SkyClan Leader's Den

[The Cannibal]

@Sagittarius

The Skyclan leader was curled up in his nest, not sleeping, but staring at the wall with his back to the entrance of his den. His eyes still stung with grief, and it clung to his pelt, rooting him to his nest, rooting him in this position. He didn't wish to speak to anyone, to see anyone, to acknowledge anyone. His deputy was gone before he could even forgive her, she died knowing he still distrusted her. And even after that, he still couldn't bring himself to fully trust his own clan, or any of the other clans. It felt as if he were having all 8 of his remaining lives ripped from him, searing through all of his being and leaving him powerless to even so much as move. The Skyclan leader was in a pathetic state and it showed.

At first the words spoken from the entrance didn't register and Grousestar simply laid their, his ears swiveling back before he realized what had been said. Immediately he narrowed his eyes and lifted his head, a spark of anger pushing back against the tide of grief rippling inside of him. "I said I'm done with allegiances. You four clans have damaged Skyclan enough, I want to salvage what I have left of my clan." Shakily the leader, much skinnier than what he was at the gathering, stood, turning to face the Shadowclan leader with a face that was not at all friendly. Despite the anger though, sadness could be seen just under the surface, the fur around his eyes damp from countless tears that had been shed.

"You have no business sneaking into my clan to try and convince me to save you. I'm not saving anyone anymore. All I've gotten from saving cats is more Skyclan blood spilled and trust broken. I will have none of it." Despite Windystar never saying that he wanted to ally with Skyclan, Grousestar assumed it. That's all he saw the other clans as, cats that vied for favor so that they could use you. He was tired of it. Never would he had guessed that the new leader would want to simply... Talk.

[vellichor]

@The Cannibal

He waited awhile outside. Too long, if you ask him. Something had to be up, or maybe the SkyClan leader was simply... ignoring him. Windystar hoped that wasn't the case. He had seen the bad shape that Grousestar was in at the last Gathering. StarClan only knew what was going on, how the leader he had seen as unwavering and kind had broken. It was up to him to pick up the pieces and help this cat in need. It's what he did, no matter the outcome for him. Whether Grousestar would accept him or, more realistically, snap at him and tell him to leave, Windystar would stay until he thought he had made a difference.

The sandy feline's heart pounded in his chest as he heard shuffling. And then, he saw the SkyClan leader. His ears flattened against his skull as he looked the frail cat up and down. This was bad. And here he was, snapping at the ShadowClan leader but he could definitely see signs of underlying sadness. This hurt his heart. He listened to what the leader said without interruption; this needed to go well or else he could run the risk of endangering his own Clan. When he was finished, Windystar shook his head. "Grousestar, I'm not like Blazingstar or Fallenstar. I'm not going to come in here, use your Clan, and leave like nothing happened." Bold words? Maybe. But would they work? "I don't want an allegiance. I want to talk to you. Not as leaders, but as... cats." Hmm, kind of an awkward ending, yes. But he was okay with that.

He wouldn't move, enter, exit, without Grousestar's command. He didn't want to threaten the vulnerable tom. Instead, Windystar nonchalantly took a paw and drew it over his ears, trying to kill time while he figured out what to say next. "I just want to talk is all. Forget petty alliances." the large cat nearly snarled at the word "alliances". That stupid word had killed too many cats, broken too many hearts, and hurt too many leaders. In his eyes, war was stupid and a coward's way out of a situation. He was the kind of tom who would rather fight with words than claws.

[The Cannibal]

@Sagittarius

Grousestar didn't miss Windystar looking him up and down, taking in his appearance, and it sparked a dull fire of anger in his chest. The new leader had no business judging him and his appearance. He saved his clan, he saved all of the clans from the rule of the evil leaders. He deserved respect even in the state he was currently in. However he was slightly appeased when his speech was uninterrupted.

