Blizzardwind let out a low growl. Jut wondering if my littermates think about me. But, of course, they don't. They care too much about themselves, lazy little... Somewhat defensively, he continued. I left them, and I wanted to look for them now, but if 50 moons of not seeing a whisker from them, why should I expect things t be different now?
Dawnwhisper sighed softly, their fur brushing against Blizzardwinds as they continue to walk. Dawnwhisper shook their head lightly “sometimes..there’s a little piece in us that hopes cats that never cared for you will one day come around, or even hope that they cared for you all that time..” blinking softly at him Dawnwhisper continued “..maybe that day will come Blizzardwind, but for now you can’t let them drag you down alongside them.” leaning down a bit Dawnwhisper is able to look directly at Blizzardwinds face “and you have cats that care for you.”.
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"I am out with lanterns
looking for myself"
Last edited by Nixey; June 30th, 2021 at 11:02 AM.
Dawnwhisper sighed softly, their fur brushing against Blizzardwinds as they continue to walk. Dawnwhisper shook their head lightly “sometimes..there’s a little piece in us that hopes cats that never cared for you will one day come around, or even hope that they cared for you all that time..” blinking softly at him Dawnwhisper continued “..maybe that day will come Blizzardwind, but for now you can’t let them drag you down alongside them.” leaning down a bit Dawnwhisper is able to look directly at Blizzardwinds face “and you have cats that care for you.”.
He looked up at them. They made it so hard.... for my mother, and for me. I took care of them when our mother failed to. I feel more like an underappreciated father, not a lonely littermate. I see them as the kits that were helpless and hungry, but they aren't kits anymore. Blizzardwind held Dawnwhispers gaze as they looked right in his eyes. They cared for him? Well... he couldn't deny they were starting to grow on him. You do too. He said softly. He appreciated them for the help, and he hoped he could be for them when they needed it, too.
He looked up at them. They made it so hard.... for my mother, and for me. I took care of them when our mother failed to. I feel more like an underappreciated father, not a lonely littermate. I see them as the kits that were helpless and hungry, but they aren't kits anymore. Blizzardwind held Dawnwhispers gaze as they looked right in his eyes. They cared for him? Well... he couldn't deny they were starting to grow on him. You do too. He said softly. He appreciated them for the help, and he hoped he could be for them when they needed it, too.
Dawnwhisper blinked gratefully at Blizzardwind. Sighing, they paused for a moment and angled their ears towards where Blizzardwind had been looking before continuing on “maybe they’ll come looking for you at some point but here you’re appreciated by cats.” Dawnwhisper leaned down as they continued to walk and brushed the side of their head against Blizzardwinds “I appreciate you, Blizzardwind.”.
Dawnwhisper blinked gratefully at Blizzardwind. Sighing, they paused for a moment and angled their ears towards where Blizzardwind had been looking before continuing on “maybe they’ll come looking for you at some point but here you’re appreciated by cats.” Dawnwhisper leaned down as they continued to walk and brushed the side of their head against Blizzardwinds “I appreciate you, Blizzardwind.”.
Blizzardwind shrugged. Maybe. He wasn't banking on those brats every recognizing his existence again, but anything could happen. He smiled a little at Dawnwhisper as they brushed their head against his. Thank you, Dawnwhisper. It's good to know that there is a good egg in your generation, I'd almost lost all hope. All joking aside, he said seriously, I appreciate you, too. I'm sure you'll do wonderful things for RiverClan.
Blizzardwind shrugged. Maybe. He wasn't banking on those brats every recognizing his existence again, but anything could happen. He smiled a little at Dawnwhisper as they brushed their head against his. Thank you, Dawnwhisper. It's good to know that there is a good egg in your generation, I'd almost lost all hope. All joking aside, he said seriously, I appreciate you, too. I'm sure you'll do wonderful things for RiverClan.
Dawnwhisper purred slightly as they quietly thanked Blizzardwind. Bringing their head up as they began to speak “you’ve done great things for Riverclan and I’ll definitely try my best.” their paws brushed along the sand lightly again as they spoke.
Laughter was supposed to be something uplifting, wasn’t it?—but Plumstorm’s rang empty, illustrating ‘tired’ better than any analogy Otter could think up on the spot. Not that either of them needed one. Personal experience was good enough reference, and from that look in the feline’s eyes, she had enough of her own.
“So we just make room.” Ottersplash supposed she was right. “Am I the only one who tries burying it?” His voice came out so light it seemed to waver with the breeze; he wasn’t sure if he wanted Plumstorm to hear or not.
Studying a vibrant sunset and being so unmoved felt like a crime, something Otter should be ashamed of. He made a mental note to describe the breathtaking image—reds and oranges setting the sea on fire—to Wormbite. Worm would appreciate it more…might even smile. He'd like to see that.
Ottersplash regarded Plumstorm with halfway interest as she continued, sensing she stared speaking more about herself whether she was aware or not. Did it feel strange? Being called up in front of RiverClan when they knew of, but couldn’t understand, her grief? He remembered that warrior ceremony. Kestrelstar wove loss into the fabric of her identity, a personal, permanent reminder of what she would carry the rest of her life.
