Quote:
Originally Posted by yummyluc
spiderflight did have nothing to say. what could she say? there was nothing but guilt and regret boiling in her gut where pride had once been. she was used to upsetting cats, it was nothing new, but the way that fallingheart sounded. the way her attitude had done a complete 180 turn from monotone to shattered, it just made spiderflight think for once. she was talkative, and hardly recognised the words that came out of her mouth until they were said, but now she did. they were repeating in her head over and over, and they made her sound like an ass. it didn't sound like her at all. why had she said those things? for her pride? for her ego? why had she let such harsh, disgusting words slip from her lips? she took a few steps back, looking at the ground as if searching for her answer in the frosted grass. a feeling bloomed in her gut. it was sinking and engulfing and dark. it bubbled up to her throat and spread down to her paws. it filled her ears with the beat of her heart following the rhythm of a rough sea on a stormy night. it swallowed her whole and suddenly it felt like she was drowning, and the salty tang of the ocean filled her eyes and she felt as though she might start crying. spiderflight blinked rapidly, the black hole that had opened up in her heart made her chest hurt physically and mentally. was this.. guilt? regret? was this how it felt to realise the consquences of actions that you never thought twice about? spiderflight felt like choking. the words were spilling out of her mouth before she could stop them and she kept taking steps back, away from the small pond. she felt so cold and numb, it was strange to her, how she felt so out of her body but felt everything inside it at the same time. she was beginning to panic. |
fallingheart didnt care that she wasnt saying anything, she preferred it almost. it was probably going to be something snarky or sarcastic anyway. she didnt want to hear what she had to say. she didnt care if she was sorry or not, or what she was thinking. she was just happy for the silence. it gave her time to think. all of those things spiderflight had said had been true. they hurt immensely, but they had been true. it stung for someone who didnt even know her to point them out. she glared at the taller molly through green slits, gaining back some of her emotionless composure. she couldnt believe she had let spiderflight see her cry, show emotion. shed check herself next time.
there were so many things running through her brain it was giving her a real headache this time. she closed her eyes and let out a breat, a puff of smoke following along after it in contrast to the bitter coldness of both the weather, and the vibe between the two. while normally she would sit here all day until spiderflight left, wanting the last laugh and being rather stubborn, she stood up. she gave one last glare to spiderflight before turning around and making the motion to leave.