, reverence for his aging leader filling his voice with sincerity. Twilightstar had truly saved Hawkblaze from a fate worse than death, and he would be forever grateful.
Hawkblaze took a moment to look at the young tom sitting next to him and smiled. You deserve better than you've been dealt. I'll make sure you get it.
Without hesitation, he continued his tale. "We brought Crow to you because you have always been a fair, level-headed, and considerate leader. His clan has cast him into exile for an unintentional transgression, an extreme reaction to what could have been a teachable moment. I would like to give this young cat what he really deserves. A home, and a family."
Determination filled his gaze as he looked into Twilightstar's green eye, trying his best to show her how sincere he was about his next statement. "I would like to mentor Crow in Windclan, train him to be an asset to our clan, and be the father he deserves."
Leopardfire noded and smiled at Hawkblaze after dipping her head to Twilightstar. " Yes Thunderclan has exiled him for a reason that should not have been exiled for. Also you are a very kind and caring leader. I have also adopted Crow. I think he would be better in windclan then anywhere else. Besides that I think that everyone should have another chance." She could tell that Twilightstar was stressed out poor leader.... She felt bad that they had been gone so long and she smiled at the leader looking her in the eyes. She wanted to help Crow and wanted to help Hawkblaze. She sat there back straight and looked at the leader she was not going to wavier on this matter.
Name: Crow
Gender: Male
Age: 24 moons
Is your character a kit or an expecting queen?: No
Reason for Joining: Exiled from ThunderClan and has nowhere else to go, also adopted by Hawkblaze
Rank Request: Apprentice
New Name Request (optional): Crowpaw
Mention Me: @Moonraven
Crow
Purrks: Heightened Perception, Agatha Kitty, and Hulk SMASH
@Rizo @Silverfur & Co
TW: Mild Anxiety
Doing as he was told was no unfamiliar task to the young tom. Sitting down between Hawkblaze and Leopardfire was easy, right? Wrong! He felt like a scared kit, hiding behind his parents to protect himself from the threats of the outside world. Only these two weren't his parents nor was Twilightstar a threat (as far as he knew, at least).
WindClan's moors were pretty... empty. He had never seen their territory before, then again... he's never been anywhere near WindClan except when he had to do a border tour back when he still had a mentor in ThunderClan. The weather was nice at least. That had to have been a plus, right? But that was the only positive thought the young tom could muster. Being in an unfamiliar land was no strange feeling, but the fear it caused always seemed to think it was welcome in his mind. He had no idea who his enemies were here, nor did he really even know his allies (he knew them, but only on the surface).
Seeing the scarred gray she-cat at a closer glance made the experience even more daunting. He hadn't seen her in who knows how many moons? What would the old leader even do and say? How would she react to seeing ThunderClan's former leader's son, exiled and afraid of just about everyone? Would she turn him away? Hawkblaze said she was fair, but I don't even know what fair is anymore. Bumblestar never thought to hear my side of the story Redhawk spilled.
As the gray she-cat continued to walk toward them, Crowpaw could only cower in fear. His pelt shook a few times, but the young tabby tom refused to let it shake more. It felt like everything stopped once Twilightstar spoke of her Clanmates and him, all while she had her one eye on him as if he was going to attack her or something. She knew he was from ThunderClan. Right. Of course, Twilightstar recognizes my old Clan, why wouldn't she? I'm only the son of the most pathetic past leader known to all the Clans. Crow fought to refrain his eyes from rolling. He did not want to let the WindClan leader think he was being rude in any way.
"Uh- I... um... I- I've t-told H-hawkb-blaze and- a-and Leopardfire w-why I've... come toward's W-windClan's border. T-they... s-said y-you'd be willing t-to hear me out. O-or at least... be fair."ThunderClan. She thinks I'm still in ThunderClan. Has Bumblestar not even given me the decency to mention she's exiled me? Have I meant that little to ThunderClan to not even get... my exile acknowledged in their Gatherings?
