it don't matter if they hate you if they all say your name [ p ]

[finley !!]

cobwebpaw

purrks ; the collector , herbal knowledge t2
she/they . rc . 15 moons . one lame leg
tags ; @starry
trigger warnings for this post: none

cobwebpaw took a breath, collecting herself, and then walked out of the apprentice's den and into the medicine den. averting her eyes from the inevitable presence of mistyshard, she mumbled, ' i thought i would.. move my stuff out of here. ' she grabbed the rock minkpaw had given to her, then pointed to the bed she had been sleeping in since the beginning of her brief stint as stand-in medicine cat.

' i'm.. sorry for being immature about all of this. that's.. uh- that's.. your bed now. you're gonna do.. well. ' she swallowed back the lump in her throat, barely holding back tears now, and went to exit the den. the hurt and ache that she felt was now mingled with anger. she had done so much for the clan in the way of healing. mistyshard had barely done anything, instead living the life of a warrior! it didn't feel deserved!!

[ cob's thoughts don't reflect mine ]

[starry]

MISTYSHARD
she/her | riverclan medicine cat | 37 moons

The scarred tabby sat in her new den, one amber eye looking at the wall. She felt kind of lost in here. No idea what to do and how to feel about all of this... Regardless, she was honored to take on the position and swore to herself she would not disappoint her clan. The strong scent of herbs was still a bit unusual. She felt like it already clung to her pelt, even though she had only been in here for less than a week. At least Marigoldleap was here to help her settle in. Everyone else was probably mad at her for "stealing their dream rank" or something... She didn't know on who's help and faith she could count on just yet. There were lots of thoughts swirling in her head when suddenly, Cobwebpaw popped into the den.

Misty looked up with a somewhat distressed look in her eye. Cobwebpaw... the determined apprentice who had been wanting the medicine cat rank as well. While Mistyshard could not change anything and she did want to stick with her new title, maybe there was some way Cob wouldn't hate her for the rest of her life? Jealousy and anger, those were emotions that had a big impact and could lead a cat to make irrational decisions. She didn't want anything like that to happen. In fact, she had enjoyed Cobwebpaw's company. She'd hoped they could become friends or at least acquaintances, and she did not want that to be ruined by her being the medicine cat. Oh no, she was leaving the den... Misty quickly got to her paws and tried to prevent Cob. Not in a physical way of course.

"Please Cobwebpaw, don't leave. We should talk about this. You're not being immature, let's just..." It felt like the words were stuck in her throat and she was unsure on what more to say.

[ @sillycreatur ]

[finley !!]

cobwebpaw

purrks ; the collector , herbal knowledge t2
she/they . rc . 15 moons . one lame leg
tags ; @starry :]
trigger warnings for this post: none

cobwebpaw shrugged, putting on a shaky smile. ' uh- yeah. we should. prob-probably. ' the stupid stutter, back again. she flicked her ear and placed down the rock minkpaw had given her. it was hard to talk. the words that she had attempted to formulate died in her throat. okay. first things first, she turned back from the den door and sat in front of mistyshard.

' um- after we talk.. do you want me to teach you some herbs? i don't know how much you know- ' she didn't want to sound like an awful cat, or be rude to her elder. cobwebpaw swallowed. confronting others and like. actually.. talking. scared her. in her brain this was way easier.

[starry]

MISTYSHARD
she/her | riverclan medicine cat | 38 moons
dreamwalker ⦁ beefed up t2

The healer attempted to softly rest her tail on Cobwebpaw's back. Learning some new herbs... sure, they could do that at the end of this talk. "That would be great. Yeah.. I don't know too much right now," she mewed, keeping her tone low and friendly. But herbs weren't what was important to her right now; more so the wellbeing of Cobwebpaw and how she was coping with this recent announcement. She took a few deep breaths before starting into the therapy-like, or rather clearing up problems and blockades, part of this conversation.

"I need you to tell me what's on your mind and what's frustrating you. If you're direct and harsh, I don't mind too much. I just want to clear this before any more problems arise and I don't want you to feel bad, okay? I might not be your favourite cat right now but... I do need honesty. I'll listen and give you advice without judging, I promise. Is... it just about me? Or also Minkpaw? If something about how you're feeling revolves around losing Minkpaw and not knowing where she is, I have lost lots of cats too... maybe I can help with that." She couldn't really do much more than promising Cobby she would listen and help. Hopefully this would work out.

[ @sillycreatur - Cobwebpaw ]

[finley !!]

purrks ; the collector , herbal knowledge t2
15 moons . one lame leg
tags ; @starry
trigger warnings for this post: none

cobwebpaw paused, fur prickling sadly. she appreciated the gesture of placing misty's tail on top of the apprentice's back, but it still was overwhelming. sad. she dipped her head to the acknowledgement of learning herbs later, stomach hurting from having to actually confront the emotions she had been stuffing down since the medicine cat and.. new medicine cat apprentice were appointed. ' i'm not.. mad at you. or berrypaw. or anyone here, except for myself. ' she swallowed down a sob before continuing.

' it's just.. i worked so hard. i worked really really hard, and i saw things no normal cat would have seen. for stars sake, i almost had to lop a cat's tail off..! ..and, you know.. you know what i did. everything i did for this clan. ' twitching her ear, cobwebpaw's eyes flashed with pain. ' and then minkpaw.. minkpaw left me. she left, over this. this starsdamned medicine cat role. she was my damn best friend and she LEFT ME. ' cobwebpaw sunk down, holding back loud sobs. ' i'm angry at her. '