[Mauve]

Originally Posted by Celestial

(( so much loss. Rowan just currently lost her son gorsekit and I'm planning on having her have lost him during this walk so... Ehh ))

It most likely wasn't the time to have brought up her former clan or leader, but if she wasn't going to confront it she wasn't sure how heatherfur was going to heal from it. The clans had been at war for some time now, although it was thunderclan and windclan war had seemingly gravitated to riverclan and windclan. Fallenstar had strongly expressed his disgust in the fact windclan had attacked thunderclan with the power of two clans and an unfair advantage. Her muscles rippled at the memory of fallenstar and blazingstar getting into it at the previous gathering. Allowing the thought of war to slip away she allowed her shiver to get flicked off the end of her tail. The orange and white tabby padded through the foliage only listening to heatherfur, the pain that seemed to circulate the she cat was deafening. Rowanflower slowed her pace again in order to fall into step with the windclan she cat one more time. It was clear to see she had both cabin feaver and a tad of homesickness. Despite having only met heatherfur the day previous she allowed her tail to settle on the tabby so haunches as they walked side by side sharing the silence with each other for a singular moment. The sorrow being emitted from heatherfur was only confirmed as she began to speak again.

' ' wether or not blazingstar hates you, all of riverclan will be behind you ' ' she said gently turning to examine heatherfur closely ' ' I cannot guarantee they do not hate you, nor can I say they do, the only thing you can really do is ask. But I don't suppose you'd ever want to do that ' ' she added briefly allowing a yawn to pull on her jaws and squint her eyes. It wasn't her first time with a Cat who radiated such a deep emotion such as heatherfur was doing now. It reminded her of tumblestep, it was almost sickening to think about the grey tom now and the relations they shared. She flicked an ear trying to dismiss the thoughts and focus on heatherfur. Her tail gently swished by her ankles as she padded down the ditch and up the other side with little to no effort.

As the river came into view she allowed the scent to fill her mouth and cause a brief head rush, it was the freshest scent found anywhere, not even the winds on windclans moor could compete with riverclans fresh mountain runoff in newleaf. The river would run through the lan washing away all of leafbare with it, it even seemed to wash away the feeling of anger towards blazingstar and the way he had looked at the young cat at the gathering... Maybe even the hanging sense there was depression in the air. ' ' you a riverclan medicne cat who's never swam before ' ' she finished her question turning to face heatherfur with a raised eyebrow. Whatever heatherfur planned to say next rowanflower refused to hear, it hurt her to know many of the cats in her life appeared so broken and almost self hating. She slipped down onto the sand allowing the cooling effects of it cool her paws before she settled down on a few river rounded pebbles off to the side. ' ' it shouldn't be hard for riverclan cats ' ' which you are. ' ' but drypaws... I'm not really sure how that works ' ' she said with a faint hint of amusement in her voice. She couldn't stand the idea of a riverclan cat who's never swam before, made her skin crawl with some unknown feeling. ' ' we can't have a medicine cat who can't swim.. Now can we? Once we get that windclan scent washed out. You'll be one of the best riverclan medicine cats I've ever seen ' ' she meowed encouragingly.

It had been quite some time since Heatherfur had felt actual companionship. Not since she had left WindClan, and while there were some in RiverClan who accepted her without hesitation - mainly because they had no other choice with no one to heal them - she didn't feel close to any of them yet. Not like she was sure Surgestorm had with each member of WindClan. Medicine cats were suppose to have a special bond with their Clanmates, someone that they could rely on and trust blindly to keep them healthy. With this recent loss hanging over her head, the tabby felt even more disconnected from her Clan. After all, Surgestorm wasn't RiverClan. She was sure this clouded opinions on her across the board, but Heatherfur couldn't bring herself to care. But when she felt Rowanflower's tail land across her back, something shifted. A small, faint trace of kindness blossomed around her stone of a heart, and for once she felt as though someone might actually care about her as more than just a medicine cat. The last cat she had expected this to be was Rowanflower, of course, given that Fallenstar still didn't trust her all that well. But it was something, and Heatherfur wouldn't question it when it was the one thing she needed the most in the midst of all the grief and loss she was suffering.

"I just hope that StarClan knew what they were doing when they led me here," she murmured, mostly to herself but it was just loud enough for her companion to hear if she listened closely enough. Now as they stood at the edge of the passing water, a new nervous feeling over took Heatherfur. She carefully followed behind the deputy, her paws sinking into the cool sand beneath her. She hadn't ever really felt sand before, the closest being the soft dust in the WindClan nursery from years of being smoothed down by countless paws. "I guess it wasn't really a priority since rabbits never swam either," the tabby joked, figuring that masking her pain with humor was the best way to avoid it for the time being. Her pale green eyes studies the pebbles before her and she cautiously lowered her haunches down, the cool surface of the stones foreign to her bushy pelt. She knew at one point this would become natural for her, and perhaps even exciting, but now that she was just mere whisker lengths away from the current, its spray reaching the edge of her fur, she began to second guess her previous notions.

Heatherfur turned her head to look from the water before her to Rowanflower, her whiskers twitching. "I guess at some point I will need to learn. I wouldn't be much use to any cat right now if they were to drown," she agreed, nodding as she spoke and focused her gaze back onto the current. It looked fast, as though if she were to stick one paw in it would carry her down the bends and away from the safety of the shore. Heatherfur knew this wasn't the case, however she hadn't ever really been this close to a body of water in her life that she could remember - there were no streams on WindClan's moors. "Are you offering to teach me?" she asked the deputy, this time keeping her eyes on the river. A part of her was excited, half of her heart wrapped up in the anticipation and the thrill of learning a new skill. But the other half was coated in fear as she absentmindedly stuck a single paw towards the water. It's cold current washed over her paw and the medicine cat quickly drew it back, eyes widening in shock. It was enough to momentarily cut through the dark clouds of grief that hovered over her, and she shook her head slightly. "Oh, StarClan, you didn't prepare me for this," she gasped, her heart starting to race just a bit faster.