☆*: .｡. o The Blind, The Broken, The Forgiving o .｡.:*☆
❧ Shadowclan Apprentice
❧ Purrks - Shadow Fiend, Mind Reader Snakes and sinners, smoke and mirrors
But why am I the one that has to pay?
No. No. No.
Just. No.
"You think an apology cuts it?" She huffed.
"Where were you when I needed you? Where the hell were you when Cougarbite went missing? When Aunt Lostspark- Larkfire died?" She paused between her aunt's two names, realizing that Hawkpaw probably wouldn't know Lostspark's new name.
"You left me alone. Broken and alone. You left me to heal my broken pieces by myself" She was half debating just stalking back to the apprentice's den, or bugging a warrior to get her out of camp. Anything to get away from her disgrace of a sister.
╔══ ≪ °❈° ≫ ══╗ Hawkpaw
Dilute tortoiseshell she-cat with forest green eyes
She/Her | 13 Moons| + every 15th | ShadowClan Apprentice | Has a huge personality; Ambitious and slightly narcissistic
[9/100]
. 。・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.
. 。・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.
There she went again, throwing herself in stuations she couldn't quite escape from. This was just how she was, wasn't it? Duskpaw had a good reason to be mad at her. A very good reason. And Hawkpaw--the name left a strange, hollow space in her mind--did not deserve forgiveness. And for the first time in forever, she admitted to everything. Her flaws. Flaws that she would brush over, because she was "simply the best".
"I don't deserve your forgiveness, Duskpaw. And I'm not saying this to earn it, either," she paused. There were so many things she wanted to say. But she just couldn't. How could she? Ignoring completely about the rather shocking and sudden news about Cougarbite's disappearance and Larkfire's death, she continued. She couldn't worry about that now. Duskpaw was the only one important... As of now. "I was young and foolish when I left, you know that. I was just... A stupid kit in an apprentice's body. I'm so sorry for... Leaving you alone in the dark to fight the world by yourself."--Was this the right choice of words?--"I'll never leave you. Ever. You're my sister. And I've always loved you. And I will continue to love you for as long as we're both alive. It was my fault for not being able to be there for you. It had been one of my life goals. To protect you. But... You have every right to be mad at me. You have every right to hate me, if I'm being honest. It's all on me. I'm sorry. I never should've left."
But you did.
Shut up.
"I'm sorry for being the arrogant and inconsiderate kit I've been my whole life. I'm sorry for not being able to protect you. I'm sorry for... For not being there for you when you needed me. I'm sorry. I really am. I-I'm... Not sure if I can explain how... Sorry I am in words," she refused to let the tears spill. Not right now. Not when she was supposed to be the strong one. She stepped back. "I don't deserve you, Duskpaw. You deserve so much better."
Please feel free to bump me on any ongoing RPs. I have ADHD and it gets really hard for me to keep track of all my RPs ^^
• • • Icekit • Silentpaw • Mothflame • Firepaw • Daykit • Windkit • Spiritkit • Eveningpaw • Mimickit • Starlingkit • Hiddenpaw • Milkbee • Flickerflame Character Site Do you dare approach?
Fishkit swayed her tail behind her slightly the tip of her tail twitching slightly as she looked at rookfire, fish shrugged as the medic asked her a question she wanted to be an apprentice already, she could have been one but wasn't cause she snuck out of camp a punishment well earned. Maybe now that she was free form the med cat den she could be apprenticed begging she won't be 8 moons by then, fishkit sighed “ Yeah, i guess so She meowed looking at rookfire she wondered who her mentor would be she couldn't guess, but hoped they were an good warrior or anyone would be nice if she was being honest with herself, but she would have to wait and see. Fishkit flicked her dark colored ear before sitting down wrapping her warm colored tail over her cream paws.
okay this wasnt as entertaining as he first hoped it would be and the medic had a whole lot of mud to clean from his pelt so he wasnt super keen on keeping this going for a lot longer than necesarry. the kit wasnt chatty in any capacity which was a pity given he wouldve potentially changed his mind about his opinion on her if she showed some sort of personality but if she wouldnt so shall be it. considering age and heritage though, rookfire couldnt say she was in his top 3 least liked apprentices or kits right now but also far from the top 3 most liked. those spots went to palepaw, cinderpaw, birdpaw, gutspaw and the dawnspawn as one because he was really bad at picking favourites. "aye, good lass" he confirmed with a nod, ear twitching towards the medicine den in case mossfreckles soft paw steps could be heard from outside while he remained with his head tilted downwards, eyes on the multi shade brown kit. finally, he averted his gaze, stepping around the kit to make his way inside, only now realising he shouldve probably found a body of water to clean off some of the mud before returning...left to pick dried mud out of his fur at a painstaking pace he settled in front of the medicine den to dry off first.
