[graves]

Originally Posted by yummyluc

Of course, at the invitation, Marshfur sucked in a silent breath. What exactly were they trying to get at? It's not like they could help her, even if they understood her, she was lost. She was gone. There was no way they could drag her out of the grave she'd dug, even if they grit their teeth and dig their paws into the dirt. Still, some strange part of her decided to speak up, the most its done in the recent moons that she's chipped away in until she was the hollow vessel that called itself Marshfur. The beast growled in her ear, making it flicker against its demands. She never defied the beast, but for some reason, this was different. She didn't like to admit it, but it was. The beast didn't like it either, but strangely it was muffled. Now, Marshfur could ear distant conversations and the soft russle of leaves in the wind. Daydream's words seemed to make sense to her now. Her face screwed up in confusion, but she forced the expression away, blinking a few times before she got up, not exactly sure why.

"Okay." But the way she said it made her seem so distant, she might have been talking to herself. The beast tried to stick its claws in deeper, tried to drag her back down, tried to make her refuse, but now she was beginning to notice the cage she was in begin to bend.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd spoken to anyone, really spoken to anyone. Other than one-word answers or shrugs, she didn't really... speak. Even before everything, she never spoke much, the shy kit that hated interaction. An only kit. Her mother and father died in a flood, perhaps the reason she'd tried to make one her own demise. She couldn't quite recall how she'd lost Hazelpaw, her younger sister. Her only sibling. But she knew she never liked to talk about it. Throughout the events, Marshfur shrunk. She kept to herself and stopped feeling entirely. Shoving any and all friends and love interests away, perhaps afraid to lose anymore. Now, she didn't care. If anyone of her Clanmates died, she might not have even shown up to the funeral. She was slowly suffocating in all the memories she was burying, each one piling on top of her, each one heavier than the last. The way Daydream was speaking to her, the way they just seemed to understand, whether or not they voiced it. It was like being able to breathe again.

they knew not all cats were the same, they had studied it. some were talkative, they acknowledged their flaws. they voiced it. others were quieter about it, they may acknowledge it, they may not, but remained silent nonetheless. they would let it build up like a snow ball tumbling down a hill, only getting bigger and bigger as time went on, until it destroyed whatever was in its path, its target. they knew that what was happening. they didnt know how long truly this has been going on, but it was only a matter of time before she was lead to self destruction.

there was no herb or medication that gave others happiness, no. thats not how it worked, daydream had learned it too well, too harshly. you could eat as many plants as you wanted, but it would never truly fill the hunger, the emptiness. there was no diagnoses plan they could follow, nothing geckoleaf had taught them could prepare them for things like this. but, they knew how cats worked. they knew how they worked. they were stubborn, they didnt like help. never accepted it. they busied themself with their work instead. they didnt sleep,and when they did, they were faced with night terrors. ones where they could feel every rip, every tear of the skin, feel every bone crack. it was terrible, and painful. so instead, they treated. they knew somewhat, how she worked.

they gave a gentle nod, turning away towards the camp exit, walking sow and taking a glance behind them to make sure she was following, that they werent going to be leaving her behind.
[go ahead n post in shc territory ?]

Originally Posted by Charmer

The truth was, at the gathering, Nightpaw had been worried about herself too. She had found herself in the heat of a massive battle with no idea how to fight. If Snowpaw hadn't gotten her to safety, she didn't know what might have happened. And poor Risingstorm had taken a beating keeping that Dusk Syndicate cat away from her. "I was scared too," she said honestly. She hadn't realized that Daydream cared this much about her. She knew that she had always thought Daydream was the best, but imagined she probably annoyed them more than anything. And Daydream had lost so much. She knew from the trip to Skyclan that Geckoleaf was gone, and that Daydream had been really close with her, and she'd already told Nighpaw about her father and she'd heard about Cricketpaw too. It might have felt like a big responsibility to be all Daydream had if it weren't for the fact that she was so happy to be there for them. In Nightpaw's eyes, Daydream could do no wrong and she was as devoted as any cat could be. She looked at Daydream and smiled. "You won't lose me. You and Goldenstar are helping me to be a great warrior so that I can protect myself. And everyone in Shadowclan. I'm not going anywhere." She said it with confidence because she truly believed it. Even if something were to happen to her and she went to Starclan, she'd watch over Daydream and Shadowclan like a queen protecting her kits. But she didn't plan on dying. Not while even one of her friends needed her here. "I'm here," she said with a warm smile.

the words were more comforting then she realized. it felt they had lost everything. they were just...so..so tired. so tired of waking up everyday and doing the same thing, of having trouble sleeping, everything. they wanted a break. they leaned against her now, head resting ontop of hers as a purr rumbled in their chest endearingly. ¨thank you.¨ they didnt know why they had such a connection to her, they didnt know why they had felt so attached from the beginning, but they were glad. as much of a pain in the beginning she was at first, it was beyond worth it. ¨i love you.¨ of course, they meant that in a friend way. the words almost felt foreign--they hadn't said those words in so long. ever since geckoleaf had went missing. it felt..nice. nice to care for someone again.