[doghouse]

Originally Posted by Ever

The mother wasn't really sure what to do in this situation.
Sure, she'd been through it a billion times in her head in hopes of being reunited with her children, but it was all too real now. Her eyes were hard and unreadable though, as Ash had spent too much time masking her emotions to be able to reveal them again in front of another. Her tail tip twirled with excited anxiousness. A small step forward and a smile of reserved hope was seen in the molly as Tawnypaw recognized her. However she wasn't sure how to start their relationship. Her motherhood had been stolen from her by the place she resided, she had only barely seen her kits start walking before she was killed. She winced and looked at the ground in shame. She wondered what they thought of her, they were for the most part raised in a clan that used her name as a curse. A clan that saw her as nothing more than a shadow of darkness, a murderous and bloodthirsty image. Ash told herself that she wouldn't be hurt if any of them though ill of her, they had a better chance at life if they did, but it would deeply scar her. All of her decisions did. Though the dark tabby molly also knew that if she got a second chance she wouldn't have changed anything, not one second of it. She still craved the fame and glory of leadership, though she knew it would never come again.

"I-" She didn't know where to start. Should she apologize for her actions, for the shadow she had cast upon this youngster? She took a pawstep back again, knowing this was everything she shouldn't be doing. She shouldn't meet her litter until they either end up here or lead a happy life in Starclan with their father, never to be seen by her. It would be better for them that way. She decided honesty, Ash had never been great with words and had always spoken her heart, no matter how blunt it may be. "I don't know where to start." She said simply, her voice a whisper as her unwavering golden eyes watched her daughter's reaction and movements very carefully. The minute she felt as though things would go sour she would break the communication. Ash just needed to know if Tawnypaw was willing to make a connection between them, or if the new clan had too far pushed her away from her mother's dark image.

Tawnypaw stood, frozen in place by shock. She had always wished to get to be back with her mother again, but now? She didn't know what to do. She wished she simply could walk over and act as if nothing had ever happened and she'd been raised by her mother, but Tawnypaw knew she wouldn't be able to do that. Too long had her Clanmates pushed her away or bullied her or ignored her for her to be able to confidently walk up to any catgut Ratpaw and her two remaining siblings, Dovepaw and Onyxpaw. Her neck fur bristled, but the small apprentice forced it to lay flat. She slowly, hesitantly took another step closer, head and tail lowered in uncertainty. She looked at this cat, her mother, who was dead. It was strange, seeing her mother transparent, unlike the vague images she could still remember from when she was very young, they had been solid. Tawnypaw remembered how she'd thought her family would always stay the same: her, Blazingnight, Burdockpool, Blackkit, Mountainkit, Dovekit and Onyxkit. She'd never thought it would be torn apart the way it had been. Shaking her head, she glanced back at Blazingnight with widened golden amber eyes. She wondered for a split second what was running through her mother's mind, then decided it was best not to wonder that. And suddenly, Tawnypaw looked down, her eyes feeling itchy and watery.

When she looked back up, tears soaked the fur under her eyes, and she started walking forwards, forcing herself to keep going, until she stood two tail lengths away, her paws itching, telling her this wasn't right. Finally, she raised her head,
careful to avoid Blazingnight's unreadable golden stare. “I don't e-either.” she choked out, her mouth feeling like she'd bitten into a rat only to find ashes and soot fill her mouth, soaking up all the moisture. Tawnypaw had so many questions, but they all seemed wrong to her, not the right questions to ask. Finally, she knew exactly what she wanted to do. “W-we— I miss you..” she said, hoping that that was entirely true. She knew from the time she'd talked to Dovepaw— Dovekit then, and Onyxpaw— Onyxkit then, that both of them had definitely seemed to be missing both parents at the time. She wondered how Blazingnight was going to react, but all she could do was stand there, kneading the ground with her claws as she waited.