The tabby tom's pupils narrowed into near slits though as he saw the other leader shake his head and before he could question the motion, the Shadowclan leader continued. And what he heard was not.. What he expected. In fact, he had to blink, as if to make sure that he was awake, he was conscious and hearing things right. This tom.. This leader.. Would travel all the way from Shadowclan just to talk to him? Not even about alliances or treaties or politics.. Just to talk? For a moment all he could do was just stare at the other leader, the gears in his mind turning, trying to process and think of underlying meaning. What in Starclan's name would this cat want to talk about if it wasn't for the gain of his own clan? That's what all of the other leaders seemed so heavily focused on, even if it was only using him for their benefit.

Grousestar flinched slightly as he saw Windystar take a paw and draw it over his ears. Slowly flicking an ear, the older tom would eye him one more time before subtly nodding and turning, gesturing with his tail for the other leader to follow him into his den. "Should any mention of an alliance come up, I will personally take one of your lives as punishment for your blatant disrespect." The words were empty threats. Grousestar would never bring himself to break the warrior code, no matter how hurt, no matter how battered, no matter how upset he got. Sometimes he thought that was the only thing keeping him going. Sighing quietly, he settled into his nest and fixated his attention on Windystar. "You have my attention."

[The Cannibal]

@Charmer

The tom laid in his den quietly, curled up in his nest with his back to the entrance. He hadn't been seen much around camp since Auroraflame's death, aside from haphazardly assigning cats to various patrols. He didn't go around camp, asking cats how they are and having conversation with them anymore, in fact, he didn't actively speak to anyone unless they spoke to him. He didn't go out on his walks in the territory anymore, he hardly came outside of his den aside from necessity to eat and make dirt. It wasn't healthy. But at this time.. Grousestar didn't care.
There were so many things weighing him down and so few cats that he could actually talk to about it that it was physically dragging him to the ground, practically gluing him to the nest he lied in now. There were so few cats he trusted now, it felt like at any moment his clan could turn against him because a few cats decided they didn't like his decisions, throwing the entire warrior code away. What was the point in being leader if your clan decided when you had the power to decide for them and when not? What was he anymore? Did his clan not trust him? Because surely, he was feeling that about them. Regardless.. He would lead. But for right now, he distrusted others. Including those of his own clan.

[Charmer]

Shinefang shuffled into Grousestar's den and found the leader curled in his nest. He'd been this way since Auroraflame's death, secluded, barely functional as a leader. He wasn't acting like the calm and collected leader he had always been. Here the tom sat throwing a tantrum like an apprentice assign the change the elder's bedding. Of course Groustar had every right to be angry, but that didn't change the fact that Skyclan still needed him. The old tom let out a low growl, muffled by the sprigs of chamomile he lodged between his teeth. Making no effort to quite his foot steps, Shinefang wove around to stand in front of his leader's face, his back to the den wall. When he thought the leader was looking at him, Shinefang let the herbs drop unceremoniously from his jaws. "Still moping, I see," the medicine cat remarked gruffly. "Any idea how long you plan to keep that up? Last time I checked, leaders of clan generally try to go among their clanmates for more than ceremonies and other bare necessities to keep clan life going. Of course, I'm only your medicine cat. What do I know?" He added, shrugging his bony shoulders.

[The Cannibal]

@Charmer

Despite his current condition, Grousestar was fully aware of the pawsteps that shuffled into his den, his right ear just barely swiveling towards the location of the noise. A very mild twinge of curiosity poked at him, but not enough for him to lift his head and fully look at whoever it was that bothered to come to him. It was the growl that came from the cat as they padded in front of him that caused him to lift his head and fully stare at the cat that bothered to walk around and face him directly instead of talking to his back. It was the medicine cat, his medicine cat, Shinefang. A small flicker of anger ignited in him. This was a cat that had decided it was right to break the warrior code and rebel against him and their clan in the middle of battle just because they thought what he was doing was wrong. This was a cat that would likely do it again on any given whim.
The herbs dropped from the older toms jaws, but Grousestar stared solely at Shinefang. He had half the intention of sending this tom out of his den as unceremoniously as the tom had dropped the herbs. But he held his tongue. "You're right. What do you know Shinefang? Clearly not the warrior code. That part where the clan leaders word is the code? Or have you forgotten that? The choices I make are always with good intention for Skyclan, there has never been a time where I put myself before any member of this clan. There was no reason for you or others to suddenly distrust me, unless its been something you've been holding for a while. So is that in Shinefang? Have you always lacked trust in me, in my decision making for the clan?" Slowly the tom would stand up and despite there being anger and sharpness in his voice, there was pain in his eyes. He, at one point, wanted to consider Shinefang a friend. Wanted to consider him a cat he could trust, just as he did with Auroraflame. But now he was speaking his mind, speaking his fears. And it hurt him that he couldn't just forgive and forget what Shinefang did, just as with his former deputy. It could never be that simple, because there was always that thought. What if he did it again? What if Shinefang was still holding secret meetings, speaking with other clans? Plotting against him? How could you bring yourself to trust them again knowing he's already done it once?