I've truly meant nothing to them. I was just a useless clump of fur. Crow looked down to hide away the tears that slowly began to stream down his face. That was his home for so long, he was born and raised a ThunderClanner. And they never treated him right. He looked pathetic, didn't he? Crying in front of a leader he's never met about an old home that never cared to know him. She didn't know it, of course. He didn't even know if Hawkblaze or Leopardfire would even keep their promises.
How many leaps of faith did he take? How many of those leaps ended in failure? Even after being captured by that outsider who went by the same name as Crow, he couldn't even step into some other territory without quadruple-checking that he wouldn't end up in a worse position than before. No one knew of that piece of his history, nor would they until he was comfortable enough around them. Crow hadn't eaten in days-- perhaps that would be his first stop after he's taken a long nap (if he's accepted into the Clan).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rizo
HAWKBLAZE
58 Moons | He/Him | No Purrks Yet
Joy flashed through amber orbs as Hawkblaze saw his esteemed leader come into view, and he dipped his head low in respect. He cringed slightly at his leader's tone. I guess a lot has happened in our absence...
Sitting back up straight, he opened his mouth to respond, but caught himself as Crow started to speak. He placed a stocky paw gently on the young tom's shoulder, a gesture of comfort.
Clearing his throat, Hawkblaze nodded in affirmation at what Crow had said. "I asked Leopardfire to accompany me on a search for my missing son, Rainshock. I haven't been the best father. I always told myself I would never be like Dusktalon, but my efforts to be opposite him lead me to be completely paws off and negligent. I went searching for him in order to atone, and asked Leopardfire to accompany me because of our close connection," he explained, flashing a lopsided smile in Leopardfire's direction. Taking a breath, he continued. "We were almost back when we ran across Crow in the outskirts. He told us his story, and it reminded me very much of my own, except unlike Crow, he didn't have you to save him from the abuse he suffered at the fangs of his blood relatives," Hawkblaze continued, reverence for his aging leader filling his voice with sincerity. Twilightstar had truly saved Hawkblaze from a fate worse than death, and he would be forever grateful.
Hawkblaze took a moment to look at the young tom sitting next to him and smiled. You deserve better than you've been dealt. I'll make sure you get it.
Without hesitation, he continued his tale. "We brought Crow to you because you have always been a fair, level-headed, and considerate leader. His clan has cast him into exile for an unintentional transgression, an extreme reaction to what could have been a teachable moment. I would like to give this young cat what he really deserves. A home, and a family."
Determination filled his gaze as he looked into Twilightstar's green eye, trying his best to show her how sincere he was about his next statement. "I would like to mentor Crow in Windclan, train him to be an asset to our clan, and be the father he deserves."
Leopardfire noded and smiled at Hawkblaze after dipping her head to Twilightstar. " Yes Thunderclan has exiled him for a reason that should not have been exiled for. Also you are a very kind and caring leader. I have also adopted Crow. I think he would be better in windclan then anywhere else. Besides that I think that everyone should have another chance." She could tell that Twilightstar was stressed out poor leader.... She felt bad that they had been gone so long and she smiled at the leader looking her in the eyes. She wanted to help Crow and wanted to help Hawkblaze. She sat there back straight and looked at the leader she was not going to wavier on this matter.
Twilightstar sat back on the grass and swerved her head as she listened to each cat speak. Her half-ear twitched erratically at the word fair. Fair, she's tried being fair her entire reign, and that fairness has gotten so many cats killed and WindClan trampled on. The life of a warrior was cruel and unforgiving it had no room for fairness. So whether she'd be fair or not, eh, hard to say. What's fair to her didn't need to be fair to anyone else. She'll listen and judge the cat as she deems fit that is all she was willing to do right now which was more than enough considering Hawkblaze's story.
Twilightstar was getting so very tired of hearing this excuse for cats who went missing. I needed to find my son, my daughter, my mom, my dad, my love. That's not how this worked!!! Her warriors should not be giving in to selfish impulses and running off at any chance they get. Does the Clan mean so little to them?! It would always offend her at how easily cats could toss aside the oath they swore to the clan to go on a wild rabbit chase.
