Quote:
Originally Posted by alec
( @ Marigoldwhisper ) at the mention of fadingsun reality suddenly dawned on her, she had falsely assumed the kit knew any of the things that had happened since they spoke last time and she so very apperantly didnt.
a quiet "oh-" escaped her before minkpaw was able to do anything about this, "im sorry, i- well, i assumed you knew what happened." she wouldve laughed if this wasnt such a horrible situation, assuming the kit knew what she knew, embarassing.
"i told you about birdsnow right? she was going to be our riverclans leader and she appointed fadingsun to be her deputy and help her, but she fell ill and fadingsun stepped up. birdsnow is going to be okay but now, fadingsun will be riverclans leader." the reminder of explaining the kit how the clans worked and who was where stung, but what stung even more was that she couldnt have this conversation with the kit in the nursery. she couldnt walk into the nursery and tell the kit she had done it, instead she had to rip well deserved rest from tiny paws to tell her about failure.
"and since tansypaw left we didnt have a medicine cat, right? so i tried to look out for everyone and-" she paused, silent and unmoving apart from the tremor coursing through her while they swallowed tears they had thought had long dried. "-and fadingsun finally appointed a medicine cat." shame burned in the back of her throat and the corner of her eyes, she didnt want to be here. "and its mistyshard.". silence hung heavy between all consuming fog and silent tears.
"i met a cat." she began after what mustve been minutes, "his name is mossfreckle and hes shadowclans medicine cat"
"i thought about simply staying away for a while and then coming back to riverclan but i have nobody else and i dont think i can be out and alone for moons on end. and i dont think i can ever come back to riverclan." she was sick of her own bad explanation, the struggle of trying to transform her feelings into words wouldve bordered on infuriating if she wasnt so darn tired. too tired to do much more than accept it.
"i never wanted to leave you behind and i will never forgive myself for active so desperately self centered but i dont even want to offer you come with me because this was my mistake and you shouldnt have to deal with it." the thought of simply taken marigoldkit with her, wherever she went and protect her from what she knew to be a world filled with death and grief.
"but no matter where i am and no matter what clan either of us are in, i will never leave you." there was too much to say, too much to get off her chest. too many thoughts, feelings and words constricting her throat leaving her with nothing but the desperate urgency to get it all out.
"except if you dont want me to contact you. if you dont want to see me ever again i will respect your wishes and not talk to you again."
( just realised mink can train her via dream this is awesome )
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Marigoldkit
She\Kit\RC
"Keep your head up! You need to look at the world around you!"
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Assumed? How could she possibly assume anything! Minkpaw knew she was practically living under a rock, taken prisoner by her own growing nausea. That was enough to keep Marigoldkit's fur bristled.
She listened as Minkpaw took that time to explain, and during that lecture--- a lecture that was bittersweet and nostalgic ----her anger finally faded to a manageable amount. A medicine cat? They hadn't had one already? Huh... Okay so the order was Tansypaw then Mistyshard. She took notice of Minkpaw's growing sadness and she laid a careful paw on their shoulder. She still couldn't bring herself to say much else as she was still processing this information. Yet, Minkpaw deserved comfort even if it wasn't audible.
Dang it... More names? Marigoldkit was sure that she'd be waking up with a splitting headache from all this information. Okay okay... So Mossfreckle was Shadowclan's medicine cat... Also apparently Fadingsun was the new leader. Marigoldkit saw sure what to think about that especially since she quite recently just got introduced to
another leader. Are they supposed to come and go this fast?
As her clanmate--- no no. She wasn't her clanmate anymore. Infact, she wasn't sure what Minkpaw was now ---further explained herself Marigoldkit began fighting back tears all over again. Hearing her thought process alone was stressing her out, she couldn't imagine having to decide what she had to.
"You're not self centered," Marigoldkit piped up with an edge lacing her voice. "You thought about what I might think before inviting me to come with you..."
What she said next make her rush to her trembling paws, her hazel milky eyes finally meeting her gaze after what felt like moons. She'd only looked at Minkpaw's twice. Once to figure out their color, twice to see what kind of nasty scar had formed on it. This time she was merely doing it to get her point across, her own heart weighing her down like a boulder of shame.
"No!" She screeched as she stood to her toes. "No... Please please visit me. I'm sorry if I sounded angry before, I'm sorry if it seems like I'd never wanna see you again, but that's wrong. I don't hate you Minkpaw... I said I'd be there for you, right? Plus, you're my best friend, why would I give that up?"
(WHAT GHE HECK!!! THATD BE SO DARN COOL! I'm very open to that idea)