Quote:
Originally Posted by Charmer
Shinefang listened, his tail twitching as his leader accepted his proposal. The old tom's shoulder's relaxed at first and a small sigh escaped him, until Grousestar began to talk of Starclan and their role in Shinefang's decision. "Understand, Grousetar, Starclan has nothing to do with my decision here." Shinefang lifted a paw to groom the fur behind his ears, trying to disguise the fact that his fur had bristled with the beginnings of anger at the mention of the foxhearts of Silverpelt. "I'm asking to do this because my clan needs me, and I believe this is the best way for me to serve them now. And if I have your blessing to begin, that is precisely what I'll do. After all, unlike some of these younger cats, I have no problem going without a mate. What shecat would want a grizzled old tom like me anyway?" he meowed, his whiskers twitching with amusement at his own self-deprecating joke. Though the truth was, ever since Slatepelt's death, and losing their kits he'd had no interest in trying to have a family again. His life was Skyclan, and Skyclan was his life.
It was all the old cat needed. He didn't need family, or friends, or Starclan. Starclan had done nothing but taken from him. In the old warrior's mind, taking the medicine cat position was a claw to Starclan's collective faces, a resounding yowl of, 'keep your paws off my clan!' During this time when the cold of leafbare crept closer and a medicine cat was most needed and the clan vulnerable without one, he would defend his clan with herbs instead of claws and teeth. Shinefang had made no secret of his anger toward Starclan after his mate's death and had no doubt it would be on Grousestar's mind. "Before you worry that head of yours over Starclan and I, remember that I'm no fool. I know that speaking with and interpreting signs from Starclan comes with the territory of being a medicine cat. Here's a little bit of wisdom for you: even mousebrains can have good ideas, and even foxhearts can save your pelt. I know that, and I know that when Starclan speaks, as much as I'd like to have their glittering pelts to line my nest, they should be listened to. Any cats with with wisdom that can assist Skyclan should be listened to," Shinefang said, resolution in his gaze. "And as long as you're leader, I promise to share with you all that you need to serve Skyclan as best you can."
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Hearing what Shinefang said, the leader could only raise a brow in quiet surprise, but elected not to say anything as it seemed the tom would continue on talking, likely to expand on his current statement. "Now Shinefang, there is a cat for everyone. A she-cat should not love you for your appearance, but for your heart. And I agree that the clan does need a medicine cat, thought I'm not quite sure what you meant by Starclan not having any influence on your decision." The tip of his tail flicked slightly, the thought worrying him that the new medicine cat wasn't overly fond, or downright hateful to their warrior ancestors. Grousestar, while he had no true relationship with Starclan as a medicine cat and Starclan have, he did have a lot of faith in them, and believed in their importance for clan life. Without Starclan to guide them.. How would they continue? Grousestar was fond of Starclan, even if he didn't always understand their mysterious ways.
Shinefang's words did little to sate his worry, all of the toms mentioning of his distaste for their warrior ancestors only made him more uncomfortable. His parents were in Starclan, and surely his brother too, along with the family's and friends of others, and leaders past. They were not to be disrespected in Grousestar's mind. So he seemed quite visibly uncomfortable when Shinefang stated that he'd rather like to line his nest with their glittering pelts, though made no motion to stop the cat from speaking. He had the right to his own opinion. "Right, I appreciate your honesty, and I appreciate your willingness to share whatever Starclan sends you. I'm sure you will make a fine medicine cat for Skyclan." With an almost awkward smile, the leader would nod towards the tom to affirm what he had said with a physical notion.