Oh, Twilightstar hadn't realized that she had played such an esteemed role in Hawkblaze's growth or life. She'd feel a sense of pride and warm happiness if she knew he wasn't just saying that. Did he mean these words or were these merely pretty words to soften her up? He did understand that this molly didn't have a vain bone in her body right? There's that word again, fair. If she gave him an answer that he disliked would he still refer to her as fair, level-headed, or considerate? Would he stand by her decision? Or convey she was wrong and turn on her? Crow, Crow, Crow, what had Bumblestar said about an exiled Crow?
She has gone through a lot over the past moons so she did have to think back some moons ago. Leopardfire seemed to mimic what Hawkblaze was saying about this sad broken bird and praising the leader. She would have appreciated it if she didn't think they were merely sweet-talking her.
"Crowpaw," She grumbled after a long thought. "You're the exile renamed Thrushkit who was going to lie to his leader about his oath and run off with a RiverClan cat right after his cereomony." Twilightstar hissed coldly and lashed her tail. The WindClan leader could tolerate a lot of things, but lying was not one of them. Clans were built on loyalty and trust, if a cat was willing to lie, all that trust was broken.
"You," She raised her tail a heartbeat for silence after she spoke to make sure Leopardfire and Hawkblaze wouldn't start singing this cat's praise. "Can speak your side and I'll listen." His story he could tell it. He was not some feeble kit or apprentice who needed his parents' holding his paw.
"You two," She meowed to Hawkblaze and Leopardfire in a stern tone. "Should be more worried about yourself than him. You decided to go on a senseless adventure to make amends to a cat who it sounds like wanted nothing to do with you. You both decided to up and leave the clan without even bothering to ask for leave or informing me."
"While the clan struggled to fight off deadly minks, raptors, RiverClan's constant threats, and recovering from multiple deaths and injuries, you two were away doing as you please and ignoring your oaths." Not to mention bringing back an exile. "No sorry for leaving or any care for those you left behind."
Maybe it was her but she had a habit of getting antsy when she left the clan to go out hunting or for a walk. The matriarch was overprotective, but how were warriors willing to walk away from the clan like this? She slept, ate, and fought beside these cats yet they could turn their back on their clan on a whim.
Twilightstar sat back on the grass and swerved her head as she listened to each cat speak. Her half-ear twitched erratically at the word fair. Fair, she's tried being fair her entire reign, and that fairness has gotten so many cats killed and WindClan trampled on. The life of a warrior was cruel and unforgiving it had no room for fairness. So whether she'd be fair or not, eh, hard to say. What's fair to her didn't need to be fair to anyone else. She'll listen and judge the cat as she deems fit that is all she was willing to do right now which was more than enough considering Hawkblaze's story.
Twilightstar was getting so very tired of hearing this excuse for cats who went missing. I needed to find my son, my daughter, my mom, my dad, my love. That's not how this worked!!! Her warriors should not be giving in to selfish impulses and running off at any chance they get. Does the Clan mean so little to them?! It would always offend her at how easily cats could toss aside the oath they swore to the clan to go on a wild rabbit chase.
Oh, Twilightstar hadn't realized that she had played such an esteemed role in Hawkblaze's growth or life. She'd feel a sense of pride and warm happiness if she knew he wasn't just saying that. Did he mean these words or were these merely pretty words to soften her up? He did understand that this molly didn't have a vain bone in her body right? There's that word again, fair. If she gave him an answer that he disliked would he still refer to her as fair, level-headed, or considerate? Would he stand by her decision? Or convey she was wrong and turn on her? Crow, Crow, Crow, what had Bumblestar said about an exiled Crow?
She has gone through a lot over the past moons so she did have to think back some moons ago. Leopardfire seemed to mimic what Hawkblaze was saying about this sad broken bird and praising the leader. She would have appreciated it if she didn't think they were merely sweet-talking her.