[Charmer]

Originally Posted by The Cannibal

@Charmer

Despite his current condition, Grousestar was fully aware of the pawsteps that shuffled into his den, his right ear just barely swiveling towards the location of the noise. A very mild twinge of curiosity poked at him, but not enough for him to lift his head and fully look at whoever it was that bothered to come to him. It was the growl that came from the cat as they padded in front of him that caused him to lift his head and fully stare at the cat that bothered to walk around and face him directly instead of talking to his back. It was the medicine cat, his medicine cat, Shinefang. A small flicker of anger ignited in him. This was a cat that had decided it was right to break the warrior code and rebel against him and their clan in the middle of battle just because they thought what he was doing was wrong. This was a cat that would likely do it again on any given whim.
The herbs dropped from the older toms jaws, but Grousestar stared solely at Shinefang. He had half the intention of sending this tom out of his den as unceremoniously as the tom had dropped the herbs. But he held his tongue. "You're right. What do you know Shinefang? Clearly not the warrior code. That part where the clan leaders word is the code? Or have you forgotten that? The choices I make are always with good intention for Skyclan, there has never been a time where I put myself before any member of this clan. There was no reason for you or others to suddenly distrust me, unless its been something you've been holding for a while. So is that in Shinefang? Have you always lacked trust in me, in my decision making for the clan?" Slowly the tom would stand up and despite there being anger and sharpness in his voice, there was pain in his eyes. He, at one point, wanted to consider Shinefang a friend. Wanted to consider him a cat he could trust, just as he did with Auroraflame. But now he was speaking his mind, speaking his fears. And it hurt him that he couldn't just forgive and forget what Shinefang did, just as with his former deputy. It could never be that simple, because there was always that thought. What if he did it again? What if Shinefang was still holding secret meetings, speaking with other clans? Plotting against him? How could you bring yourself to trust them again knowing he's already done it once?

The old medicine cat narrowed his eye at his leader's remarks about his knowledge of the warrior code. Still, in spit of the grizzly tom's hot temper, he managed to keep his mouth shut and wait for his leader to finish speaking, honestly relieved he evidently still had the strength of spirit to do so. He wanted to let his tail bush and have his hair stand on end, but the pain in his leader's eyes as Grousestar spoke took the gnarled edge off his anger. When the brown tabby was finished, Shinefang waited for a long moment, then replied. "First of all, if you think I'm too old cuff the ear of a younger cat claiming that I don't know the warrior code, you might want to think again. I've been serving Skyclan since before your parents were apprenticed. Second..." he paused, weighing his words carefully. "Second, I'm sorry for breaking your trust like that. I did it for the same reasons you did. For Skyclan. I tried to tell you about my concerns, but I should have tried harder to make you listen. Not because I don't trust you. To answer your question, that has never been the case. I think you're a great leader to Skyclan. What I don't trust are some of these hot-headed clan leaders like Blazingstar and Fallenstar who would sooner battle than talk out their problems for a moment. You can trust someone immensely and they can still be wrong. I think you were wrong about Blazingstar. I still do. You're going to be wrong sometimes as a warriors, apprentice, or leader. You may not be a medicine cat, but you probably at least know what a death berry looks like and if I were to hand a cat one thinking it was a juniper berry, I'd want you to do everything in your power to keep that cat from eating that berry." The old tom paused. "I don't expect you to trust me again like you did. In some ways, that's good judgement on your part. Not because I'm plotting and scheming, mind you, but because I went behind your back once and you have the good sense to be suspicious of a cat who does that... but for what little it's worth, I am sorry."

