[Pending] Fox

[val]

In their presence, any cat would feel small.

Keen eyes gaze at you, judging you for your worth. You know you are not the first cat to come here - nor will you be the last. But you've come with a mission, and all you have to do is sell yourself.

"What makes you stand out from the rest of the cats who want another chance?"

Being scrutinized is no new feeling.

His jaw tenses and his tail flails briefly before he tucks it against his side. He inhales slowly, taking a preparatory breath. A smart remark rests on the tip of his tongue, and he bites it back before it can fester and take off.

Because I made a mistake. Because death brings me no rest. Because I think I miss living. Because I want to try again. Because I need to see my son.

"My son is mourning and unwell and I'm the only one who's bothered to notice or even try to help," he answers finally. "He's struggling all alone. He needs me to be there for him."

But that, to him, seems too short of an answer. What will he do, once he's back with his son? What makes this different from any other bee-brain passing under the wardens' gazes?

"I was just over fifty moons when I died. I had no mate. No kits of my own - except my adopted son. No friends, either." He clenches his jaw, grimacing while he speaks. "I know many cats have died with less, but I wish I could have had more personal achievements." He hesitates before adding, "I've found so many things to live for now that I've died. I want to serve a clan again - properly, this time."

While he explained himself, he looked down at his paws, allowed the words to come to his mind freely, and carefully studied them before letting them pass to his mouth and be spoken. Now, he lifts his gaze and musters up the best of his conviction. "I want to redeem myself."

Could he? From what?

"I know some of the mistakes I've made are unforgivable. I accept that, now. But I'm capable of doing good. I've saved kits from sinkholes, and tried to comfort apprentices in their aftermaths. I've been empathetic toward rule-breaking apprentices, and I did my best to train those who'd been abandoned by the warriors of the clan. Alive, I could do the same, and so much more."

If you only give me a chance. A second chance. He held his phantom breath, waiting to hear their criticisms. Waiting to hear their denial - or approval. Doubt seeps into his heart.

[Kix]

Dasiypool
StarClan

A starry mass emerged from the mist beyond the clearing the tom was sitting in. The lilac point sauntered to take a stand somewhat in front of the cat as they spoke their story. She'd seen that he had something to say before the start but seemed to have stopped himself. Curiosity had her wanting to know what he had wanted to initially say. No use asking for it since they didn't deem it important enough to speak it, she would never know what it was. As she listened to him speak, giving him his moments to say what he had to say before they threw in their own words she thought of one thing, pity. Her pity was one of malice it was more genuine as it was clear the one before her did have some form of guilt in him. "Every cat is bound to make mistakes here and then it is a thing that makes up life but not many cats seem too keen on trying to actually fix those said mistakes" she started. "I've seen that you've tried to make amends for one that involved young cats, even if you were told to do so, you did so with genuine feelings rather than just to please someone and get on with it" Now she had her own little question for the cat that chose to stand before them with their wish. "How exactly do you plan to redeem yourself? Something tells me that your original clan might not be so willing to take you back if you were to be given a second chance"

@narcissus

[taillow]

Oh, so now he was sorry? Fury rippled underneath the pelt of the former ThunderClan medicine cat as she stalked out from the darkness, blue-gray eyes nothing more than sharp ice chips. Snowleopard had heard the whispers of this cat and how he had wronged her Clan. The crimes were nothing she could speak against though, considering her own - but at least hers had been because of no other choice. This cats crimes, however...

"Every cat has kin who are struggling and alone - that doesn't make you any different than the spirits we see here every day, so do not speak as if it does." What a pathetic opening statement; it only served to make Snowleopard even more furious. Why this cat had come expecting that opening line to win over any of the wardens, the white-and-black bengal-marked she-cat was unsure. Daisypool was being much too soft on this fool as far as she was concerned.

"I commend your ability to recognize your short-comings, but Daisypool is correct; ThunderClan will not likely take you back, and all of that "good" you did for those cats will have been for nothing. Sure, you could just as easily join another Clan, but what redemption is there in seeking that easy way out? Seems to me like you are running from your crimes instead of facing and owning up to them." Snowleopard had little patience for cats like the tom before her.

"I won't go as far as to say you are... completely irredeemable, but if you were to go back, you would have a lot of cats after your head. After all, instead of taking that chance to work to improve you... what? Went missing? Disappeared into the mist like the slew of failed high ranks before you? How will this time be any different?"

[ @Kix @narcissus @/third warden ]

[Rose]

Dewkit
She/Her | StarClanner

Innocent, she looked. Naive, small, new to this world. Alas, regardless of her looks, Dewkit had spent many years on this plane of the dead. Wise beyond her appearances. The small, fluffy molly shimmered into view silently. She sat in the back, unblinking blue eyes fixated on the most recent of beseechers.