"Crowpaw," She grumbled after a long thought. "You're the exile renamed Thrushkit who was going to lie to his leader about his oath and run off with a RiverClan cat right after his cereomony." Twilightstar hissed coldly and lashed her tail. The WindClan leader could tolerate a lot of things, but lying was not one of them. Clans were built on loyalty and trust, if a cat was willing to lie, all that trust was broken.
"You," She raised her tail a heartbeat for silence after she spoke to make sure Leopardfire and Hawkblaze wouldn't start singing this cat's praise. "Can speak your side and I'll listen." His story he could tell it. He was not some feeble kit or apprentice who needed his parents' holding his paw.
"You two," She meowed to Hawkblaze and Leopardfire in a stern tone. "Should be more worried about yourself than him. You decided to go on a senseless adventure to make amends to a cat who it sounds like wanted nothing to do with you. You both decided to up and leave the clan without even bothering to ask for leave or informing me."
"While the clan struggled to fight off deadly minks, raptors, RiverClan's constant threats, and recovering from multiple deaths and injuries, you two were away doing as you please and ignoring your oaths." Not to mention bringing back an exile. "No sorry for leaving or any care for those you left behind."
Maybe it was her but she had a habit of getting antsy when she left the clan to go out hunting or for a walk. The matriarch was overprotective, but how were warriors willing to walk away from the clan like this? She slept, ate, and fought beside these cats yet they could turn their back on their clan on a whim.
Leopardfire looked down and sighed "I understand ma'am we ment no disrespect. I was gonna go on a hunting patrol as soon as I got back. I am sorry ma'am " she felt awful and looked at her paws
Name: Raven
Gender: Male, he/him
Age: 6 moons
Is your character a kit or an expecting queen?: No
Reason for Joining: He gets tired of being pushed around by the other loners so he wants to grow stronger, and he thought a clan might help with that. -cough- andhealsoheardofthembeforesonaturallyhewascurious -cough-
Rank Request: Apprentice
New Name Request (optional): any new name is fine
Mention: @Moonraven
Raven looked around the forest and bounced happily. He couldn't believe he was doing this! Should he do this? No. Perhaps not. Raven turned around but stopped. He should do this. It's the only way to get stronger. And to be able to boss loners around would be the dream. Raven jumped up into a tree and breathed in the air. I'm going to be a clan cat! He yowled happily. Raven looked down to see a group of cats staring up at him. He cringed and jumped down. Sorry. Was I too loud? I'll go. Raven meowed and turned. No. Stop it, Raven! You want to do this! Raven sighed and turned to face the cats. I want to join your clan. He stated and attempted to look fierce which was a bad attempt since he was so hyper. So... Can I? He asked and bounced up and down.
__________________
~ spirit ~
Please note that my character's actions do not describe how I feel!
The harsh tone Twilightstar adopted to address him was nothing short of painful to hear. He could understand her anger, but a small part of Crow hoped that his thoughts about the gray she-cat were true. How would he be able to explain his lie was an accident? Or that he didn't trust Bumblestar enough to not rip his throat out the moment he expressed his lack of loyalty toward his birth Clan?
What was to stop Twilightstar if she decided that Crow was not worth it? She was fair, yes, but the hostility did not escape his notice. Hawkblaze and Leopardfire both expressed their desire to be his-- what? He looked at the pair of warriors and stared at them for a moment that felt like it lasted eons of time. Tears wanted the freedom to run down his face, not out of sadness or pain, but out of a feeling he had thought was lost so long ago. A feeling he could not describe now. They... want me? To be a son?
Relief couldn't describe what he felt... but perhaps shock would. He never thought anyone would want him again, much less be a son again. Hawkblaze and Leopardfire were so quick to adopt him as their own, Crow couldn't help but wonder if they were doing that just to support him or some other means.
"I've... uh- I... I'll tell you the short version, but I hope it contains enough detail for you to make a decision you think is right. I know I lied... I screwed up and I am well aware of it. Exile, rename, demotion... that was nothing short of painful to go through and-- and I will never ever repeat the mis" He knew lying about his oath was wrong, though he didn't intend to lie at the time. He had spent so long away from ThunderClan, and returned, completely forgetting what an oath really meant. But he had also no trust in the Clan. Why he even returned, Crow didn't know. All he knew was the outskirts were no place for a Clanner. Being away from family was no place for him, being as family-focused as he was. Crow made a mistake, but he was willing to improve himself just so he could be a better tom, a better Clanmate, and overall just... someone everyone could rely on.