[The Cannibal]

Originally Posted by Charmer

The old medicine cat narrowed his eye at his leader's remarks about his knowledge of the warrior code. Still, in spit of the grizzly tom's hot temper, he managed to keep his mouth shut and wait for his leader to finish speaking, honestly relieved he evidently still had the strength of spirit to do so. He wanted to let his tail bush and have his hair stand on end, but the pain in his leader's eyes as Grousestar spoke took the gnarled edge off his anger. When the brown tabby was finished, Shinefang waited for a long moment, then replied. "First of all, if you think I'm too old cuff the ear of a younger cat claiming that I don't know the warrior code, you might want to think again. I've been serving Skyclan since before your parents were apprenticed. Second..." he paused, weighing his words carefully. "Second, I'm sorry for breaking your trust like that. I did it for the same reasons you did. For Skyclan. I tried to tell you about my concerns, but I should have tried harder to make you listen. Not because I don't trust you. To answer your question, that has never been the case. I think you're a great leader to Skyclan. What I don't trust are some of these hot-headed clan leaders like Blazingstar and Fallenstar who would sooner battle than talk out their problems for a moment. You can trust someone immensely and they can still be wrong. I think you were wrong about Blazingstar. I still do. You're going to be wrong sometimes as a warriors, apprentice, or leader. You may not be a medicine cat, but you probably at least know what a death berry looks like and if I were to hand a cat one thinking it was a juniper berry, I'd want you to do everything in your power to keep that cat from eating that berry." The old tom paused. "I don't expect you to trust me again like you did. In some ways, that's good judgement on your part. Not because I'm plotting and scheming, mind you, but because I went behind your back once and you have the good sense to be suspicious of a cat who does that... but for what little it's worth, I am sorry."

Grousestar knew well of the older toms temper, but in the moment, he didn't care. If Shinefang had lashed out, had he even made a move to, it would have only further degraded their relationship and further pushed his distrust. In this time, it was good for the medicine cat to hold enough strength to not outright cuff the leader, even if he was wrong.
The words that were first spoken made the leaders fur bristle along his spine, ready to further iterate the point where the medicine cat had betrayed him, which was a deliberate breaking of the code. But he paused before he could get the words out, not quite expecting what next came out of the other tom's mouth. His fur laid smooth for the most part and his aggression melded away. It was an apology... Not a half-hearted quick one, but one that actually.. It somehow reached him, even in this state.
It wasn't enough to mend the gap between them, but something to help the wound heal so that possibly... Possibly they could reform that trust. Glancing to the ground, the leader sat back down, shoulders sagging again. It was confusing and frustrating to go through so many emotions and still not be clear on where you stand. He wished for clarity and peace of mind.. But this was better than his blind anger and mistrust.
"I... I don't think I can forgive you yet.. No, not yet Shinefang." There was a slight pause as the leader searched for the words. "Even in Auroraflame's passing I haven't found myself able to fully forgive her.. But.. I'm glad that you understand that.. That things might not be the same. Some cats blow this off as.. As nothing. Perhaps even as a good thing.. It's nice to know that someone understands what.. What it's done to me. Or at least taken a moment to.. Explain. At least I know, for you, it wasn't about trust on my part, but the other leaders. And I see that now, well, with Blazingstar anyways. It was a mistake. I accept that. I was.. I was too desperate to pick an ally, planning for the future, to fully weigh the consequences." Grousestar stopped himself, shaking his head. "I'm rambling. What was it that.. You came in here for?" His gaze finally lifted back to the face of Shinefang, anger gone, but a whirlwind of other emotions clear as day.

[vellichor]

@The Cannibal

It seemed that the fluffy tom made the right decision to let Grousestar remain uninterrupted. He recieved no growls, no snarls or harsh words aside from when Grousestar misinterpreted his intentions. Which, in the leader’s current state, could Windystar blame him? He had assumed that the leader was upset still because of the wars and unnecessary violence. Where was Auroraflame? Could she help him reason with Grousestar?

