Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong -------------- Her eyes opened. Another restless night, and another day with a restless feeling in her heart. Her decorated nest of feathers and flowers had been thoroughly dismantled as she had tossed and turned, and Sweetsong sighed tiredly as she sat up in her nest, shaking the loose moss and clinging feathers from her pelt one slow scrap at a time. The soft breathing beside her made her green eyes turn toward the pretty diluted calico. Fallenwish was still sleeping, and Sweetsong watched her sister, albeit a later litter, with a warm fondness in her gaze. But her eyes trailed down to Fallenwish's leg, and the odd fidgeting in the she-cat's sleeping body. Sweetsong hadn't missed the scowling contortion of Fallenwish's face as she slept. She was so...emotive. It was though she had smelled something foul. So with a small white paw, Sweetsong prodded Fallenwish's shoulder. "Fallenwish?" She whispered, "Fallenwish, it's dawn..." Once more her eyes slid down over the leg. "How about we take a morning walk to strengthen your leg a little? Hm? Maybe even test it a little by catching some breakfast?" She chuckled with humor making her eyes glow. "I love how cool the river is in the morning, don't you?" @shoomy! |
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Her last sight of the dream was a cold, gray face. Before she knew it, her vision had blurred into nothing, finding herself back in her cozy nest. "Ge-" Fallenwish opened her eyes, seeing Sweetsong's paw as if it was waking her. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong ------------------ She wasn't convinced by her sister's forced cheer, and she watched worriedly while Fallenwish pulled herself from her nest, but while she did she was quick to pluck the scraps of moss from her sister's pelt with her small white paws as Fallenwish headed outside. Sweetsong followed close, her head tilting to one side as she noticed the heavy limp. Outside of camp the air just felt cleaner and fresher, and Sweetsong was ready to start bounding with the butterflies when Fallenwish stopped suddenly and spoke. Sweetsong listened, her expression changing from worry to horror to anxiety. She looked down at her paws, plucking the grass with her claws. "I wish there was a place for the cats like us..." Sweetsong whispered, "Cats who aren't medicine cats, but they aren't warriors either...I'd call them Herbalists. Cats specially picked and qualified to keep herb patrols flowing and to assist in healing after battles...but something like that is far out of line for us to suggest...I don't think I'll...be medicine cat either." Sweetsong forced back a tearful sob. But the topic of Poisonberry and StarClan made her pelt bristle uneasily. "Definitely...not a dream from StarClan," She whispered, her eyes clouding over once more with anxiety. How was Poisonberry getting through? Was it because of her? "I-I saw her as well...but as a shadow almost..." She hesitated, glancing at Fallenwish nervously. "But I was..I was in someone else's dream." "But what..what if it does?" Sweetsong asked, "I want to be a medicine cat too...it's a shared dream for us both. But I've already sullied my chances...Birdsnow...she's angry with me and...while I understand why, I feel she overreacted...yet I can't blame her...so much burden and pressure was thrown onto her shoulders..." Tears began to fall freely, "But if I still have a chance...what if who I am seeing...if that is shared...that would only jeopardize my chances more...." But she owed Fallenwish her honesty. Fallenwish shared hers, and Sweetsong hated keeping secrets. She had more than enough...with Fallenwish being one of the only cats who knew of some. Like her vegetarianism. Her dreamwalking. Her fears and deepest worries... "I-I was...I found myself speaking to Crowpaw..." She said finally, her voice so low that it was barely perceptible. The worst part had yet to be said. A part that she knew would shock and anger Fallenwish. She had sustained an injury in the recent attack, and as Sweetsong's eyes lifted, they rested on Fallenwish's injured limb, her eyes two liquid pools of sadness and remorse. "Of ThunderClan...." @hades. |
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I like your Herbalist idea. Kinda sounds a lot like just being a medicine cat, though." Fallenwish said. She thought for a moment, sitting under the shade of a willow tree. "You know what?" Fallenwish said, dragging her claw through the dirt, which was damp from the melted snow. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong ------------------ She sat beside Fallenwish, watching the drawing in the earth with a muted gaze. Her thoughts had wandered to Crowpaw; Was he alright? How was she going to tell him someone knew? Even if her secret was safe, it was only dreams, so why did it have to be a secret? Was she breaking the warrior code more? "Birdsnow is angry with me," Sweetsong choked out. "I was...found talking to a lost kittypet a few weeks ago...I tried to talk reason; That there were ways to deal with trespassers without aggression...I was telling the kittypet that she wasn't supposed to be there...but..but then Fadingsun came upon us...saying we were in trouble..and then Birdsnow came..." Sweetsong huddled down into a ball, her paws over her eyes. "Wh-when she said...the two cats she had been considering making medicine cats...h-had disappointed her..." Sweetsong choked out another sob, "Sh-She was talking about m-me and Cobwebpaw...we were both there, just...talking to a stranger...for only a few breaths..." "I made a mistake, and ruined my chances....what if Birdsnow finds out I am speaking to someone from ThunderClan? I-in my dreams? And so soon after the recent attack! What if she casts me out? Exiles me? At least if she kills me I can be where I belong...r-right?" Sweetsong turned an anguished gaze onto Fallenwish. "What if I'm just fooling myself? What if I'm not meant to be a medicine cat? I'm not perfect...I'm less a warrior than a rogue is a kittypet...maybe I should...maybe I should just be a kittypet..." She dropped her face into her paws, sobbing softly. What could she do? Birdsnow's wrath was her own fault. Had she been a true warrior, she would have...she would have...hurt Melody. But why? What did she really do to deserve that? Cross an invisible boundary she wasn't aware of, an innocent mistake? Sweetsong felt sick at the idea of hurting someone who didn't deserve such a foul treatment. Did she really belong in such a vicious life? Did she really want to watch her friends and family be hurt because of pride and prejudice? No...but she knew the warrior code...and she couldn't just leave Crowpaw like that.... @hades. |