She cared not for his faults, cared not for what mistakes he had made. No doubt he had already faced the consequences, if he was here. There was one thing she cared about, and it was respecting youths. This former ThunderClanner faced a test now. Would he shun her for her supposed lack of age, like that Moonfoot cat had, or would he keep his maw sealed?

Ever watchful, Dewkit kept her lips sealed for multiple heartbeats. Daisypool had spoken, Snowleopard had spoken. Her expression was shuttered, a mask, a facade that betrayed nothing of the thoughts swirling within.

"You need more a reason to go back than to fix someone else's life for them." Not exactly his wording, but it had certainly caught her interest. Either way, she was here now. "Fifty moons is a lot of time - you had your turn to serve your Clan properly. But here you are, telling me that in fifty moons, you made no connections - only accomplished to land yourself in trouble. Why attempt to go back now when there is no guarantee of your health, no guarantee that death will not reign over you again, when there is no guarantee that you will be able to return and redeem yourself. Why not seek to be born into a Clan anew?"

[ @narcissus - Fox / @/Kix - Daisypool / @/reiya - Snowleopard | Sorry if this makes no sense ]

[val]

So here was this lilac cat who was pretty calm. He didn't know her name, but judging by her words, she knew him, or at least his history. He wondered if that was just inherent Warden knowledge, or if she'd been watching him. He probably preferred the former.

How exactly do you plan to redeem yourself?

He opened his mouth to reply but was cut off quickly by a more fiery spirit. His ears flicked back to lay against his skull as he listened to her scathing denunciation. He disagreed with a lot of things she said - on the basis of truth, some of her words fell. Getting into a spat over it, however, sounded like a very dumb thing to do right now. The sort of thing that made these cats laugh in his face and tell him to hit the road.

So he swallowed whatever biting remarks he had, and he turned his attention onto the third phantom. A kit.

She certainly didn't speak like a kit. Maybe death does that to you. He wouldn't know. It definitely didn't make him any smarter, but then again, he hadn't been here for long.

Taking a deep breath, he chose to address the second's concerns first, considering how demanding she had seemed. Before he spoke, he quickly reminded himself not to linger on her bias. Plenty of cats would treat him the same if he got the chance to live again, and fighting constantly over it would only wear him down. No, he had to get used to it. Unfortunately. Or not.

"I am not running from my crimes. If I wanted to do that, I would have asked to be reborn. Nor did I intentionally leave my clan." Glancing at the kit, he added, "Being reborn would mean that I, or the...new me would have no memory of my mistakes, too. If I don't have that, how can I redeem myself? So, no, I don't wanna be reincarnated." Besides. Being a kit all over again sounded like it sucked. Majorly.

"I made a promise to my son. Apologies for wanting to fulfill it." He couldn't help himself on that one. He turned his attention to the first Warden. She'd asked a good question, and now he would answer it. "If you all gave me one more chance, I could have fifty more moons to my life. I'm not saying I will, but that's a lot of time. So much time to give every part of myself to anyone who needs it." To redeem myself? "My mistake was letting my guard down. Believing I could have control - but specifically, letting the untrained get caught in the crossfire. If you all would let me down, I would redeem myself by making sure it never happened again. Making sure no young fall through the cracks, or are abused, or neglected. To always keep one eye open, just for them."

"It doesn't matter who takes me in. I taught those I could reach in ThunderClan, and they'll have those lessons as long as they remember them." He remembered his apprentices. They had to be warriors by now. "I can't fix my mistakes. But I can make sure they never happen again as long as I'm there. Nobody in power will have oversights. I'll train every apprentice - hell, even kits - so they won't be vulnerable."

He could have worded that better. He just hoped it was an acceptable reason for them all. "I was the one who made that mistake. I'm the only one who cares hard enough to prevent it, now." There. Finishing statement. They should be grateful he didn't use those big, sad eyes the hound always used when it wanted food from the Twoleg. Back when he was still trapped there.

@Kix @reiya @Rose sorry guys for the long post orz

[Kix]

Daisypool
StarClan

Of course she was soft on the one that stood before them, unlike the other it seemed that Dasiypool could tell how sincere the other was being. It seemed the other was responding to this one with nothing but pure emotions, guess it was expected if it was your clan. After all, if it was someone with the same situation coming from her old clan, she’d react a bit differently but still with logic.. If the other watched the actions of this cat then they’d see the other tried to make amends with the affected apprentices. Would have witnessed them trying to fix the wrongs they did before they had evidently vanished off into the night. Something that Daisy had went to the trouble of looking into before she jumped in on this whole ordeal. She saw no malice in the others mistakes, it might have been a dumb mistake but it wasn’t made with intent to harm. Emotions were not what was needed here, more so it was logic and sense of if this cat felt he truly deserved a second chance. To see if he had the resolve and ambition to do what he said and not sit wasting their opportunity. ”I can tell how sincere you feel with your words” it was true, with how she was understanding his words. It might have been a bad choice to have brought untrained apprentices with him but if reason was put into it, the responsibility should have been on all the adults involved, not just one cat. ”Trying to fix your mistakes is what so few try to do nowadays, As mentioned before, most tend to run away to avoid the consequences and avoid the anger of those who got wronged but you stayed even for a bit to try and fix things even if in the end you vanished off into the horizon.” Dasiypool already had her answer for this cat, but she did want to know one more thing and hopefully he’d have the answer. ”As of right now, I’m inclined to say yes, but I want to ask one question. What are your plans if the other clans denied your request to join?”
@taillow @Rose @narcissus

[BEAR.]