Hopefully this meeting - no, that sounded too formal. This conversation would go well. The ShadowClan cat would probably be poking at a few sore subjects. He would have to use a gentle tone, know when to quit, and treat the cat before him with respect. A gentle tail flick would pull him forward, sitting down on the ground while the other settled in his nest. He didn’t mind; in fact, it was probably better that he didn’t. The kind feline listened to Grousestar’s last warning, nodding along. Even though he knew it was most likely an empty threat, Windystar responded, "Thank you."

Though he tingled with nervous energy (he didn’t think he’d really get this far!), Windystar forced himself to keep still, save for a few small twitches in his fluffy tail. "I -" he cut himself off; his voice was about 3 octaves too high and full of nerves. Calm. "I wanted to talk to you because I noticed how you were acting last Gathering." This might be a sore subject, so he quickly went on. "I’ve always looked up to you, Grousestar - even as a young warrior, you seemed like the brains, the level-headed leader. You seemed a lot like I was. What I wanted to be if I was ever chosen as a deputy. Kind and peaceful, reasonable and fair. These are all things I’ve strived to be." The emotional cat forced himself to take a few deep breaths before continuing. "Times have been rough. I hate to see a wonderful cat like you in this kind of state. What you need is not an alliance, not a treaty, but someone you can turn to in times of need. Someone who doesn’t demand anything back. A shoulder to lean on, per se." He would stop there, in order to gauge the tom’s reaction to figure out what to say next. He kept his bright amber hues moving, flickering between his paws and Grousestar, hoping to find something there.

[Charmer]

Originally Posted by The Cannibal

Grousestar knew well of the older toms temper, but in the moment, he didn't care. If Shinefang had lashed out, had he even made a move to, it would have only further degraded their relationship and further pushed his distrust. In this time, it was good for the medicine cat to hold enough strength to not outright cuff the leader, even if he was wrong.
The words that were first spoken made the leaders fur bristle along his spine, ready to further iterate the point where the medicine cat had betrayed him, which was a deliberate breaking of the code. But he paused before he could get the words out, not quite expecting what next came out of the other tom's mouth. His fur laid smooth for the most part and his aggression melded away. It was an apology... Not a half-hearted quick one, but one that actually.. It somehow reached him, even in this state.
It wasn't enough to mend the gap between them, but something to help the wound heal so that possibly... Possibly they could reform that trust. Glancing to the ground, the leader sat back down, shoulders sagging again. It was confusing and frustrating to go through so many emotions and still not be clear on where you stand. He wished for clarity and peace of mind.. But this was better than his blind anger and mistrust.
"I... I don't think I can forgive you yet.. No, not yet Shinefang." There was a slight pause as the leader searched for the words. "Even in Auroraflame's passing I haven't found myself able to fully forgive her.. But.. I'm glad that you understand that.. That things might not be the same. Some cats blow this off as.. As nothing. Perhaps even as a good thing.. It's nice to know that someone understands what.. What it's done to me. Or at least taken a moment to.. Explain. At least I know, for you, it wasn't about trust on my part, but the other leaders. And I see that now, well, with Blazingstar anyways. It was a mistake. I accept that. I was.. I was too desperate to pick an ally, planning for the future, to fully weigh the consequences." Grousestar stopped himself, shaking his head. "I'm rambling. What was it that.. You came in here for?" His gaze finally lifted back to the face of Shinefang, anger gone, but a whirlwind of other emotions clear as day.

Like frost on a newleaf morning, Shinefang watched as the Grousestar's cold rage began to thaw before his eye. At the leader's admission that he could not forgive the betrayal yet, Shinefang only gave a deep nod. "Trust is earned, not given. You want more time and that's only fair. Each of us did what we felt we had to do for our clan. Nothing more. Nothing less." Then Grousestar looked Shinefang in the eye, and the younger cat looked more clear-headed than he had in half a moon. It warmed the old tom's heart to see life back in the leader again, that ease of mind that was what told the old tom his clan was in capable paws. Shinefang nudged the chamomile he'd brought a little closer. "Thought you could use something to ease your worry a little. No one saw me bring it in. That's it." With that as his only explanation, Shinefang stood and began to walk back toward the den's exit.