[lio]

songs.
what may come to mind once you hear that very word? happiness? sadness? the sound of birds chirping in the early morning?
or is it a grumpy apprentice that never seems to smile?

why, yes, he does have emotions, but chooses not to show them. they distract him from the work he is doing, and cause others to notice him as well.

he doesn’t want to be noticed.

who would ever want to? being noticed opens a doorway to ridicule. ridicule leads to humiliation. humiliation leads to sadness, and so on. he doesn’t want that.

meet songpaw.
he’s a small, brown tabby tom with molten amber eyes. his voice is of an irish tone, while his fur is short and body slender. pupils always narrowed, songpaw observes the clan from afar, albeit still at the age of six moons. well, nearly six moons.

the tabby had never felt urged to become the best warrior he could be, unlike the other felines in which he had spent time within the nursery with. now, you may think, why is his name songpaw if he doesn’t even fit any description of a song? well, let me tell you. songpaw’s mother, lilly, was a loner. she had always woken up in the earliest of mornings just to hear the birds all sing their songs around her, like a soothing blanket.

when song was only two moons, his father had come back from who-knows-where. the tom had wanted to take him, to raise him as his own; lilly could always have more kits, of course. but she did not want that. song had been her firstborn son- her only son- and she didn’t want to give that up, so she risked her life to save him.

thankfully, she had not been killed, but the father of song had become bored with the endless battle, finally giving up and fleeing. lilly then took song to shadowclan and raised him to the age of five moons before leaving. she did not dislike the clan, but it was not comfortable for her. at this very moment, she is escaping the territories in fear that she may want to have her child back. but he is in safe paws.

songpaw never noticed the medicine cat den, or what happens within it. then again, he had always remained inside the nursery besides stretching his legs. the tom is rather introverted, not enjoying the company of others. he may also become anxious and fidgety when too many people crowd around him at once. songpaw also tends to be short-tempered and agitated, often times snapping at those who don’t listen to him. he may be a kit, but he is not one for humor or disobedience. it is very rare to see songpaw truly happy instead of forcing a smile into his gaze.

although he desires to keep them hidden, songpaw fears quite a few things. for example, he fears the sight of someone’s death. even the thought sends a shudder down his spine.

he also does not comprehend the deal of ‘love.’ what is the point? he may ask, face contorted with disgust. what a curious thing, songpaw shall say afterwords, though discomfort will glimmer in his eyes.

when asked about starclan, songpaw will simply shrug. he neither hates nor worships them. in his logic, he will say to those who ask for an explanation that he is not a cat of religion, but one who will side with others when needed. unless starclan is proved to be real, he doesn’t believe in them. and if you ask him what he wants to be in the future, he will simply shrug and say, “i don’t know.”

songpaw.
if you came up to me and asked what may come to mind once i hear the word, i would not answer simply. my answer would neither contain happiness, sadness, nor anything other than one word.

and that word would be 'songs.'

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Wildness
Of
Life
Yielding Our Hearts

Praying For A Way To
Overcome The Darkness
Lying To Ourselves
You Will Not Be Free.