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Fallenwish could have been there. she could have fixed it. She could have told Melody that it wasn't safe right off the bat, or at the very least take the blame. Why was she never there for her friends or family? Maybe that's why Poisonberry turned out to be the way she was. Maybe Fallenwish hadn't been nice enough. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong ------------- "I hope you're right, Fallen." Sweetsong murmured, though it was evident that the small pale ginger she-cat was not convinced. "I would...like to have some hope but..." Her voice trailed away, "I feel..confused." Leaving RiverClan. The very idea made her stomach roil and her throat tighten. She loved her home...even if she didn't like the violence that ran rampantly from time to time. And she had cats here, who liked her, who wanted her to stay. That she wanted to be around for. Boulderpaw, Fallenwish, and Cobwebpaw all held a special place in her heart. Crowpaw too. It would be cruel of her to abandon them because of her fear. "I don't know when she will calm down," Sweetsong replied after a moment. "She hasn't spoken to me since...and I don't want to upset her further..." Sweetsong shook her head, "You'd be a much better medicine cat than I would, Fallenwish. You are loyal to Birdsnow. She needs that more than she needs a cat whose heart is so...dangerously soft..." @hades. |
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"I know I'm right." Fallenwish was terrified of even the consideration that Sweetsong had even a slight chance of leaving. Was that even her room to be scared? No, but she was sure Sweetsong wouldn't leave. That or she was lying to herself. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong ------------------ "But you know how much I struggled with my apprenticeship, Fallenwish..." Sweetsong pouted. "I was held back so much because...because I just couldn't bring myself to hurt anyone...or anything." Sweetsong shook her head. "It was agony to make myself kill the last mouse...to hit as hard as I could. I just don't have it in me..." "Justice...it's not justice. It's neverending cycle of anger and hate..." Sweetsong rose to her paws, trailing behind Fallenwish, "Justice would be to release the grudges created by generations, to shed the past and build a new future where the sins our our ancestors, their mistakes, don't haunt us with every pawstep. It is a hard concept for many...personal feelings overtake reason so..easily." She sighed, "But I fear the battles we fight are becoming...too personal. We were just assaulted...and the only option anyone is going to see is to fight...but for what? Pride we don't have? No, it's always about pride..." Sweetsong frowned deeply, "It isn't hard to put yourself into another's paws...to think about...the why. Why are they angry. What can we do to stop the fighting? Pride kills...humility heals...or I hope it will one day..." Sweetsong looked at Fallenwish, surprise showing. "I never said..I could connect with them. If they wish to speak to me, they will...but I cannot just..talk to them on my own...even though it's just another wish that falls past my grasp." She moved close and pressed her side against her sister's. "If I were a medicine cat, you'd be my first choice in successor." @hades. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Fallenwish closed her eyes for a second, then opened them again. She tried to understand what Sweetsong was thinking and succeeded. She knew who at least some of what she was saying was the fault of her snake of a sister. |
Re: Falling Wishes and Sweeter Dreams
Sweetsong ----------------- "As much as I value your faith in me, sister, I hope you understand that life isn't so black and white. I may not be a medicine cat...therefore I am fine living with that knowledge. There is a path I can take...just as there is one for you to take. You just have to find it." Sweetsong murmured. She watched Fallenwish as she caught herself a fish, and she purred, "A nice catch." Her fishing was a tad different, and Sweetsong let herself rest on her belly, her forelegs slipping into the water up to her elbows. Her haunches were anchored, but Sweetsong held a face of concentration for a moment, and then she relaxed visibly, "I let the fish decide." She whispered, "I keep my paws just a mouse-length apart, claws sheathed so I don't prick them..." She felt the slippery bodies pass and swish around her paws, but only when she felt one linger, did she slowly release her claws, and she clapped her paws together, sending a spray of water up into the air, but as Sweetsong pulled herself away from the water, she held a fish between her paws, grasped with the small claws on either side. It still flopped and flailed, but she held tight, setting it on the grass and holding it there with a paw. Her eyes closed, and she bent her head to whisper, "I'm sorry for taking your life...but it isn't without reason." Just as the last of the fight left it, and it stopped moving. Sweetsong looked up at Fallenwish, "A couple more, and then we can head home, yes?" @hades. |
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Fallenwish didn't think she was seeing things in black and white. It was something she tried so hard not to do. She needed to be logical. Was she not trying hard enough? She had to be logical- her ability to be that was a gift, but maybe she wasn't trying hard enough. sounded about right to her. All Fallenwish ever tried to do was dramatize everything and think she's being smart. God, she needed to be humbled. |
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