But…maybe Plumstorm wanted that. Maybe it was her own way of ‘making room.’
He met her eyes. ‘Sorry’ wasn’t right and Otter resisted the urge to mutter it. Gotta be stronger than that, the she-cat said. Why? “Because they’re watching?” Otter left ‘they’ ambiguous on purpose. He could have meant their clanmates, their leaders, the dead, or the…missing. That familiar pang in his heart again.
Ginger ears swiveled toward one of the louder waves crashing; it sprayed and sputtered white foam before soaking into the sand. Ottersplash’s resolve cracked a little more. How much empathy could they show each other, really?
“Nothing.” It was the truth. He didn't deserve to feel so...wrong. “Others've gone through a lot worse, I shouldn’t complain.” Coastbreeze’s eyes flashed in his mind—the warmth of his smile so close but just out of reach. Huh, funny, Otter’s vision blurred. Made Lionsbeach look warped. “He didn’t come back. I thought he always would. I thought…” Otter thought he wouldn’t have to flirt with those pesky feelings of abandonment anymore. “…he’s probably fine.”
Turning so he faced Plumstorm more fully, Ottersplash tried to smile, adding to the irony; such heavy words between them. Such eerie serenity in the way they spoke about it: flippant, like they weren’t talking to a complete stranger. “What about you?”
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Hiatus
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Full hiatus except for a couple threads I hope to finish up, ily all <3
A motion out of the corner of her eye caused her to look away from the bird, taking a moment to watch the back end of the kit run away, a feeling of satisfaction settling in at the back of her mind. She was at least getting herself hopefully to safety.
A thought that was quickly replaced with pain as Palepaw swung her head back just in time for the bird to launch itself at her. She steeled herself in place and leapt foward, using the combined momentum to knock the bird to its side, barely feeling the way the the birds beak dug into her shoulder. While this had also knocked herself over, she had been much quicker in getting back up.
She quickly lifted her paw high above her head, remembering what Berryscorch had taught her about this. Claws extended and putting her full weight behind the strike, she swung her paw in a dow ward motion, paw cracking itself on the birds head with a crack, making the bird convulse violently, beak nicking her ear as it gaped before flopping onto the ground.
She stared at it for a moment, watching the last trickles of life bleed with every twitch of the body. Deciding she wasn't taking a chance for it to catch her unaware, she leaned foward and clasped her teeth into it's neck and crushed it before turning to find Petuniakit.
To say she was disappointed was an understatement. She narrowed her eyes at the kit as she desperately was trying to protect..... a pile of shells. She stopped mid step, looking down at her and her previously softened expression hardened into a mask once again. "We're going home. Now. Before something else decides you look tasty".
She turned back towards the gull, eyes carefully scanning the sky for anything else that might be a threat. She spotted another white bird, but it was far enough away to not be a concern yet.
Yet.
With a combination of the bird that wasn't as far away as she would have liked, both of them having injuries, and straight up exhaustion at this point, she wanted to go to head out as quickly as possible, but didn't feel like nit picking at the kit at that particular moment, so for now she'd let her get ready to leave at her own pace, only stepping in if she took too long.
Petuniakit just kept on watching while making sure no stupid bird stole her pile. She still wanted to take them back. Maybe Palepaw could help her. Once the bird was finished she moved out. She poked the bird. Yep it was dead. Awesome!
"That was amazing!", she meowed in excitement. Her wounds hurt, but not as big as the one where a bit of her flesh was missing. It hurt a lot more. She'd need to get it checked out. Hopefully Heronflight wouldn't be upset. She just wanted to make the leaders den more fire. It was ugly.
Petuniakit looked down at her shells. "I'm not leaving until we get these shells. Kestrelstar's going to love them for his den. And the flowers are going to perfect for father.", she meowed, puffing out her chest.
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Marigoldleap is my main character and is currently an outsider if anybody wants to roleplay with her or has a small plot they need an extra cat for.
This was a somber moment, there was no getting away from acknowledging that much. Plumstorm had her fair share of them, yet they'd always been for her and her alone. Apart from standing around the graves somewhere along this beach with a pawful of other cats, this was the first time she was really sharing an emotional moment with another cat unabashed.
It was nice to know that there was someone else who came to the water when they wanted to think.
For as long as she could remember, she'd been doing that.
Coming to Gatherings to lay on the shore, away from the crowds so she could shut her eyes and meditate. Finding her way to the Clan's border back when she was in their enemy Clan, so she could listen to the peaceful burble of the river. Even traversing the caves with Lionstorm- The mysterious and almost frightening sound of water that bounced off of the walls and filled her ears.
Water held a strange allure.
"Who is 'they'?" she questions quietly, inhaling deeply to exert a hollow sigh. "Perhaps. Perhaps it all means something, and our ancestors are truly watching and praying that we make the right choices. But..." She pauses, and looks down at her paws as they shuffle the sand about. Then her eyes reunite with the tide ahead. "You can't let yourself wait for 'meant to be' to come to you, y'know? You have to decide on that for yourself. If you're sad for the rest of your life, was it simply 'meant to be'?" Plumstorm shakes her head.