[ super short but we r done w this interaction i guess! ]
Sleepysunrise
[ 13 moons | She / Her | Shc Enforcer ]
The peaceful camp and Sleepysunrise's sleepless night was disrupted, arguing echoing around camp like an echo of her past. Vibrant eyes slowly opened to look out from her guarding position, the source of the disruption clear; Duskpaw. And the other must be her sister; Sleepysunrise struggled to recall her name, she hadn't seen many of Cougarbite's kits since they were... Well, since all of them were but a moon or less old. Duskpaw was an exception.
For a few moments Sleepysunrise watched from the shadows of camp, taking in the accusations thrown the other's way with disinterest until the accusing dared utter her mothers name. The enforcer would have stepped away, ignored their kitten spat and keep on guarding camp, had Duskpaw not dared use her mama's name. She blinked once, twice, that tingling sensation in her paws; and once, the white-tufted feline stood and approached the disruptive pair.
Dull gaze was replaced with freezing cold as unforgiving eyes settled on Duskpaw firstly, ignoring her companion. Unblinking, Sleepysunrise tilted her head, speaking in an eerie calm. "You are no better. You speak as if you knew mama... But mama has not once mentioned you. You were not close. Were you?
Keep mama's name out of our maw. You sully her good standing."
She was speaking of Lostspark, naturally.
Turning Hawkpaw's way, Sleepysunrise trained her cold stare on the weakling apprentice. "You. You act a fool. Ask her-" Duskpaw, "-where she has been. What she has done. You were gone. But so was she. Cougarbite has been gone for moons. Duskpaw reappeared last moon. She was not here when Cougarbite left. If she was..."
She turned her unblinking gaze back on Duskpaw. "You scream grief now. You did not before. If you were here. Why?"
Her head tilted as the genuine question left her maw, before she moved on, drawing her own conclusion. "You were gone... Or are slow. Untrained at twelve moons."
It was a rough estimate, she and Duskpaw were around the same age. "Stop your act. Start training."
She stepped aside, looking between the two siblings, considering them for several long moments. She had learned from Nightshiver that young kits cry to express their emotions and need for care when they can't quite talk yet; Sleepysunrise found it an odd concept. But as her level gaze settled on the accusing cousin, she couldn't help but wonder if that applied to all cats. That Duskpaw was just in dire need of attention, but for some reason could not form coherent words to express as such. Maybe it would help if they returned to the nursery, she wondered.
white tipped paws carefully tucked beneath his body and striped tail wrapped around, rookfire fully opened his eyes at the commotion, while he had never really picked up on guarding camp like he knew sleepysunrise tended to do, it was still not a rarity to see the former enforcer at varying states of half dozing to fully awake and watching in a corner of camp. on this particular evening, he had chosen to spend some quiet time with the youngest enforcer, resting relatively close to lostsparks dark and white tufted child.
rookfire wasnt sure what was more ridiculous, the fact that two warrior aged apprentices were seemingly having a fight the whole clearing had to hear, one of them being duskpaw (again) or the fact that he stumbled slightly getting up, long limbs stiff yet warmer than the rest of his body from prolonged loafing. where he would have given them a bit longer to get the anger or whatever out before stepping in, sleepysunrise had made a move prompting him to follow with well guarded curiosity.
"how come every time i see yer its screamin' n cryin' n never doin' yer duties" the former enforcer addressed duskpaw without a single other word spoken in greeting, voice briefly overlapping with sleepys. with that, he was pretty much done talking for now, serving as some sort of guard to the younger molly who appeared to know far more about the situation than he did.
unmoving apart from one or the other twitch of his tail or ear, what he had gathered was that sleepy was upset about duskpaws relation to lostspark? or the apperant lack of one, listing off a lot of things he quite honestly had no idea about due to having come to shadowclan barely 6 moons ago. cougarbite was...who?? they seemed important yet the tom struggled to see through the whole thing, lacking a connection between dawnstar that cougarbite guy, duskpaw, hawkpaw and lostspark that wasnt lostspark being dawnstars daughter. it hadnt make sense last time and it didnt make sense now, even if sleepysunrise did a far better job at explaining than the screaming child had done last time. confused but in agreement with sleepy about the training bit, if he could train to be a medicine cat and train warrior apprentices and kits at the same time, some twelve moon old apprentice could get their things together finally.
Redleaf yawned as she walked out of the warriors den
Runningstorm looked for his mate, Pineberry
Tigerleaf headed to the nursery, her belly soon to burst with kids
Smoketail looked around the clearing
Spiderweb looked for something to do
Re: ShadowClan Clearing