[B]"My parents-- my biological parents, Thrushstar and Quailfur... they hated me. Ever since I could speak, walk, whatever... they hated my guts. Never consoled me after I watched my littermates go missing one by one. I knew it was my fault because I showed them it was possible to get out of my mother's sight (I only went into the clearing, but my point still stands)," Crow's confidence grew, though his voice remained quiet and subtle. "It was never intentional, of course, but that guilt has eaten me alive for more than four seasons. Quailfur called me a 'scruff' and told my siblings to never turn out like me. And they didn't, though it came at a price I never wished on any of 'em. I watched my smallest, weakest sister get shredded by a fox even though I did my best to defend her not even two moons after she returned from being missing because her mentor didn't do his job as I had told him to do: give Quietpaw the best education he could. My mother and father didn't care about her before her death, and cared less about my other two sisters."
"They never once mentioned my other littermate: Fallowkit. They didn't mention my adopted sister: Lavenderpaw, after she went missing. They never cared to talk to me once I became an apprentice. And my mother voiced her wish for me, though didn't outright state it, I knew she wanted it-- my death, I mean." Crow took a minute to catch his breath. Though shaky, the young tom continued to tell the WindClan leader what he went through to even get to the point of no loyalty toward the one Clan he should have had loyalty to. "Then a moon after Quietpaw died, while I was mourning and struggling to cope with the loss of the one family member I was ever close to-- my mother got pregnant. Then after that, she died giving birth, leaving me with my abusive father. Leaving my only living sister with my father because my brothers were stillborn. And my father didn't even want her. Never referred to her by her name, only called her an 'it'. He left her and me for dead when ThunderClan's camp was being swallowed by the forest. No one else came to help me or her, I had to jump over a giant hole and sprain my ankle just to ensure we'd make it out alive."
Crow's green eyes flashed with the memory of the fear he felt during the sinkhole. Even though he was scared out of his mind, his first thought was to protect his sister. And to protect Quietpaw's memory. Nothing he's ever done had bad intentions behind it except when he was losing his mind around Thrushstar. One time, Crow had destroyed a part of the den just because he was angry with his father's inability to be a father. [B]"After my father abandoned the Clan, my sister later went missing. ThunderClan grew to hate my father, especially after he disowned my sister and me the day we lost our camp. All a moon after Quailfur died, too. I sought help from my Clanmates my entire life-- multiple times. None of them were even interested in helping me, not even any of my mentors.
"You know what I did? I sought help through my dreams-- unintentionally, yes. My nightmares were relentless, refusing to give up. But one cat, the RiverClanner, came and gave me a way out of that disastrous life. She and I became friends and she helped me realize that ThunderClan was not a place I needed to live in. I had no loyalty toward that Clan the moment they abandoned me. I wanted to live in RiverClan-- not just to be with that RiverClanner, but because I have RiverClan blood. My grandfather, Pondwhisker, was a RiverClanner. He was the one who taught me what love was... my parents didn't even bother to do that. They never showed it, never said it. My grandfather did. I didn't want to join RiverClan because of Sweetsong. I wanted to do it even long before I knew that cat existed, but I was convinced otherwise. And since then I obviously couldn't handle being ignored and-- and neglected by the Clan I was born in and grew up in."
"I wanted to go to RiverClan because Bumblestar would rip out my throat the minute she had an opportunity to. Sometimes I'm an idiot, as showcased when I unintentionally lied about my oath. That could have gotten me killed. Me being in contact with a RiverClanner could have gotten me killed. Me having no loyalty toward the Clan could have killed me, and I'm lucky it didn't. My life was in danger there, I-- no one-- can live where their life is in danger and everyone sensible knows that."
