[Bean]

Rainpaw
He/They - 13 moons

Tw - post contains mentions of anxiety, depression self-hate, thoughts of suicide, repeating words [slightly]... probs missin something.

 

13 moons.
13 damn moons. And he wasnt even close to becoming a warrior. Was he really that terrible at life? Starsdamnit. The one-eyed tabby had been working so hard to look happy lately, and it was taking its toll. He was bitter, and tired. so. damn. tired. SHUT UP he wanted to scream. But he couldn't. It was a burden. He was a burden.

Rainpaw heard a voice. Wisteriaheart. He almost laughed. Training? Like that could help him at this point. The blue tabby made himself get up. Pain. It hurt. Living. His one blue eye was half-closed. He hadn't been sleeping lately. No. He didn't want to. What, he didn't know. Anything. Everything. Pain. The blue apprentice grit his teeth before forcing on a smile.

"I caaan teach... but it depends," he said, trying to hide the strain in their voice. Like they would be useful. He hardly knew anything. Useless. He was useless. They flicked their half-tail left and right. What if they said no? What would happen then? It would prove he was useless. It was true. They knew it was true. Everything was true. He was useless. Useless useless useless.