[ @taillow @Rose ]

[Rose]

Dewkit
She/Her | StarClanner

Blue hues remained intent on the former ThunderClanner, ears pricked and attentive. She was listening - this cat had not bored her just yet. Being reborn would mean that the memories could be regained, but he was correct. He would not be himself, not fully. Just a portion - and Dewkit was pleased to know that he acknowledged that. Redemption could only be found in his own body, in his former life.

'I made a promise to my son. Apologies for wanting to fulfill it . . . Making sure no young fall through the cracks, or are abused, or neglected. To always keep one eye open, just for them.'

Dewkit rose to her paws, tail swishing behind her. Daisypool was already more inclined towards saying yes, and Dewkit didn't care enough to see a problem with it. Snowleopard had not yet spoken, so the grey kit figured she might as well. "You made a promise to your son." She repeated, voice carrying. "And you've made a promise here to keep an eye out for all youngsters. Fulfill these when you return, for if you do not, you can kiss your renewed life goodbye." She only cared about the neglected, the young.

That was where her concerns lied, and this cat had appeased to them. If the other two Wardens did not let him through, that was on them. With her answer given, Dewkit turned and left.

[ @narcissus - Fox / @/Kix - Daisypool / @taillow - Snowleopard | Dewkit has given her yes o/ ]

[taillow]

It was always the goody-spirits of StarClan that acted soft with their bellies up in the air. A fierce look was sent Daisypool's way as she cooed and coddled the cat before them, praising them for whatever "making amends" was apparently enough to fix their grievous mistake that had nearly cost the lives of young cats. But the dark forest cat could at least... understand a bit of what this cat was saying.

Annoyance flashed in her gaze though as she glanced back at him. "Every dead cat has made promises before - that makes you no different," came the bitten out remark as Snowleopard watched him answer the other questions. She had half a mind to toss him out simply for the tone but she held her tongue, instead letting her searing gaze linger on him.

But the last part...? A rage flared in Snowleopard's eyes as she scoffed. "You're the only one who cares? A bold statement." Bold statements didn't sway much here because the wardens heard them every day - though it seemed enough to swing Daisypool into potentially saying yes. "You know, I was going to consider giving you the chance, at the very least, to prove me wrong. Perhaps see that your words are genuine. But I've seen plenty of cats who care, who are helping, who haven't needed you to do it. So, my answer is no."

With that the spirit stepped back, taking a seat. There was still a chance this tom could weasel his way back to living if he got the one more yes that was needed - and normally she would leave, but her curiosity had gotten the better of her. She wanted to see if Daisypool would grant this cat's wish for redemption, if she would be tricked by his words.

[ @Rose @Kix @narcissus - snowleopard's answer is no! ]

[val]

Deny him??

Well. For one, that'd suck. Probably reasonable, if he wanted to listen to that needling voice nagging at the back of his mind; who'd let a defector into their clan? Besides the other things. But that's not the point, because really, would nobody want him? (like that's new.) (hey shut up edgy, whiny, pessimistic voice. I'm trying to think here.)

He cleared his throat again, stalling to let his mind compose his, no doubt, very eloquent reply. "Well... if that happened, then there's still cats outside I could help. Would help. And I'd keep trying. To get in."

Wide-eyed, he blankly processed the dead kit's words. They hardly registered in his brain. Yes? Yes??! His ghost bones felt like they'd turned to sludge, weak and rotted.

Short-lived was his stay in seventh heaven.

If his bones had been slushy snow before, they froze now into rigid ice. Can't say I didn't expect that. But. Ouch. Snowleopard's denial struck a chord of fear - though it'd definitely been there before - into his heart. He tried not to let the rejection get to him just yet. Maybe there's still hope...?

With this in mind, he turned his attention back to Daisypool. Please please please say yes I'll never denounce the stars or call you guys smelly spirits again. Probably. He didn't know if he was actually capable of breathing, being currently dead and all, but it certainly felt like he was holding his breath, waiting for her final answer.

Nervous jokes aside, the terror of coming so close yet failing once again was so mind-numbing that all he could manage was a dead stare. His entire existence felt frail, like a broken bird's fluttering heartbeat caught between his paws. Laid before them was his life so poor that one condemned him to 'paradise' instead. (Would that have been mercy, in a different light? But he chose this - so was it?) He wanted to grip somebody, hold on and believe he didn't just lie to his son again.

@/rose @taillow @Kix