Just I lil smth I wrote! (TW!)

[ollie]

 

Oh no. Oh no. No no no no no no no. This..this couldn't be happening. No. Orchiddawn stared in horror at the bloodied she-cat at his paws, a horrible guilty feeling in chest. Oh no. How could he do this? The toms fur stood on end as he watched the blood flow from the cat that used to be his mate. This..this wasn't his fault..right?? She- she had attacked him. His chest tightened. Why did she attack him? Orchiddawn tried to take a deep breath, but he couldn't. They had just killed his mate. The cat he thought loved him. No. Cats who love you don't attack you for no apparent reason. The tom's ears flattened as the thought came to his head. No. No. No. No. No. No. He took a step back as the blood seeped through her soft, elegant pelt. Scarlet dripped from his maw onto his chest. A sob wracked his body as he truly realized what had just happened. [NAME] had invited him on a walk through the Windclan territory, and he happily agreed. Orchiddawn loved spending time with his mate. The two left camp, and then it quickly went downhill from there. The two had happily been together for almost 13 moons now. Well. Mostly happily. [NAME] had often gotten quite mad at him for little things often, such as bringing her a piece of prey that was too small, saying something too loud, getting over excited over little things, etcetera. Orchiddawn took it though. Because he loved her. That wasn't a good thing. She apparently didn't love him. Or maybe she did, and just had a funny way of showing it. He thought she loved him. When they first became mates, she was kind, gentle, soft. And, looks didn’t matter to Orchiddawn at all. But Starclan, was she beautiful. She had silky, feathery soft elegant fur, and beautiful eyes. And he loved her with all his heart. But she slowly found more and more traits she hated about him. And she figured she would do everyone a favor, and get rid of him. Fast forward to their walk around the territory, and Orchiddawn is happily talking to his mate—, who had apparently fallen behind, —about a plant he had saw. When he noticed she hadn't been responding and slowed down, he turned to face her, just in time to see [NAME] snarl and leap for him. He yelped as he was shoved to the ground, momentarily knocking the breath out of the tom. She pinned him to the ground, slashing her claws over his ear and raking his side. She placed her paw on his throat, and pressed down, preventing him from making any sounds. His back legs were still free. That was his chance. He kicked his legs into her stomach, flinging her off of him. Orchiddawn, foolishly, in his opinion, snarled and lept on top of her, pinning her shoulders down. That didn't stop her though. She got her paw up enough to try and slash his throat. He was panicking now, because blood from his ear was dripping into his eye, and those claws were dangerously close to his throat. In his fit of panic, he snapped down onto her neck, biting hard and digging her claws into her shoulders and ripping her paws away from him. They didn't mean to kill her. He still would've loved her. But he couldn't love her if he was dead. He stepped off of her, eyes filling with horror as realized who attacked him. Now we're back to this very moment, where the warrior was standing in front of his mates body with a deep, horrible, guilty feeling settling deeper into his chest. Along with that, he felt he couldn't breathe. Their shoulders were shaking, well no, their whole body was shaking. He had just killed his mate. The tom's chest and throat felt tight as he watched blood coat a usually, soft, elegant pelt. Yet he did nothing. He didn't try and help her, or anything. He just stood, rooted to spot. Oh no. No. No, this wasn't happening. She wasn't dead. He didn't kill her. This was all just some long, bad, dream. And he just needed to wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. WAKE UP, STUPID MOUSEBRAIN Orchiddawn felt dizzy, and he backed away more. He swallowed around the lump in his throat. One thought that he had not considered jumped to the front on his mind, and the panic set in more. How was he going to tell his clanmates? Just walk up to them, covered in blood of his own and the she-cats, and say that she had attacked him and he killed her out of defense. Starclan no. He could tell Leopardsong. Yeah..she would believe him, right? Orchiddawn, too blindly in love with his now deceased mate to realize that her behaviors towards him were in fact abusive. They wouldn't have a hard time believing him. They had seen the looks she gave him. They didn't want to say anything to the horribly in love tom.  He had been looking at with literal stars in his eyes, and followed her around and obeyed her every command like a lost, lovesick puppy. Orchiddawn pulled himself out his panicky thoughts, still having difficulty breathing. Twilightstar would need to know too. So his mothers are the first cats he would about this absolute nightmare. They were still slightly convinced this was all some sick, horrible, vivid nightmare. He still hadn't fully processed how this awful situation had started out with a walk. The whole situation had not yet been processed by his mind, and it was surely going to hit him like a train. The tom hadn't been standing there for long apparently,  even though it felt like moons, because when he bent down to rest his nose ontop of her head, it was still warm slightly, the warmth slowly seeping away from her. The warmth was no longer comforting, but an awful reminder of what he had just done. He stared for a moment,  his mind quickly catching up to everything that had happened. Orchiddawn's body shook with broken sobs. Why. Why Why Why Why Why WHY. WHY would she do this. He loved her, and he would give his life in order to protect her. And she tried to kill him. The thought brought a moment of anger, overriding the whirlwind of emotions he was feeling at the moment. The anger quickly vanished, quickly replaced with the overwhelming feeling of guilt and grief. The tom attempted to take a deep breath, but it ended up coming out as a shaky gasping sound. The tom was shaking again, and he felt dizzy. The amount of panic and everything else along with the slow loss of blood from his wounds probably didn't help with the dizziness. The toms thoughts began racing again. He hated this feeling. Feeling like he was in danger. His fight or flight kicked in, and his mind was screaming flight. He wasn't going to flee. He might be a coward, but he was still a damn warrior. He had to wait for the uncontrollable shaking which prevented him from standing to subside before he could continue his being horrified and inevitably taking his love— no. She didn't truly love him. And she hadn't for a while. —Before taking his dead mate back to camp and explaining this whole emotional mess he had just experienced.

I uhmm...idk what happened yall I got a lil bit too silly