[Rani]

Bleedingpaw
Shadowclan Apprentice | He/Him | 12 Moons

Just a Scratch | Shadow Fiend | Hulk SMASH! | Mind Reader

Nestled in his nest, lightly kneading his skinned rabbit pelt, Bleedingpaw could help but stare at a familiar pelt across the den from him. Cat after cat had vanished, even before their shared mother had betrayed them. The golden bengal was close with few, especially after how shallow he discovered love to truly be, one last harsh lesson from Lostspark but.... Well he couldnt help but feel guilty for it.



Once upon a time he'd wanted desperately to be accepted and loved by his siblings, shying away due to fear he'd disturbed them by his closeness to their mother. But now that that relationship had been marred by hurt and betrayal still he stayed away, only lingering by Sleepysunrise. Why?


....Maybe it was fear they too would hurt him like Lostspark did. He could handle more Moonpaws but for someone else to get close and use that (intentionally or not) to hurt him? It'd break what fragile self was left.




But doing nothing out of constant fear of that occurring, letting chances rot until things potentially became too late..... Caution turned cowardice was not something Bleedingpaw could tolerate in himself.
So he eventually stood, wobbling his way over (hissing apologies to the cats his wild movements disturbed) until he stood by Wispypaw. It was early enough most were awake, simply winding down for the day, yet his still hesitated, worried about disturbing her before speaking. "I guess its just us left as apprentices now.... I- Do you....." The toms words hushed, even as they were ripped from his throat, an insecure piece of himself desperate to know. "Do you also feel like they've left us behind sometimes?....."


They, the disabled ones, they the most impacted of the siblings were the only two left as apprentices and though Bleedingpaw had expected it.... Well it still stung. Sleepysunrise seemed to tolerate him if he made the effort to approach her but Quietraven, Birdecho and Cinderspark.... They might as well be 'dead' like their mother was for all he saw them anymore. Did Wispypaw have more of a relationship he wondered? Or was she too left behind.


@Kix