[Fish]

[CENTER]

"Right just go and kill a kid, one of the only ones that does anything around in this star-forsaken clan!" Adderpaw said sneering at the other. Did an adult really just get angry enough to threaten to kill a kid that tread on their pride? Maybe she should have asked Starclan to send someone level-headed to talk to, or who wouldn't blindly threaten her life like this. Or maybe it was a bad idea to talk to the stars at all but at least it gave her an idea how some of the dead were like. Not that she believe this cat on the whole dream thing. She would have to see herself show up wet in the waking to actually believe any of that.

"Listen I am not asking for our clan to be pampered. That would just turn us into basically kittypets with an extra step and that could be worse than what we have already. But! What I'm asking is just for some kind of guidance.." She paused for a moment to collect her thoughts. What did Adderpaw want from them truly that could help their clan. Now that she was face to face with a cat that could potential help her clan the thoughts escaped her.

Take a step back, breath.

With a deep breath Adderpaw continued with a calmer tone. "Listen, I know I've come off very harsh but you got to see it from where I am coming from. We are drowning and it seems like only one clan gets the reap the benefit of the stars. Of their ancestors while the others do... Goodness I don't know what, then I get pulled in here with a very threatening surrounding presumably made by you. It only drives the hatred. I am sorry if I have pushed you too hard but I just wish to help my clan and someone needs to be proactive when the others won't be. I need to be the one who speaks up our clans anger." Adderpaw wasn't sure if this deescalation would work at this point as she hounded on them pretty hard, but at least for her own sake she needed to calm down, to actually think without emotion.

"Who is this rotten bird and who are the wardens. Is this something that our clan was supposed to teach me and failed doing so? Is there a way that you could... I 'dunno, make some clouds part or do some funky magic to make others see the stars still are watching us. I hope that something like that could improve moral. It would certainly do so mine... Or is it that tied up you can't..?" Adderpaw realized she was asking a lot when she knew so little. Yet even if the other cat thought she was stupid for asking these questions who was truly the stupid one. The one who dared to ask and be wrong or the one who never asked and went on not knowing the truth.

"I just worry right? With the shifting tides of leaders that if someone finally broke through and made, I 'dunno, a rebellion and killed Fadingsun or any other leader then became a leader our clan would be irreversibly broken and divided for good. This is why I can't push for anything to push leaders out of positions with force of words or action. This game of life, of clan stability, seems to be a careful one to play but recently everyone's been throwing rocks at the ice. If I join in, then it might finally break... This is my fear. The divide may never heal back to a whole Riverclan. Then some clan may come in to finally wipe us off the map." Adderpaw paused for a moment as she brewed in what she said. She shuttered to have actually said out her true fears aloud. She never spoken this nary to a soul, but in front of one she finally did. They might think her insane for thinking this but actually being in the trenches gave her this feeling. Would these so called wardens do anything, or was that rotten bird blocking them too?

"Add to that I am only nine moons right now and if I took a positions of leadership SOMEHOW, I'd probably be killed the next day. And before you ask, while I see other good cats I do not see leaders. Fadingsun so far is the best we got." It had to be said. She loved this clan but sometimes it was like loving the snake as a mouse. A fool's game.

"The only action plan I got going forth, if that is what you care to hear, is to keep proving myself to my clan and maybe become to deputy or join the lionhearts and become a close advisor to the leader. Why not try to be an advisor now? No one respects an apprentice's view as much as someone older. I do not say that in 'woe is me' I say that from seeing how these cats act. I need to wait to play my 'game' unfortunately." The star cat could no actually her all they wanted but Adderpaw wouldn't believe a word they said. Too many a time did an apprentice get shot down by a warrior because they were an apprentice. Hells, it happened to an apprentice who was old enough to be a LIONHEART, why would Addderpaw be the exception?

[FONT=Verdana]"But I digress, who is the rotten bird. Who are the wardens. Can you do any small tricks at all to inspire the clan?" Hopefully she hadn't tarnished her rapour with this star cat, but someone needed to speak up... Stars someone needed to speak up.
@dino.