Glancing at Ottersplash, she wonders if he'd understand all of that. It almost felt possible. But catching the tom as his eyes began to brim with unspilled tears, a spark of guilt pokes her heart. She returns her gaze to the ocean. That was private. She didn't want to pressure the tom.
But much like his own thoughts, the silver she-cat had trouble with saying something afterwards. 'Sorry' didn't cut it, 'sorry' felt empty and far too little a word today. "Comparing your hurt to another's is being too mean to yourself. There will always be something worse somewhere, and there will always be something less somewhere else. And although none of it is the same and shouldn't be treated as such, your hurt is just as meaningful as mine, as theirs. Try to remember that."
She felt... Strange about sharing anything more of herself with Ottersplash, but Plumstorm didn't want to make him think the worst or something. And, here on Lionsbeach, they seemed to find a connection to one another. That wasn't to say she was 'feeling' something, because that would be too simple. She just recognized that where they both were in their respective lives, was probably more similar than either cat thought.
"I don't want to look back," she murmurs finally. "And I don't, not really. But sometimes I think of what would have happened if I just didn't wake up."
Those words were harder to get out than she thought they would be. And once she'd spoken them aloud, her throat tightened. Tears spring to her eyes as well.
"I was a ThunderClan apprentice. Even back then, I should have been a warrior. I knew everything. Denmates who came after me also left before me. It was like they'd forgotten I still needed a name too. I had three mentors at once, and none of them would call me out. One day, I went hunting on my own at the cliffs on the edge of their land. Anyone could have fallen, it's not a matter of skill. Anyone... Anyone would have. That day, 'anyone' just happened to be me."
Plumstorm smiles bitterly. "No one came."
After another heartbeat, she shakes her head. "A loner picked me up. I spent weeks with them as I healed. I decided not to go back because I was still upset. But then, that fire swept through the territory, and I let myself get carried away with the thought of being home again, helping to recover. So I went back. My mentor hadn't realized I was gone."
Glancing sideways at Ottersplash, she flicks her tail and lets out a little laugh again. "So I went to the border, and met Gentlethunder, Flowerpaw, and some others. They took me to Lionstorm- Lionstar at the time- And that was that. I was learning from the ground up again, and still somehow couldn't make any lasting connections in the Clan. Some creep of a warrior tried to get way too close to me, and that was seen to quickly. But even then, where wasn't much followup. And now, Lionstorm's dead."
The she-cat sweeps her tail over the sand, nodding to the beach as though it were a big gesture. "So here we are, the two of us."
[ @Ziera - sorry for the rambling and the whole life sotry jnfsd ]
Petuniakit just kept on watching while making sure no stupid bird stole her pile. She still wanted to take them back. Maybe Palepaw could help her. Once the bird was finished she moved out. She poked the bird. Yep it was dead. Awesome!
"That was amazing!", she meowed in excitement. Her wounds hurt, but not as big as the one where a bit of her flesh was missing. It hurt a lot more. She'd need to get it checked out. Hopefully Heronflight wouldn't be upset. She just wanted to make the leaders den more fire. It was ugly.
Petuniakit looked down at her shells. "I'm not leaving until we get these shells. Kestrelstar's going to love them for his den. And the flowers are going to perfect for father.", she meowed, puffing out her chest.
Palepaw's head swivels to watch Petuniakit as she approached to make sure the bird was dead before looking back to the sky. She tensed as she claimed she wasn't leaving without her shells, turning back to her, lips pulling over her teeth in a snarl. "You can come back for them another time, when you arent bleeding out and there arent more birds in the distance. You can carry what you have, but I'm not staying for you to find more."
Nor would she be helping carry them. She'd carry the bird (why waste perfectly good prey) and, if Petuniakit was slow enough or said she hurt, maybe the kit could sit on her back, but she wasn't going to carry the shells.
Pointless little frivolities, was that really what she'd risked her life for?
She hisses under her breath, but otherwise says nothing else to Petuniakit. She really was her father's daughter.
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Profile picture drawn by Rani and used with permission
Add me on PokémonGo: K9WVBVJYJ
While I do not (currently) have any cats in the Clan's, I try to have at least a few role plays with my outsiders (Sedgestorm, Woollyfeather) and my StarClanner Coldamber. Most of my role plays until I feel well enough to keep up with sweeps will be related to Covenant of the Sky duties.
Petuniakit wasn't used to be growled or yelled at. Her father or mother never did. Her ears flattened. Were all apprentices this grumpy? If they were she never wanted to be an apprentice. Well she wouldn't be an apprentice for a little while longer as she wasn't allowed out of camp. Such a dumb rule.
"Fine.", she snapped. She picked up as many shells as she could(two) and two flowers. Petuniakit was ready to leave. She didn't care what the punishment was. This was a fun day even despite almost getting pecked to death by a seagull.
Re: Lionsbeach
