[alec]

/ @zBlaze @Peril @glitch @carmen @paris @Bean i jus kinda mentioned everyon blaze did i hope its all good! /

it was out, she had said it. she had rejected goldfish and everything she stood for, but most importantly she had rejectedly riverclan, out loud and for real. there was no coming back. to appearing in camp like nothing happened, no taking a quarter moon to cool off and then returning, no, this was it. and no matter how desperately she wished that she didnt have to speak these words to goldfish she did and she immediately felt weight lift off her shoulders. she lifted her gaze to finally look back at goldfish, whos face scrunched up just a tiny bit, accompanied by a unmistakable shake in her limbs. minkpaw didnt make a move. not yet. her eyes darted around the immediate surroundings, it prbably made her look even worse, but she was scanning for herbs. mentally preparing for what she knew wass to come. preparing for something goldfish wouldnt keep in positive memory. stars she hoped goldfish wouldnt project this horrible experience on her kits, even if just subconciously, this was not something her kits should be bothered with. they should grow up happy and healthy and not have to feel like nagging discomfort of their mother remembering a stupid selfish apprentice that had just so happened to make her big stupid selfish decision right before their birth.
goldfish staggered back with a yelp, and before minkpaw could reach her the warrior was on the ground, shaky legs having given out beneath her.
"calm down, goldfish." she mewed, neutral, she was a neutral party now, not goldfishs enemy or the cat that had betrayed her for no reason or her friend, no, from this moment until minkpaw was sure the kits and goldfish were save there was no barrier in between her and the bi coloured warrior "you need to calm down." she repeated, turning away from goldfish to observe their surroundings again. maybe the wording was bad, maybe she shouldnt tell her super pregnant super disappointed friend to calm down when she had every right to be upset. but minkpaw couldnt imagine kitting under she had, subconciously or just by chance, chosen a pretty nice spot, bushes and shrubs possibly hiding them from direct view, the grass looked dark and cool like it didnt get a lot of sun but still pretty well. goldfish seemed to get lost in the pain, minkpaw chance to distance herself from the other feline and hurry towards the more dense part of this little clearing. the hazy memory of briefly taking note of a herb she knew while mindlessly wandering flashed in her mind and she sped up her steps even more. chervil yes. practically the only thing she knew to help with kitting, right infront of dirtied white tipped paws. she roughly closed her jaws around a couple of the sweet smelling fern like leaves before yanking her head up, before stumbling back with the force, the quiet snap of thin stems a immediate indicator for what had happened. the apprentice loner had hoped to uproot the plant but apperantly newleaf had no treated it as well as some other plants so she dropped the maw full of leaves to quickly dig up some of the roots. minkpaw had half expected herself to panic and let her movement turn from controlled to frantic but it was like her mind had quieted down a bit, she had a job and she was going to do this job as well as she could. no mess ups because she was being silly.
roots between her jaws she turned to race back to goldfish. a good sturdy stick was easily found but lanvender to calm goldfish wouldve been a nice thing.. but it had already taken too long to dig up the chervil root so there was no way she had enough time to wander off in search for lanvender. "goldfish focus on me okay?" she instructed after dropping the roots and stick, absentmindedly pawing at them to try and get some of the dirt off. "you can eat this, it would help with the pains." she pushed the stick towards her, goldfish had been around for long enough to not need instructions for a stick. however, if she appeared to be clenching her jaws overly hard but refusing the stick she'd say something.
"deep breaths yeah?" minkpaws eyes were on goldfish, spottedstream almost forgotten about, breathing now louder and deeper to suggest a pace for goldfish.