Crow was sure Twilightstar would agree with that. If she's as fair and whatever else Hawkblaze and Leopardfire say she is, then the young tabby would have some small amount of luck there. He had to keep telling his story though, otherwise, he may not have a decent chance at seeking solace in WindClan like he was hoping for.
"I was betrayed over and over and over there. I gave them more second chances than toes I have in hopes that they'd change. No one was able to convince me I could trust them. I want to be trusted and I realize that lying about keeping my oath was very wrong, but I had no other choice. I didn't trust Bumblestar, which is why I didn't express my desire to leave to her before my attempted ceremony." He was desperate, cocky, and trusted no one. That alone served as a recipe for disaster, which Crow was blind to at the time. "I've been an apprentice since I was six moons old because no damn mentor could do their job... and the time I finally get the chance to be a warrior, my trust was betrayed by my mentor and she betrayed me the day I found out Bluekit (my sister that my mother died to give life to) was alive and safe! The day she and I reunited! I was a better father figure to my own sibling than my own damn father, and I know that because before she yelled at me, she was happy to see me. She hugged me. And now--"
Crow sniffed back the tears that began to express their desire to stream down his face like a waterfall.. His eyes shined with broken hope and endless longing, but Crow refused to break down this time unlike so many other times. "My sister hates me because unlike you, Bumblestar didn't give me a chance to explain anything. My sister is the apprentice to the cat that renamed me after my starsforesaken damn father-- or lack thereof-- the one that demoted me. The one that exiled me! Tore me away from the only blood family I've got! And my sister yelled at me, not even letting me touch her again... because I wanted to go to the Clan that gave her numerous scars. I didn't know RiverClan did that to her-- and she yelled at me for it. She yelled at me for being like the father who abused, neglected, and abandoned us. If I had known they did that prior to my exile... I'd fight tooth and claw to make sure RiverClan would think twice about hurting my sister. Violent as it may seem, I'm deeply protective of my family."
"And StarClan took the lack of faith I have in them a step further to test me... see if I end up breaking. They went so far as to lead me into an outsider's territory that I didn't mean to trespass in about a moon or so after I was exiled. That outsider? He-- he tortured me. I don't remember how long I was there. But I've shed enough blood to know that I'm never going to be welcome in the outskirts... I'm never going to be welcome in ThunderClan," A truth that was far too hard for him to swallow at times. A truth that he'd feel heated and overwhelmingly angry. "And I'm never going to be welcome at RiverClan, nor do I want to go there now that I know what they did to my sister. ShadowClan I can just forget-- they're a whole different kind of Clan. WindClan is my only chance-- my only opportunity to be better than the fox-hearted ex-leader of ThunderClan. Be better than what ThunderClan sees in me. To be better than what I fought so hard against."
"I was forced to train in the Dark Forest for a short amount of time and got injured there... I've seen what the afterlife is like if I end up committing crimes. I don't want that-- I want to be someone who can prove change is possible. That no family tree is beholden to their past actions or past generations. I can't make that change alone... so please, Twilightstar... call me what you will, but I swear to you... I am not what Bumblestar claims I am. I'm just asking for a chance-- a good chance-- to prove to you and everyone else that I am worth having around."
He didn't care what Twilightstar called him, whether she continued to refer to him as Thrushkit now that she could recall what Bumblestar said about him or not. Crow was sick of getting his small hopes in life crushed for the benefit of selfish, nonchalant, bloodthirsty, Clanners. He could care less what ThunderClan thought of him, but he was not going to let another cat be influenced by the judgement of an enemy. Bumblestar did not deserve that satisfaction, nor did Spiderthroat or Redhawk.
"That outsider went by the same name I did. He proved to be the cat I could become if I didn't attempt to fix my past to have a better future. Please... help me become better than what I am, I believe you, WindClan, and these two warriors here can do that."
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Characters
Crow (Purrks: Heightened Perception, Agatha Kitty, Hulk SMASH, Dreamwalker)
Ravenhawk
Re: WindClan Outsider Joining
Cloverkit finder 